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Current PM in the morning: "Startup flexibility! I'm at the beach chilling in the sun! I trust you can do standup without me! #tech-detox #positive-energy"

Current PM in the afternoon: "ARE ALL THE FUCKING TASKS FUCKING DONE YET? THERE ARE ONLY 9 DAYS LEFT IN THE FUCKING SPRINT! WHY HAS NOTHING BEEN DEPLOYED YET?"

This is why I hate wireless earbuds: You don't have a wire available for strangling coworkers.

Comments
  • 13
    >> /dev/null
  • 10
    seems to be a grand time, the PM had at the beach.

    Maybe the PM dropped their ice cream or something
  • 9
    Now that is a capital asshole you got there. It also seems to have a negative leadership skill.
  • 11
    It's time to follow his example and take a day or two free to go at the beach, to do some #pm-detox

    you know what? you worked hard, take the whole week, i'm sure all this #positive-energy will help with the release at the end of the fucking spring

    Maybe encourage a few of your colleagues to join you as well, as a team-building exercise
  • 3
    Startup flexibility! I'm at the spa chilling in my robe! I trust you to do deployments without me! #moron-detox #positive-skiving
  • 0
    I would have strangled the PM at "#tech-detox #positive-energy"
  • 0
    "I trust you" my ass. You don't even do any of the work you fucker!
  • 1
    @kiki Don't think anyone is arguing against flexibility here. This is about the boss doing nothing while reprimanding devs for not magically completing & deploying everything in the sprint with 9 days remaining.
  • 1
    @kiki

    Yeah it's just that this PM seems bipolar.

    One moment it's "everyone chill, think about your mental health, don't work too hard, don't stress", the next moment he (and really no one else) gets a panic/guilt attack about his own procrastination, and lashes out at everyone.

    The rest of the team is just pretty consistently delivering at 8/10 productivity, while he regularly swoops from zero to 11 and back.

    He's also pretty much dead weight -- The team functions despite him. Regardless of his efforts as PM, engineers have grown used to PM-ing their way around him by themselves, doing his work for him.

    It's a bit of a sad shit-show, but CTO for some reason likes him, so we have to deal with it.
  • 0
    They didn’t get done because the team followed the PM’s lead and went to the beach too. 😂
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