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!rant && extra('worried');

My 11 years-old brother seems to be addicted to Minecraft, not the "dis iz so kool" addiction, but the "I put my health and education in danger to keep playing this game (homeworks badly done, grades free falling, showers without soap in 30s flat, food eaten in 15s, starts to yell at parents when they want him to stop playing (parents bitch slapped him a few times for this, but he seems to persist)).

My parents are over 55 now, so they don't really know how to handle this (can't / don't want to blame them), and I'm supposed shove some reason in his dead brain next weekend (I live 150km away).
I've been addicted myself to videogames in general and WoW in particular ((almost) no regrets) a few years back.. what should I say to him else than "This shit will ruin your life even before you started it" (which is planned anyway) ?

Comments
  • 6
    Warcraft was the ruin of me too. Playing all night when I was a uni student instead of going out with my friends more. But I was rather lonely as a child and didn't have real friends until after high school. Most forms of addiction are a substitute for loneliness. Does he have friends? Try to suggest other fun activities to him. If he likes spending time in front of the computer at least he could do something more productive like coding or designing. Or at least give him some single player games, those aren't so addictive and you can pause them and not fight with your family.

    P.S.
    Fucking minecraft??? Tell him to get addicted to a real game, jesus, kids these days.
  • 6
    Has he ever been tested for the spectrum? I work with autistic teens and this sounds a lot like many of my cases. I've seen countless kids start where he is and slowly progress to the point where the family no longer feels like they can handle the situation & just want to help. Unfortunately, most the time they'll go to a facility because the behaviors and routines have progressed to the point of needing total control over the situation.

    I would suggest some testing & professional help, it's probably not as simple as just being "addicted" to a video game.
  • 9
    My brother was the same way. It was difficult to get him to stop since my parents wouldn't do anything, not to mention, my brother is violent and has anger issues.
    What I did is I stopped being a doormat and took away the tablet, computer, and PS3. I told him he could have it back when he ends this addiction.
    He trashed my room and slammed his door, so I took his door away. He yelled at me, so I took more of his stuff. I tried to teach him that all this is a privileged, not a right. As his older sister, I will not tolerate such behavior.
    He threw a glass cup at me and I was bleeding so I stopped talking to him and didn't give his stuff back.
    After a few months, he started to behave. I returned his door and items in his rooms, but I didn't return his electronics.
    After 2 years of not returning them, he's learned to live without minecraft.
    He's still spoiled, angry, and violet, but his behavior has improved.
    I might give it back within the next 3 months if he keeps it up :).
  • 1
    When I was at his age (and older) my parents gave me some dutyes to do, like cleaning my room, cooking, and having a non negative mark in every test. I could do what l want until such thing were done...
  • 1
    Bitch slapping has hardly broken any gamer's resolution. Still, good that they tried! πŸ˜…
  • 3
    @Michelle You are a tough sister. I mean, 2 years is a loooong time. I'm glad I didn't have you as my sister. πŸ˜‚ My sister can't stay angry for too long. But again, if you were my sister, maybe I'd be doing a lot better at coding than I am doing now. 😁
  • 3
    (And my flatmate asks while I love this community...)

    @jsframework9000 Very good idea about talking him into development, plus my father told me that "he wanted to do like me", so what if he stays on the computer for the grearer causes ? (nice nickname by the way πŸ˜‚)

    @SHA-16384 I'm planning to do both actually, going indirect and big brow not at the same time but to try to make see the whole picture of what I think

    @softban I honestly don't believe that he is autisticw simply because he was "normal" before being addicted. (Normal grades but struggling, tons of friends...) But since you're the pro and I'm not, I'll talk about this to my parents even though they aren't as open minded as I am so I don't know if they'll want to try

    @BindView OH HELL NO. I want to get him out of an addiction, not to give him cancer πŸ˜‚

    @Michelle I suggest you change your nickname to 'Rambo' or something 😁 Stay strong, It must be tough sometimes πŸ’ͺ
  • 1
    I feel you @Drillan767. Been facing similar issue with my cousin. Since his parents are fed up with his activities and his sister won't deal with him, they've asked me to do something.

    Well, I am the youngest in my family and if anything I am the one getting scolding for not doing my work on time. My sister would sometimes make me do stuff but I know by experience its not very effective.

    I don't wanna repeat possible things to do, I'll begin by asking what steps have you tried? Since its gaming, I've been trying to encourage my brother to try to make games himself rather than play one. Suggest him to use Scratch if you haven't already. Maybe stay with him for sometime and intrigue him about the interesting things you've been doing. Ask your parents to spend some more family time.

    Like mentioned, make it evident that what he has is pleasure, a commodity, not a right. Children generally get this idea that they can play game forever from YouTube channels. Need to be told otherwise.
  • 0
    Mincraft succ's after the 1.9 update!
  • 1
    Minecraft....? Really?

    Show him EVE Online!

    Fight fire with fire :)
  • 2
    @World So far, I did nothing, I was aware of this two days ago. I'll also tell him what you (and someone else sorry I couldn't remember who x.x) said, that this is but a privilege.

    But I guess it'll have to go through a wean mode if it's as bad as it looks
  • 0
    @Drillan767 Do keep us updated! And mention me. I wanna know how you solve this πŸ˜‚ I'm pretty much out of options so a solution is appreciated.
  • 2
    @Drillan767 I believe that Minecraft works over specific port, you can try to block that port on your home router, or maybe better, see if you can limit bandwidth over specific port so it will look like Minecraft issue... It works but barely playable.
  • 1
    Damn I miss Minecraft...
    Your brother is really young tho, it's kinda difficult to know beforehand if he will care about advises, the addiction could even make any question about "playing too much" raise his anger
    I guess a good strategy could be to play it with him (really play it, get into the game and the objective) and try to talk him about it while playing. This way he might be more relaxed.
    The fact that you're the brother and not a parent really helps tho, especially if you've played games too, it makes you more able to understand him and he'll feel it, he'll see that you know what you're talking about
  • 2
    I'm Dutch and direct:

    ask him if he wants to be fat, unemployed, straight up gross lacking any personal hygiene, living at home while he's 30, remaining single / a virgin for his life.

    it worked for my mom when she wasn't studying and my uncle asked her if she wanted to end up as a factory worker.
  • 2
    @oscarascal The thing is even though I'm a gamer myself, Minecraft isn't some thing that I dig, and I clearly don't have enough time to play with him (I usually start playing at 6.30 pm till 00:30 am but I often havr to pause to do stuff (making food, eating it, being social with my flatmate...) So i don't think it will be interesting in a way, and that's why I'll try to make myself as clear as possible for a 11 years old kid
  • 1
    Tell him that girls think that minecraft is lame and everyone who is playing it is a loserπŸ‘Œ
  • 1
    @Jop- yes it is ! πŸ˜‚ I'm in love with the lore
  • 0
    @Jop- Well yeah, it belongs to a defined genre (RPG) and has quests and stuff and like @Drillan767 said, awesome lore. Minecraft just looks like digital legos for people who like to create stuff but are too lazy to learn how to make proper 3d models.(I have never actually played minecraft though, I'd rather play a 2d game instead of a 3d game that looks like it was made in the early 1990's) If you want to play sandbox games, the Sims are a lot more fun.
  • 0
    @balte I mean sure scare tactics and all but if this guy has watched any youtube he’ll know that’s just completely wrong.. I mean as examples, look at
    - Sp4zie
    - Doublelift
    - Pewdiepie
    - C9 Shroud
    None of these people are fat, ungroomed, live in their parents basement or have no chance at a gf (I know DL has one and Sp4zie had one for 7 years before they broke up a few months ago, don’t know anything about pewdiepie or shroud)

    And even the only neckbeard/fat streamer I know of (Imaqtpie) makes a shitton Of money (I think I’ve heard the number $1,000,000 be thrown around but I’m not sure)
  • 0
    @AngryDev Yeah but those are only a few people out of the millions that play games. Maybe he can dare his brother to make money out of Minecraft. A kid in my neighbourhood makes and sells minecraft banners. If he's so good that he can make money playing games, then let him make a career out of gaming. Else he will just get frustrated(because he will realize he sucks at miecraft) and give up.
  • 1
    @World
    I was tired of beung a doorbell and allowing him to do what he wanted.
    Still, it's doing him some good :)
  • 3
    @AngryDev those people are not uneducated though. you can get discovered by luck, but you can't grow a brand out of pure luck.

    success = work. Even if you win the lottery: spend it the wrong way and you'll end up where you started, or worse.
  • 2
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