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Email. Fuck everything about it.

It's an obnoxious queue of messages I somehow must handle. And everyone in society expects you to have email. You can cancel your phone number, maybe even live without a house... but every hobo still must check their email.

It is an endless shitstream of things I don't want. Like a garden with some nice tomato plants, but then a really smelly weed starts invading and no matter what you do it keeps coming back.

I don't want to login to unsubscribe. I don't care about your "notifications center", or "managing the offers you receive from us".

And then your boss asks you to design an email campaign... I don't want to receive that shit, why would our customers? And even if I agreed with using email as a communication channel... YOU THOUGHT CSS IN INTERNET EXPLORER WAS A BITCH?

No really. Fuck email. Fuck everything about it.

Comments
  • 2
    I'm sorry :/
  • 8
    @hash-table especially for outlook, which used not the ie-rendering engine, but the office-word rendering engine!
    At my company we have a special department, who have to deal with this shit. Poor bastards :/
  • 5
    I don't get it. If I receive one email having unsubsribe somewhere in the body and I have not requested it, it goes to spam. All following emails from this company go directly to spam. This is how I unsubsribe. There are no exceptions.

    My inbox is always clean. And I never check spam folder.

    If only everyone would follow the same rule, your boss would not be stupid enough to ask you to create mailing campaign.
  • 1
    Outlook renders with IE I thought 😋
  • 2
    @karma I have no idea... all I know is that between the Gmail and Google Inbox apps on two versions of Android and two versions of iOS, and the webpages of both in 3 browsers, I already get 14 different results.

    Even for webmail the result is different between providers in the same browser and OS, so the amount of combinations is nearly infinite.
  • 1
    Those HTML senders are forcing me to use outlook sometimes as using mutt for looking at emails formated as websites is not effective. Was thinking about answering with simple websites containing the answer and send them plain text URLs but I am sure they wouldn't get the message about using plain text anyway
  • 1
    @karma depends on the version, they used to have the word rendering engine.
  • 3
    I honestly like it and somewhat depend on it for communicating with people who refuse to use anything else than WhatsApp :)
  • 1
    Lets all remember the stupid cunt that clicks "reply" instead of "reply all" in the middle of a long message chain and fucks it all up, creating a forked, yet linear, discussion.

    And later it's being forked even more and you find yourself doing human multiplexing.
  • 2
    @AlexDeLarge And that's what I love about it! It doesn't change at all which makes it a very reliable way of communicating imo :)
  • 1
    @linuxxx You could try a telegraph, maybe with an enigma device attached.
  • 1
    @AlexDeLarge Ohh haha, don't have any experience with that so can't judge on that one :P
  • 3
    Email newsletters should have been killed by the RSS feeds ... But noooo
  • 2
    @karma Weirdly enough, RSS feeds seem to be dying off, even though it's relatively simple to implement in most backend frameworks.
  • 1
    Maybe in times of smart phones and PWAs emails gonna get redundant?
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