Darn it, I was having such a good day. Just sitting over here in sysadmin land watching the Java devs tear their hair out over the Log4j vulnerability, when someone just had to ask me about the Jenkins servers my team maintains.

Jenkins doesn't use Log4j! What a relief!

Jenkins does, however, have third-party plugins, some of which use Log4j. And thus my relief was short-lived and now I'm also tearing out my hair trying to patch this shit.