My friend (not in CS) said his computer was a bit slow.
I told him I'd fix that for 10, he agreed.

I increased the cursor speed.
He bought it.

*This morning*
HR Lady: we saw your profile and we think it fits what we're looking for, I just need to know what you use for front-end programming

Me: I use ReactJs, AngularJs and for backend NodeJs

HR Lady: Hmm, so you don't use Javascript

Me: ... (unhandled exception in my head)

Me: M'am everything I mentioned is using Javascript

HR Lady: oh! ok.

Company wide ban on headphones at desks, because how can people be working if they're listening to music? Never felt so miserable in my life.

Fuck fuckitty fuck, with a side order of bollocks. May the senior management of this tight arsed tin pot cowboy outfit of a company all sleep soundly at their desks until Doomsday while the rest of us keep them in business. See, I'm not bitter...

Customer: URGENT, one sidebar is odd on that particular page on IE11
Me: *fixes the bug*
Me: New version will be available by next week

One week later

Customer: *does a negative review*
Customer: It is not working.
Me: *verify my fix is working* -> it does
Me: *verify my fix is available on his installation* -> it is
Me: Please upgrade the "Portal" module.
Customer: How do I do that ?
Me: In the list of installed modules, find "portal" and click "upgrade".
Customer: I did update the "Website" module, it is still not working.
Me: ...

What y'all up to?

Wow, didn't think about it like that 😂

Can someone explain the pricing for DO, AWS, or any other cheap hosting? DO $15 bucks for 1 database or multiple database in one server? AWS S3 or E2? Or should I stick with Heroku $7 (Web App server) and $9 for Postgres database?

Look! Buzzword wall!

I'm so exhausted lately ... Anybody know workaround / bugfix?

Please don't hurt your editor's feelings

At first I thought, damn there is something wrong with my phone, it sounds odd.

No I think one of my ears has stopped working. :-(

Damn ageing !

Was fine last night before I went to sleep..

Maybe a reboot tonight might make it magically work fine tomorrow..

I miss stereo..

This will degrade my performance in 3D shooters if I can't figure out where that bullet which just missed me came from !

Also makes it harder to code games with sound too..

Hertz the car rental company wanted a new website. They hired accenture. Accenture did allegedly a poor job. The site did not come with responsiveness, not with web components and 2 years over deadline. Hertz sues Accenture for $38+ million.

Scope creep deluxe?

print('I love U world !!')

I'm back !! After being fired from my job (read my prev rants) , after a week they called me and told me that I can return! (If only I promise that I'll control my curiosity and i'll never make the same mistake ever again)
It is just like a dream !!

I'm really glad that I listened to your advice and didn't do anything stupid :)

HOW THE FUCK DO I FUCKING INSTALL OPENCV YOU FUCKING CUNTS HOW ABOUT TO MAKE THINGS FUCKING SIMPLE PIECES OF SHIT CUNTS FUCK OFF

It's strange what you can learn when you have too much deadtime.

Last week I learned balloon twisting through youtube videos. A co-worker and I decorated the desk of a co-worker for her birthday.

I made her this balloon throne (from Game of Thrones). Notice that I was soooooo bored.

She loved it ^_^

Why are you expected to have people management skills as your experience grows? I don't want to deal with people, I just want to deal with my code 😢😫

Wait. When did that happen?! Am I crazy?

What is gay.js?

Fine, this might be the important sticker for any fine user...

What the fuck is this one-way interview bullshit?

"The organization you are interviewing with has come up with a series of interview questions that they have requested you to respond to. This is an on-demand interview which means that you'll be recording your video interview answers at your convenience as long as you submit them before the deadline." -- sparkhire.com

Like seriously?
What if I have questions? I have plenty, and I find those questions considerably more important than whatever bullshit gotchas the company wants to annoy me with.

One-way interview.
Fucking really.

At least have the decency to talk to me.