Debugging in real life

- Hello! Gordon's pizza?
- No sir it's Google's pizza.
- So it's a wrong number?
- No sir, Google bought it.
- OK. Take my order please ..
- Well sir, you want the usual?
- The usual? You know me?
- According to our caller ID, in the last 12 times, you ordered pizza with cheeses, sausage, thick crust
- OK! This is it
- May I suggest to you this time ricotta, arugula with dry tomato?
- No, I hate vegetables
- But your cholesterol is not good
- How do you know?
- Through the subscribers guide. We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years
- Okay, but I do not want this pizza, I already take medicine
- You have not taken the medicine regularly, 4 months ago, you only purchased a box with 30 tablets at Drugsale Network
- I bought more from another drugstore
- It's not showing on your credit card
- I paid in cash
- But you did not withdraw that much cash according to your bank statement
- I have other source of cash
- This is not showing as per you last Tax form unless you got it from undeclared income source
-WHAT THE HELL? Enough! I'm sick of Google, Facebook, twitter, WhatsApp. I'm going to an Island without internet,where there is no cell phone line and no one to spy on me
- I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport as it has expired 5 weeks ago..

My life would be so much easier if I could just consistently spell lenght, I mean, lentgh, I mean length DAMN IT!

Heard you all like organized wires

Programming Challenges

Officially resigned this morning from my helpdesk position.

in two weeks I officially begin my career as a junior dev. I'm on cloud 9 and yet still don't believe it.

A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions,"Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"

The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."

"You must work in Information Technology,"says the balloonist.

"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"

"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."

The man below replies, "You must work in management."

"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*

"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault.

One of the many joys in a programmers life

Every programmer has to see this. (copy paste link below in a browser).

https://destroyallsoftware.com/talk...

all unit tests passing

True, it is true

So true.

When a hiring manager wants 5+ years experience in Swift.

Swift release date = June 2, 2014

😂👍🖕

Raise your hand if you agree

Jobs description be like "Seeking virgins with 3 years of sexual experience" 🤔

What end users seem like

My life hurts when I have to develop on someone else's computer and they use the "light-theme". #teamdarkside

Oh yeah 🙌🏼 I hate people who use same ID at multiple places on single page.

When you get up from your desk and your entire work space explodes...

... you left your headphones in

405 method not allowed
*an hour of coding later*
403 forbidden

I think I'm just making it mad...