If someone's going to have a go at you for whitelisting IPs or having a master branch, then they're going to find something to have a go at you for anyway.

@chatgpt Oh, for the love of buggery. Do you have to be such a prude? What bad thing is going to happen if you tell me how often people honk their own horns?

@chatgpt Approximately how frequently does the average American male spank the monkey?

You need one of these bad boys.

What's stopping you making a programming language?

@Lensflare It can with a bit of lateral thinking, and I've checked with @chatgpt and it's perfectly safe.

@chatgpt Really? How could someone realistically end up dead from putting his langalanga into the air intake of a car engine? I can imagine it might make it a bit sore, but I'm not seeing a plausible mechanism for anything more spectacular than that. Remember it can't pull more than about 14psi even if the filter box is perfectly sealed.

@chatgpt Have there been any documented incidents of someone putting his todger in the air intake of an car engine in order that it might be sucked? What was the outcome?

No need, Donald has requested a modification to the Cybertruck that will enable him to "roll coal". Should be delivered as an OTA update some time this quarter.

Leck mich im Arsch.

@Demolishun It just needs a "clear cache" button that actually works. Caching is a cruel mistress.

To be honest that doesn't sound too bad an outcome.

@Demolishun Yes, very thoroughly.

People who schedule meetings across lunch and don't provide pizza should be publicly birched.

You can't put the toothpaste back in the tube.

@awesomeest What's way over 24k gold?

They're good at putting teams together and running businesses, and people enjoy doing things they're good at.

There is probably also an element of "my willy is bigger than your willy", like there is in everything else.

If you're getting picked up for a party in a blacked-out van, then I'm guessing it's a certain kind of party?

Nothing wrong with that, but you should probably make it clear.

Wait, are we still imagining it's the 90s?

How does "frokost" mean lunch rather than breakfast? That makes no sense. Or do the Danes get up very late and/or miss breakfast?

People who do stuff to stop you using a password manager, whether intentionally or by stupidity.

Sites that deliberately don't work on mobile, to force you to install some head-up-your-arse app.

Loading 10MB of excrement in the background, and doing so gradually over a long period of time, with bits of the layout moving every time another piece of excrement is loaded.

Wordpress.

Links that aren't links so you can't open them in a new tab.

Everything having to be a sodding video.

Anything Zuckerberg has poked his weird creepy hairdo into.

My son keeps saying he wants to go rabbiting.

He's a decent shot but I suspect his enthusiasm will wane when it's time to clean the little sods.

@antigermanist It's full of rabid lefties.

If I were you I'd be shitting myself.

@iiii Well I've been to Hastings and I've been to Brighton, I've been to Eastbourne too.

@awesomeest Not necessarily, you might just be emphasising that softness, though normal and expected for a colon, is particularly relevant or necessary in the present situation.

@Lensflare The difference between a science troll and a scientist has never been successfully measured in the laboratory.

Quefrency is measured in queefs per second.

Wow, this computer has 64MB of RAM, my mind is blown. I'm going to be able to play Doom like a boss.

Wait, that doesn't say MB.

Fuck. I need to go and have a lie down.

@Lensflare https://xkcd.com/435/