!dev but fuck it.

Why do I al-fucking-ways try to stay nice to everyone? I don't want to 'hurt' anyone.

I fucking hate that about myself. 😡

Me too. My significant other always tells me to recognize people smartly but duh. I always think everybody's nice and I stay nice with them in return but it usually backfires. Hate it.

@SheShell Sometimes I just want to loose my shit on someone but I can't. I always fucking stay nice.

@Alice I fucking wish I could do that 😞

It's easier online. Try saying what's on your mind online to practice.
IRL you would never imagine me saying the things I say online. (Like the whole drama thing from earlier.)

And then later go curse yourself in a corner? I swear I always end up cursing myself for not saying stuff or saying anything hurtful if at all I do @linuxxx

@SheShell Yes 😞

Teach me @Alice

@Alice
That's actually a really good thing. IRL I'm a total doormat!

Oh, Michelle. Can I have your lunch?
Uhh, okay...

Oh, Michelle. Can I copy your homework?
But I... Okay...

Oh, Michelle. Can you go do this thing for me?
Okay...

It's like my body can't physically say no. But online, I'm a bit better. I can be more assertive.

@Alice
That's sexual harassment. Can't you report them? :c

Same. It rally limits what I can tell other people. It’s sometimes even depressing.

The solution is to assume everyone is out to use you until proved otherwise. Do not be afraid to react rudely to any remotely weird behavior. If they really mean no harm, firstly they will be very careful and kind with you, second they will understand it if by accident they had a behavior that caused a reaction from you and they will recognize it. Rule of thumb.

@IllSlapU
Unfortunately he didn't throw it hard enough to kill me. I'm sure that would have pleased you.

I think that people that are naturally nice are a blessing. Specially to peoppe like me. I lose my faith in people on a daily basis. And whenever I feel like there is no hope I talk to my best bro, who is a naturally good and kind human being. So maybe there is someone out there that feels the same towards you.

Needless to say, people try to take advantage of my boy all the time. Which is fine since I am violent as fuck and love screaming at motherfuckers.

@IllSlapU
Someone just warned me that I'm doing it again.
I'm probably saying weird things again, so if I am, tell me and I'll stop.

I get like this when I'm sleep deprived. Like extremely sleep deprived, so I'm not completely aware of what I'm saying... Keep that in mind.

Today I've been targetting you because frankly, your personality is rude and inconsiderate.
But remember, you have a voice to tell me to stop. I'll probably regret it all tomorrow when I'm well rested.

@Condor
Even dfox didn't approve of his behavior.

@Condor
Do you really want me to show the screenshot? It's funny how easily you can trick people into trustitng you just by upvoting their stuff.

@linuxxx that's a very useful quality if you use it correctly. people expect you to be nice, so if you're really angry and say something even remotely mean, it will leave a deep impact and you have more power without crossing any lines.
@Michelle tbh if youre sleep deprived, go sleep, dont rant. don't expect people to excuse you.

I have the same issue and after analyzing for years and concluded that I will never be able to change myself about it. So now I just embrace it. Whatever the outcome be, I try to be nice.

Oh but I'm not a monk or anything. So there are times I get angry and need to sort shits out with people as well. Again I just do it in a nice way.

@marthulu
I never asked anyone to exuse me. I seriously can't believe people are taking his side.
If this is how it's going to be, then I'm done with devRant for a while. A long while.

its a very good thing ! dont give up you're awesome !

@AlexDeLarge well that itself is a quality as well. I am a very chill dude and can talk to anyone. Does not mean I cannot detect bullshit. There is a difference between being authentic and honest and being an arrogant prick man :P

@AlexDeLarge haha yeah man in my case this dude is a gentle giant. He is tall and muscular, I am tiny and built but he will not throw a punch even if his life depends on him. And i have yet to see him scream or raise his voice and I have known him since we were 6. I would like to see you lose your shit, i remember that pic of yourself, you look like an intimidating dude that is for sure.

@Michelle Just for the record, I'm on 'your' side of this.

@Michelle no clue what happened from before 0__o but don't leave

Same. I also crave people's acceptance even though I hate people, am constantly thinking I am bothering people, and simultaneously want and don't want a romantic relationship.

I think you and I were drinking from the same cup.

@linuxxx hey that's actually a really great trait to have and you shouldn't hate that about yourself. Why? Well for one the fact that you restrain yourself shows self control and patients which are good personality traits. Second, showing a gentle and nice mentality will eventually keep good hard working people around because you add positivity to the environment. Third, you don't waste time getting angry, but instead focus more on what matters and that's the work that's ahead of you that's suppose to keep your mind busy and give you purpose; not fighting for pride or out of frustration. Fourth, you can use that tolerance for your significant other or family if you decide to have one and that could give you more leverage for building stronger relationships even if you don't quite understand them (your kids when they're young or your significant others mentality at times) and that will give you more insight instead of letting anger blind you.

This of course is coming from a guy who just yesterday broke his glasses by throwing them against the wall out of anger and frustration. I am trying to practice what I preach. (: Wish you the best!

Could be worse. Idgaf and I'm going to die alone. Seems to middle ground. Be used by everyone because you're nice or be an asshole alone.

@Michelle I'm not taking anyone's side, I don't even know what this is about. all i see is you posting strange comments.
You literally said "I'm not completely aware of what I'm saying, keep that in mind". Also "tell me if I'm saying weird things, I'll stop". and so I did.
Grow a pair and learn to not take offense, it's difficult, but you'll feel better and be seen as less weak.

@Michelle what happened? I missed it

I always speak my mind and people call me rude and harsh. But people who know me love it, because they can ask me for an opinion that's always honest.

@marthulu @DjSall She kinda snapped at someone on here and sir dfox backed her up!

@Condor If you don't attack that person or anything I'll share it, I don't want to start a war!

@linuxxx _/\_ pls lol *curiosity is killing me!!!*

@dalastTomCruise https://devrant.com/rants/1120467/...

Don't fuck me right now by starting some war please 😅

@linuxxx that wasn't too bad... although it is strange yet cool to see one of the creators of this app so engaged with its users. This is why devRant is top notched! Most would've been banned by now haha.

@Condor organization part: help 😅😋

@michelle No need to be offended about people taking @illslapu's side in this rant. What happened before is not apparent from the comments here and without @linuxxx's link I'd be confused about how to interprete all this as well.

But since I've been looking at the linked rant I can totally understand your anger and your reaction here. You shouldn't judge anyone for not knowing the whole story. ;)

@linuxxx
Thank you for explaining everything to the others and remaining on my side. I was furious so I left devRant for about 24 hours so I can cool down a bit. :)

I like to think that people by default are good and trying to be nice to others, but every (inter)action may change that a bit in favour of negativity, pessimism, and bitterness — I believe that most of it is basically the results of misunderstanding and blind and deaf disagreement, rather than anger and hostility, especially when it comes to strangers and other new people :)
If I find myself using bad words I try not to send them to anyone and work on a more neutral way of saying what I want, if nothing else just to make it harder to dismiss it as a personal attack, just like I think no argument can really be 'won' by going personal...

Also I don't really believe in sides, just mis- or matching view points and oppinions in the current area of discussion, and maybe a bias based on previous mis- or matching ;)

I'm not sure if it's a Danish, introvert, passive aggressive, or whatever thing, but if I really can't help being negatively personal it usually takes a bit more vague form, e.g.:
"You talk very much but say very little"
"You should really appreciate the friends you already have"
"You seem to have stopped discussing and I don't want to argue"
"Let me know when you're ready to be constructive again :)"