5
jestdotty
109d

think I had my first burnout

so exciting

I couldn't sleep last night and obsessively worked all day. couldn't pay attention during dinner / relaxing before sleep with people. everyone went to bed, I didn't. ended up getting up and working then trying to sleep, repeat, like 6 times. morning came, neighbours running saws and shit, eventually slept 2 hours then 1.5 hours, if even. then worked more. good morning. fuckit. then got really pissed at everything for like 4 hours and wanted to be left alone any time a person got close to me, BUT KEPT WORKING, stressing. until I realized holy shit I'm fucking miserable

now I think I'm crashing

IM SO EXCITED. I've never been so obsessed about my own incompetence at something before. I've never had this. this leads me to believe all burnout is due to people trying to fight their incompetence maybe?
people always tell me I work too much and all that but I never understood cuz I like it. maybe this is what they meant though. in which case I'm mad at all of them for incorrectly identifying my emotional state in the past grrrrr. cuz they'd use that as an excuse to rope me into doing things I didn't even find enjoyable because supposedly it was "good for me" but I thought it was fucking lame. fucking hell

Comments
  • 7
    I don't think it's a burnout. Also six days is not much.

    Before, i liked working 24/7 too but that's in good times. When everything goes right - it's doable. It even gives energy. But when it goes wrong - you raised the bar of expectation quite high for yourself. My regex parser was making me a bit crazy too. Fundamental issues stood coming. Now i decided if I do minimal one per day (the issues are always quite hard, tested well, with much tests) it'll be fine too. Why regex has many flavours became very clear to me. There's one thing i know it doesn't validate and i won't fix it. It's stupid and would rape the application. It's validating "pppp" with `p*ppp`. There are other ways to write that p*p{3,} works. Makes more sense. It does validate "ppp" with p*p tho. And that was technically already quite a thing. I can talk endless about regex validation. Regex is a kinda CSS

    Hint: I don't know anyone who uses malloc and experienced a burnout. Just sayin'
  • 1
    good.
  • 1
    @retoor while it could be an acute stress event, typical signs of chronic or cumulative workplace stress (burnout) include sleeping problems, isolation, irritability, mood swings, etc…
  • 0
    The cause for burnout is where a person experiences constant stressors, yet is unable to cope with the amount of constant stress.

    Think of a garden where weeds grow every day. In order to keep a healthy garden, you must pull weeds every day. If you have the garden the size of 1000 acres, chances you won’t be able to pull all those weeds every day. Whether you unintentionally or intentionally let weeds take over your garden, the garden will slowly die, AND it’s going to be harder to pull all the weeds the more you don’t get around to it.
  • 1
    If you are EXITED, you don’t have burnout.
  • 1
  • 1
    Haven't read all comments, but I think generally what's called burnout is when you _can't_ work or do things you usually like doing. You lose all motivation. Mental block. That's how it's been for me at least.
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