60
Root
15d

I need a vacation.
I’m horribly depressed and burned out, every day for months has been a little harder than the last, and really doing anything at all is a monumental challenge, work or otherwise. Let alone working on the fucking screwdriver.

I told my boss last night and requested time off.

His response?
> Oh no, but the new screwdriver! We were all really really hoping to get it out by the end of the month!

I’m a crumpled wreck and all you care about is the fucking screwdriver that PRACTICALLY NOBODY WILL FUCKING USE? Seriously dude, go to hell.

Comments
  • 23
    I’m putting in for time off anyway.

    I also talked to HR about it and asked for advice and resources. That should help protect me from management if anything goes poorly.
  • 3
    Well I feel like if you don't get it you should probably just quit, or something, because if you continue it sounds like it could have serious long time health implications
  • 5
    @Root take all the time you need.

    I wish the topic wasn't so "taboo".

    The math is simple: the losses of 6 weeks of recovery and then slowly starting by e.g. working part time - is nothing compared to loosing someone's knowledge who's been working on a project for the same amount of time. The longer someone worked at as company the less replaceable he is...

    Management might want to tell the story differently, but at least the good managers are well aware of it.

    Sadly. Sadly. Very sadly. Management doesn't require courses in dealing with the taboo topics. :(
  • 1
    @IntrusionCM Six weeks and slowly rejoining sounds about right.

    I’ll be lucky to get two weeks, separated by several weeks of work. And complaints that I’m not being productive enough.
  • 2
    @Root gngnrhrhehhsbdhshebsbsbsbsbbbnsnjes!

    *gooozfraba*

    Yeah. And this helps nothing at all.

    It will only worsen the situation.
  • 4
    Fucking managers, people in general are totally unaware that the brain gets tired as well. If he keeps driving you through the ground your performance is only going to get worse
  • 4
    @Root Talk to whoever is necessary. Sometimes a two- three week leave is the most productive and healthy way ahead. Burnouts are serious in this business. I have worked with two guys - separate jobs - who burt out in a way that they left the imdustry completely. They both spent some time in the hospital, then just couldn't cope with stress anymore.
    It truelly is not worth it. Not for you or for the employer. If you snap you'll be gone for much longer.
    You should not feel bad to take care of yourself first.
  • 8
    Et tu?
    Not sure if it's an option from where you are, but here you can actually go on sick leave if burned out..

    I was hospitalised once, they had to confiscate my phone and they restricted my access to comunity computer because I was still checking work emails non stop... I do not wanna go down that road again..
  • 3
    @AtuM I burned out from the game industry like that. It’s quite literally why I’m a web dev now.

    I couldn’t take the never-ending impossible deadlines, the crunch (insane overtime), the shit from management and execs, the shit from players, etc. I love game dev so much, but there’s no way I can return.

    Maybe some indie studio, someday.
  • 3
    Maybe he can shove the screwdriver up his ass for the meantime. Let his filthy nether mouth warm it up while you're on vacation. Bosses like this make my blood boil. It's as if you don't have rights or those benefits were just given to you for display and you cannot use them. "You have X number of paid vacation. You can file them but we'll make you feel like shit for doing that."

    I hope you enjoy your vacation and do it more frequently. There's no way that shithead can replace you and even if he does, you have other sources of income and all he has is an unfinished screwdriver anal plug.
  • 1
    @Root So can you feel when another burnout is comming? So to stop before it's too late again.
    There are easier and better paid jobs around. Managers should be sensitive to these situations. If the screwdriver is so important, have more people working on it. It's very simple. Replacing a really good dev is neither simple nor easy.
  • 0
    I’ve had managers that have pushed me through times like this to deliver. They were good folks, just also under pressure from high on up as well. A good manager would at least let you know that you’re going to get some time off soon, and to also let you take some half days while you get there. Don’t underestimate the power of a half day Friday. Yes, you need more time off than that to recharge, but a little refresher like an early start to the weekend can work wonders.
  • 2
    @fiftyhz A half day once a week might have helped several months ago.

    Two months ago a normal 8-9 hour day felt like a half day. This week... I’m not even here anymore, let alone productive.

    Half an hour’s effort last year is two days’ worth of trying to work today.
  • 2
    I feel your pain. I'm in same boat really. Was gonna put time off in after last screwdriver but then got new screwdriver with hard deadline very next day. I guess they didnt see 8n paycom where i submitted time off 2 weeks in advance. So i cancelled it. Just got request for performance review this week. They probably noticed my work not being on par lately.

    I need to do what you are doing just confront it and tell them i need time off.

    You are an inspiration even in dark times.
  • 3
    @Root

    Yeah. Cause your body is quite literally kept in a state of stress.

    Hence the 6 weeks rule. If it's not working at all, get 6 weeks off. Here in Germany it's not so much a problem as an doctor can declare you unable to work.

    Still the route is dangerous as an absence for more than 2 weeks rings all kinds of alarm bells.... (Speaking from experience...) Leading to a lot of unpleasant discussions especially due to the fact that you can't be fired here in Germany. (Which is a good thing, except some managers then try to "outsmart" the law system... you can guess what I mean I think - you're nicely forced out, lawful evil in RPG games).

    And even here, getting a psychiatrist is russian roulette. Which I'd highly recommend, cause taking away the stress usually leads to a lot of other problems, sadly.

    Very honest here: better jobless then struggling with recovery for years.

    That's one experience from my life I wish noone.
  • 2
    I've had this problem too... and man does it suck. What really helped me was getting out in nature. And this is coming from someone who would rather sit at my desk all day lol
  • 1
    Just talked to my boss. I was really afraid to given the amount of work piling up. But he said after this screwdriver goes live which is mid april i can schedule off. So I am taking a week and going to rent cabin in Yosemite or somewhere in Sierras.

    Hearing your story made me realize I really need this.

    I hope you are able to recover and get back on track. Good luck @root
  • 0
    @IntrusionCM forces out means they reassign to some mind numbing boring job so you have to find a new one just so u can keep ur skills up to date and feel useful?

    Guess that works... If you can't wfh.

    My bro sorta doing... But just play games all day during work hours...

    Sorta like Wally.
  • 1
    @Root just remember HR protects the company, not the employees.
  • 2
    @mundo03 So very well aware.
    Calculated risk and hedge.
  • 1
    @donuts nope.

    In my case I got the clients from hell.

    And everything else that was labeled "doomed to fail".
  • 0
    @IntrusionCM if you can’t get fire your employees in Germany, can you resort to not paying them 👹? Lol. That would be my approach
  • 0
    ...Continued (devRants stupid posting rules strike again) I’ll give out a final severance as their last payment
  • 1
    Literally most of the bosses act this way...
  • 0
    Same here
  • 0
    RELATABLE
  • 1
    Put yourself first. A healthy mum is a happy mum who can raise happy children. I know coz my mum was depressed all through my childhood
  • 1
    @witchDev I’m trying ...
  • 1
    @Root I am ROOT-ING for you 💕
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