Explain me like I'm five (in one sentence) : What does a developer do ?

Develop. Jk. Someone who writes software for a living

Some crazy mofo that writes code, attends meetings, produces software of some kind, attends meetings, deals with useless questions, attends meetings, does agile - sort off, attends meetings, writes code, did I mention the meetings and somewhere in all that finds time to complete a task and deploy it through to production via multi test environments and potential code reviews (depending on business/company) oh and yea there’s more meetings if you achieve that.

Some one who fixes that which should be doing as intended.

@C0D4 that may be a single sentence, but it's definitely not one a 5-yr-old would have the patience to read :p

@svgPhoenix oh, I’ll revise it into steps instead:

- takes next ticket/issue/feature from list
- writes code
- attends meetings
- gets written code through debugger
- then testing environment
- then user testing is done (a sample set of users come and break it)
- code more for scope creep and found issues
- goto: 4
- meetings
- meetings
- more ducking meetings
- meetings to talk about setting up more meetings (this is a thing 😓)
- deploy to prod
- more ducking meetings
- alcohol
- goto: 1

Otherwise: we do a lot of nothing and slowly get things done.

@C0D4 you've got some unreachable code there friend

someone who makes computers programs (do whatever they want)

I make computer beep boop beep beep boop.

I make allll the lights on the computer change just how I want them to. 😊

A developer is a person who has a whole buncha cans of Play Doh, takes it all out, mushes it all together into a big mess for hours until, somehow, out of nowhere, a perfectly-formed unicorn appears - a unicorn that unfortunately can't gallop until the developer has massaged it a bunch more in seemingly random ways until it can move.

Tangential: I was once fixing a computer at the daycare center my wife worked at (I'm a developer, but I'm also A+ certified and know my way around hardware very well). A bunch of kids, 4-5 or so, were standing around watching me. One of them finally walks up to me, taps me on the shoulder, and shyly asks: "Mister, are you a computer biologist?"

It's one of the funniest things I've ever experience thanks to my career.

Drinks coffee.

If you cannot understand it without an explanation, you cannot understand it with an explanation.

@thevariableman Tell me, what is paleoichthyology?

"If you cannot understand it without an explanation, you cannot understand it with an explanation." Right?

Well, it's the study of fish fossils.
Did you understand that?

Think code sleep repeat .

Someone who fixes your grandma's internet because the LAN was plugged out.

Explain me like I'm three. Why do you ask?

@cursee Only to know the best answer 'cause a lot of people ask me this quesion. That's kind of magic for so many people.

@Wesley we provide solutions in digital format.

Someone want to sell something on internet, we provide necessary solutions for them to be able to sell products on internet.

Someone want to share cat photos to the world on internet, we provide solutions for that.

Someone want to receive a monthly report of their businesses on their digital devices, we provide solutions for that.

Someone want to reduce human errors and manual labours and paperwork at their office, we provide solutions for that.

Teaching computers to make magic

@Root if you are familiar with programing no one needs to tell you like you're 5 what to do. If you haven't seen anyone code, like most 5 year olds then there no point in trying to do it.

Archeology: development::paleoithyology:struts framework

Some one probably needs to explain what struts does.