For all us older web devs....

I don’t normally post jokes/memes but this needed sharing.

When your week has been so busy and exhausting you remember at 1PM Friday you have a deadline for Monday morning and force yourself to do a weeks worth of work in 4 hours and deploy it on a Friday without QA testing!

To future me - I apologise for Monday’s headaches.

That feeling you get when you run

$ php tvVolUp.php

And the god damn tv’s volume goes up a level 😆

Now to clean the shit out of the chaotic mess I just made and make it work from a Rpi which I’ll then add to my voice activated list for my google home.

Coz you know voice activated TV remote in PHP 😍

So ive been messing around with my Google Home.. because having a voice activated weather station is cool and all, but as a developer it needs to be useful no?... and Raspberry Pi, cause you know, we cool kids have those sitting around doing nothing useful.

But back on track, getting these two to actually work together, and that almighty moment you can say "Hey Google, Deploy Project -X- to the Pi" and the Rpi just kicks into gear and pulls down the latest master branch from Gitlab for the correct project is mind boggling.

No more ssh + sudo git pull !!!

Disclaimer: i didn't pay for that Google Home, but its in my house, listening to my TV, so i may as well use the damn thing.

That moment you work out how to get Google Home to make webhook calls, setup a Rpi to accept incoming https requests, and can’t think of anything to actually make it do

Ideas welcome 😂😂

Just when you think you had seen all the GDPR emails and this whole spam fest was over but no... not at all, some asshole has to be late to the party.

What could possibly go wrong?
A quick backup later should be suffice 😅

When you forgot to escape characters in regex and wonder why the fuck it’s not working for 2 hours. 😖

Why regex must you be a living hell!

WHAT THE FLYING FUCK WINDOWS???

You change the icon for the multi desktop button... ok fine,
*clicks*
son of a bitch now contains Bing Ads

Fuck you Windows, and Fuck me for not being able to find a linux distro that will fucking boot after install correctly, and FUCK you acer for not having linux support.

Pressing that “deploy to production” button when it usually consists of multiple projects and databases updating at once.

Maybe I should look at separating them one year.

CSS Opinion Time!!

With VueJS which css framework do you guys typically use?

Linux is great they said
Linux works well they said
Linux is totally awesome they said

- - -
4 live cds
(Ubuntu, mint, Debian, Antergos)
3 wouldn’t boot beyond splash screens or even into setup.

no fucking keyboard
No fucking wifi
No fucking trackpad

Now I’m sitting here with Antergos, with a USB keyboard, USB mouse and an ethernet cable plugged into my laptop 🤷‍♂️

Good news... I think I might be getting through the hard parts

I keep wondering if there’s a case of someone stealing another’s rant. And what the other person would say to the thief.

“You stole my rant” or “That was suppose to be my rant” or something along that line.

😅

On tonight’s episode of “Who’s that Avatar” I leave Yu, Mi!

https://youtube.com/watch/...

Due to inspiration of giving up with windows being slow (performance wise) always connecting to MS severs (I have slow internet) so it’s noticeable when I can download quicker on a raspberry pi then on a laptop - both over wifi 🤷‍♂️

And burning a fucking boot DVD for Ubuntu takes 3 fucking DVDs at 2.4x speed - before getting a successful boot disk 😞

I think it’s time to swap out this hdd and go to the dark side!

Hey devBanner guys..i forget who handles the project

@kimmax and @CozyPlanes come to mind?

question: why block \r\n ect, when i can still insert new lines?

With Gitlab becoming the new norm for repos', given the Github acquisition and all. i thought i would check out the Gitlab plugins for vsCode, and i was not let down.

Triggering pipelines from inside vsCode is going to be freeeaking awesome sauce.

For the Gitlab converts:
https://gitlab.com/fatihacet/...

Security Ads?

sooo... apparerntly, proved by this, adding "security" to a rant adds and ad in the webApp

- - -
This was a test rant
Follow the story here: https://devrant.com/rants/1467574/...

That weird and uncomfortable feeling you get when trawling through analytic data only to realise your top 5 browsers are in order:

Google Chrome
iOS Safari
IE11
Edge
Firefox

I think I need to go back to testing things in IE again 😫

!Github
!GDPR
!!YAY

So time for a new bandwagon...

Apple and it’s new iOS12
Thoughts, theories, loves, hates....
let em looose!!

https://apple.com/ios/...

A rant to end all rants
Microsoft is buying github.

Deal with it!

https://blogs.microsoft.com/blog/...

In other news:
Apple has there WWDC in less then 24 hours, where’s the hate on Apple now?

Just to add to the chrome memory wastage.
Chrome out consumes everything else running, and Virtual box has a full blown LAMP server running.

Who says Windows is useless....

Running a python script to swap wifi networks, auto connect to VPN servers, run SSH commands and SFTP files to servers, downloading numerous files, sifting through outlook for emails, running excel macros for data cleansing, cell merging and formulas all at the click of a button 😱

Oh yea.. this is all 1 task that I never have to do again😂

Windows is useless for development you say? 🤔

So I’m looking at a senior dev role, and wondering what kind of coding challenges to expect, what have some of you more senior devs had to face in the past?

You lousy fucking test class of an ass wipe,

TLDR; it fails and it passes all at the same time.

So during a deployment, one of the pre-deployment test classes fails, not something anyone has worked on so figured I run it manually to see what’s going on, but no the shit of a thing passed second time around.

Now because we can’t deploy without 100% of the test classes passing so I have to organise another deployment which it fails again. Fuck this,

Unprotects master

Git checkout master
Git merge dev
Git push master -f

Protects master

Skrew this!

Well would you look at that, it works now 😰

This one, is for all you haters out there tonight!
.
.
.
.

Cause I'm PHP, I'm dynamite
PHP and I'll win the fight
PHP. I'm a power load
PHP, watch me explode()
I'm dirty, mean and mighty unclean
I'm a wanted code
Public enemy number one
Understand

!rant
Question time for you very few Salesforce devs out there, yea I know there’s some.

Seeing as Google is not my friend today, I’m trying to get SOQL to return null valued fields back to a rest api, something this hunk of shit won’t do, and short of looping back through all the records and injecting these fields back in, I’m at a loss... any advise is welcome 🤯

i think ive been waiting a while too long today :(

who ever has this as their skill set are legends!!
made me laugh going through thousands of lines of skills :D
"
A little bit of Lua in my life
A little bit of JS is all i need
A little bit of bash is what i see
A little bit of JSON in the sun
A little bit of Python all night long
A little bit of TCL here i am
A little bit of this makes me your dev
"

Tried installing docker on windows today (for an experiment) and after it finally installs and goes to start up i get the hyper-v required, installing will prevent virtualbox from working.

Yea... FUCK NO! There goes that idea 😡