*computer fell, broken in pieces*

Me calling [Microsoft] tech support: hey can you check my warranty on this computer, I think I broke it?

Tech support: yes sir but we must first go through the troubleshooting steps,

Me: no, no I just-

Tech support: have you tried pressing F8 sir?

Me: umm… no, look I'm just -

Tech support: sir please press the F8 key sir

Me: okay… I pressed it, now can you just check my-

Tech support: sir please what happened when you pressed F8?

Me: it's broken, now if you could just check my warranty -

Tech support: sir I'm sorry sir I think you did it wrong. Please press F8

Me: no just check my-

Tech support: sir I think you do not understand, sir it is at the top-


  • 69
    I think there should be a security word or phrase like potatoes​ or Narnia that automatically skips all those steps. I understand many people might need them since often many problems can be solved by reinstalling / recovering but for those who already understand how computers work is infuriating.
  • 18
    @Kalvin narnia seems alright to me
  • 130
    @Kalvin you're not alone...
  • 16
    Thank fuck i pay 5 euros a month extra to get a service provider which has every system on their end redundant. (And proud of it) and has a motto for costumer service that they do not hang up until the issue is resolved or a mechanic is on their way to do so.

    As a result, they have all knowledgeable staff that do have these losts. But if i go: ok i tried all i know regarding resets and such. This and this is what is wrong, it is not my end, can you check yours. They never turned down my request and it was always solved within 5 minutes of calling.

  • 24
    Press f8 to pay respects
  • 18
    The security sentence is "let me talk with tier 2"
    If that fails just ask for a Manager.
  • 21
    @redundandundant This accomplishes the rule that there is ALWAYS a relevant XKCD comic.
  • 1
    @Bacontaskmaster The more you spend, the less you pay.
  • 10
    The tech was probably pissed at his stupid user that cant even follow simple dorections to press f8
  • 0
    If I got a call and they just kept repeating "I think I broke it, can you check my warranty?", I'd assume them to be a typical user that doesn't know what they're talking about...
  • 2
    @Kalvin there should be a 'Rule 34' equivalent for programming jokes and xkcd
  • 1
    @Kalvin is there a relevant xkcd comic about there always being a relevant xkcd comic?
  • 2
    @brettmoan probably not, but there is a XKCD comic talking about itself: https://xkcd.com/688
  • 1
    I work for a corporation which has it support based in another country, with a 6 day response time... They also run through the absolute basics every time, even when I'm asking them to whitelist a new server on our network or resetting my password. Wrote a script of my own to counter everything they say 😂
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