Story of onboarding in the age of Corona!

Office is big but almost empty, people are working from home. Guy welcoming me says he is not the one supposed to help me(he is sick I'm told) and the rest of the team is not there. The man I'm talking to is this other guys boss. It's OK I think it will work out.

Turns out this guy helping me is actually the CTO so he does not have that much time on his hands. He shows me were to get my computer and desk and hands me documentation to setup some software.

I spend the time before lunch installing linux, setting up git and some other software. CTO checks up on me once.

Then after lunch nothing...I look for him but he is in some meeting. I find some videos by myself labled "onboarding" on the company website. They are OK. I ask my deskmate if he heard what team I will be in. He doesn't know. I sneak out a little early since I have nothing left to do.

The CTO is now also sick I see in an email when I arrive at the office. Still don't know what team I am in.

I spend the morning reading coding blogs and websites. After lunch I have a meeting. The only one in my calendar. It's about the product software architecture for all new employees. It's good but still no news about what team. I aimlessly read up on some software architecture untill I go home.

I arrive at the office first, only the receptionist is there. I listen to podcasts until a few more people show up. I ask another guy if he knows what team I'm supposed to be in. He doesn't but laughs and says it was the same when he started last year.

I send out messages on slack looking for anyone that knows...still no one knows. I guess Im in limbo now. Perhaps i should just start making coffee for people or something...

  • 5
    Well, that’s off to a great start.
  • 2
    So you have slack ?
    Why not ask if anyone needs help with testing or something ?
    Best way to impress is to be pro-active.
    But you can also wait and play random web-games. Nobody seems to care for now...
  • 5
    @Grumm hahhahahahahahha, volunteering for testing? No. Don’t be workplace simp.
  • 9
    Good news! I finally was refered to someone with some pull. He had to write all the other project leaders and they assigned me to the team they "reasonably suspect" I'm supposed to be in...maybe. No-one knows for sure until the CTO is back.
  • 0
    I would try and see who is available that is working on stuff and if they have time to answer questions.

    This post sounds so much like movies where the end of the world happened and everyone is gone.
  • 0
    That's a horrible experience :/

    I can imagine that a lot of companies aren't still used to be fully remote mode and onboarding will always be a hassle for new joiners
  • 10
    i was looking forward to "dear diary. it's been 3 years since I started working here. they still haven't figured out what team i should be in, and it seems they forgot they should be trying to find out. i spend my days listening to podcasts, having 3hour lunches, and wondering if it would seem weird to remind them i'm still collecting salary from them. i fear they would accuse me of theft and tresspassing if i made them notice me. "
  • 2
    @Midnight-shcode Hahah yeah I had kinda the same scenario in mind tbh.

    I honestly think that if something serious had happned to the CTO there I could have just faked my way through working there if that would have been something I wanted
  • 3
    @Midnight-shcode or the others devs who are starting to wonder who this guy is and why is he at the office everyday.

    Free food ?

    Everybody is to afraid to ask questions.

    Bets are starting to popup on what his job is or in what team he is.

    Nobody wins, nobody knows...

    *dramatic theme song playing*
  • 2
    @Grumm heh, he should leave fight club flyers in the copier.
  • 3
    Also onboarded recently, but this sounds far worse than my experience.

    Though my work laptop is $#%! I'm still waiting for replacement 😔

    Good luck, hope the cto gets better soon
  • 2
    My first week at my current company, back in 2011 they gave me an empty desk without a computer, and told me to wait for one.
    I did, for a whole week. Came to work, read some books, talking with colleagues, etc
    Computer arrived Monday morning and then I could start working
  • 2
    @G4nin0 sounds like if that keeps going on and no one knows anything and you fly under the radar with no responsibilities it would be a great set up for the plot of a Seinfeld episode
  • 0
    @kurast That is honestly just terrible would be kinda mad if someone purposly made me spend that much time in the office with litteraly zero things to do.
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