29
Cukes-
8y

Disclaimer: this rant has nothing to do with programming, but I'm a dev and need to rant. My 11 year old sister joined the illuminati. Yeah you heard that right. Let's start.

I wake up to 8 missed calls from my mom. I call her back and she asks how to reset a Gmail password, I tell her and nonchalantly joke about her being forgetful. She then says "it's because your sister joined the illuminati". I take a step back. Did I hear that right?!

Much to my surprise, I did. Turns out some girl at her school said that a demon named Penny would visit her while she slept and kill her, unless my sister joined the illuminati. I thought the whole point of that group is to be secretive, but whatever. Props to my sister for finding the website and figuring out how to sign up, although it's not that hard.

My sister is so scared now that she has to meet up with a priest every week to protect her from demons. My mom is meeting with school administration to find out what to do about these threats, and also to find out how the illuminati got involved. You can't make this stuff up. I'm now tasked with getting back into her Gmail, iPad, and Google hangouts account to retrieve the messages she has been receiving from her bully. Immediately after the phone call, I walked into the elevator on my floor and someone had taped up the illuminati sign. What an interesting day I've had.

Comments
  • 0
    @finenthusiastic welcome to devRant!
  • 1
    Nah you shouldnt worry too much unless she angers us, the molag bal cultists
  • 0
    This was a 🙄 moment for me
  • 0
    So, what... Is she a cabbage or something?
  • 2
    Deeemmmooonnsss man. Those shits are no joke, I'll keep your sister, you and family in my prayers. God and Jesus helped me through and stopped the demon/entity encounters I was going through every night.

    I would totally suggest for you to accept Jesus Christ in your heart as your Lord and Savior if you haven't already, demons don't like people meddling in their affairs. Seek God just believing is the first step but isn't enough, James 2:19. God Bless you all and feel free to message me if you need anything 😇🕆
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