Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
-
I think you need more help than you are going to get on here. To start with you need to start loving yourself, if you don’t and try to get that elsewhere you will only get rejected as you come across as needy and hard work. Seek professional help and it will change your life. There is nothing that can not be fixed. Maybe try this?
https://sensa.health/self-esteem/ -
What I think is happening is that you are on the first step to start figuring out your own feelings, thats why you actually felt hurt, and while that can be hard, it’s necessary in the long run.
If you cannot feel hurt its hard to be really happy, the contrast it what makes the happy moments happy.
I have been rejected and yes it hurt but after that I also learned and got better of noticing others feeling resulting in me meeting my spouse to be about two years later.
As said, it could be good to actually seek help from a professional, they can help you speed up the process and avoid mistakes and if your friend still stays around you can still be friends and who knows what the future holds.
They might in time change their position or you might catch they eye of someone else.
The most important is to not give up, the future might not become exactly what we imagined but it can also be much better that we ever dreamed about. -
i feel like I was in a similar situation before, though I'm not *that* anti social. But I did propose to someone in the past and it made things awkward for a while.
I was devastated for few weeks and still depressed for few months and made sure to always be nice to that person and maintain some friendship, but it felt weird.
Though eventually I was just too fed up with my self for being so depressed and got my shit together and started living again. I actually found someone else who I truly fell in love with and my friendship with the other person completely healed as time went by. It's a somewhat long process, but there's no need to despair. If they don't feel the same towards you as you do towards them, then you really have no other choice than to respect that and move on. It'll stop being weird eventually -
i feel like I was in a similar situation before, though I'm not *that* anti social. But I did propose to someone in the past and it made things awkward for a while.
I was devastated for few weeks and still depressed for few months and made sure to always be nice to that person and maintain some friendship, but it felt weird.
Though eventually I was just too fed up with my self for being so depressed and got my shit together and started living again. I actually found someone else who I truly fell in love with and my friendship with the other person completely healed as time went by. It's a somewhat long process, but there's no need to despair. If they don't feel the same towards you as you do towards them, then you really have no other choice than to respect that and move on. It'll stop being weird eventually -
-
You know what's funny. I read your warning about how it is long and I was intrigued.
But it was an incoherent mess. And I was about to move on and leave you with your teenage angst drama that could have been directed by Joss Whedon.
But on the other hand, you stepped out in public and publicly announced to stay away if we feel negative about it. So that requires me to tell you that you're an idiot. You do not have any control about the public, but the attempt of controlling it is a challenge. You invite negativity.
And believe me, I have a lot of negativity towards your post. I am still holding back. Mainly because I am too lazy to type it out. But the irony that I wouldn't have said anything if you weren't an entitled little bitch... That's just gold. -
@WhoAmIAgain so what if someones opinion honestly _is_ “BOo, gEt oFf ThE sTaGe”?
-
@WhoAmIAgain
What is this now? First you ask for no negativity and then you beg for more detail on negativity. Is your MO to always do what creates most reactions? -
@WhoAmIAgain What makes negativity unnecessary? And why do you believe mine is necessary negativity?
-
@WhoAmIAgain Yeah, but I asked why you believe mine is necessary negativity?
-
@WhoAmIAgain
Exactly, you said twice that you don't believe mine is unnecessary. Hence I asked what makes you believe it is necessary negativity.
Maybe reading glasses?
Anyway, logic coherent answers would be either a reason for its necessity or an argument for it not being a true dichotomy. Or maybe surprise me and answer something I haven't thought about. -
@WhoAmIAgain
Well... That was a surprising answer. And I don't think I disagree.
Okay... then my real opinion about you and your post. No negativity, just my impression.
You felt nothing. Then you feel sad. You want to put it into words. You use love. Bull crap. You just don't know how to explain it. You got jolted by loss aversion. A basic behaviour principle.
You sound depressed. Or something similar. I am not a psychologist. Talking to us won't help you. Go see a psychologist about it. And it's okay to not enjoy meeting new people. It doesn't mean you have to be sad. It's not a character flaw. It's also not your fault. So go get real help, this won't be helpful. -
@WhoAmIAgain
Well.. that's normal for depression, isn't it? As far as I know, it comes in waves. Just remember the next time you feel better to make an appointment. Until then, wait. -
HealthyGamerGG on Youtube has some really good videos about widespread psy issues and how to handle them:
https://youtube.com/@HealthyGamerGG...
Related Rants
Thank you makers
This guy
DON’T READ IF YOU DON’T LIKE LONG STORIES. ALSO DON’T EVEN BOTHER INTERACTING IF YOU’RE JUST GOING TO BE NEGATIVE.🙂
How should I start… Because I am a socially awkward dumb a**, I have trouble talking to literally everyone, even my close friends. One of which in particular that (I think) I have liked for years, but I’m too dumb to know for sure so I confessed to them to figure it out, and, like I thought, they rejected me, but I didn’t really feel anything, so I was like, “Oh, guess I don’t like them then🤷,” and things were fine even afterwards (this was a while ago btw.) But even if I am socially awkward, I at least try to wave or say hi to my friends when I see them. In relation to this, recently I have made a habit of saying hi to that one close friend in particular, and I don’t know much about my feelings, which means I definitely won’t know much about other peoples’ feelings, but it looked to me like that friend felt a bit uncomfortable whenever I said hi. Now, hitting me like a wrecking ball (lol), I realized, I probably love them. (Which is a completely new concept for me.) Which made it hurt ALL THE MORE when I asked my friend about their apparent discomfort, and got the answer I was hoping I wouldn’t. This friend no longer felt like we would be a good fit. The friend said that they don’t feel our vibes match (something like that), which I guess makes them not want to talk to me as much either, but we could still check in with each other occasionally. I told them, and meant, that I COMPLETELY understand, because I mean, who would really want to be friends with and talk to someone that barely talks themselves and barely makes an effort to make new friends or talk to other people? A friend that never comes and hangs out at their house or that doesn’t even like going out? But it hurt nonetheless. It confuses and hurts me that this friend doesn’t really want to talk to me but also apparently cares enough to not completely cut ties with me. I’m not mad at them in the slightest, but what am I supposed to do? Completely forget my feelings for them and the, albeit meager, memories we’ve made together as friends, but also keep them close enough to be at least acquaintances? I don’t think I can or want to do that, but I guess it’s not my choice now. I have to try.
rant
love
hurt
friends
long