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"This dump is taking forever" - things that sound strange outside of a dev environment.

What are some other good ones?

Comments
  • 29
    (On the phone)
    "I can control my thermostat with a raspberry pie."
    "..."
    "Yeah, leaving my python running at home was a good choice. Definitely."
    "..."
    "Yeah, I'd invite people to come see it, but everyone says it's too boring."
    "..."
    "Well, I mean, come on. Nobody likes Java."
    "..."
    "Sure, man. I'll send you some eggs and let you get started."
  • 13
    @chadd17 - HA! love it! I remember being excited about the raspberry pi and the person I was talking to (non-dev) couldn't understand what was so special about a "pie" lol.
  • 9
    @KittyCrumpet happens to me constantly. And when they realize I'm not talking about literal pie, they get too hungry to hear the rest. Mm, pie..
  • 16
    I could probably go on for a wee bit long..
    But here goes a few.

    "your listeners don't seem to catch your event."

    "model views controller."

    "ah yeah, just inject that from the container."

    "build against an interface, not the concrete implementation"

    "the container automatically resolve the dependencies typically through reflection. Often referred to as dependency inversion"

    "curl that is api endpoint."
  • 3
    @chadd17 damnit now *I* want pie....
  • 9
    Almost forgot "move fast and break things".

    https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/...
  • 2
    @chadd17 lmao omg the mars rover got me
  • 56
    A: "how should we clean up?"
    B: "we force the parents to kill their children"
    A: "what about the orphans?"
    B: "let the garbage collector take care of the orphans"

    Source: someone brilliant on devRant
  • 3
    @hawkes I'm dying
  • 8
    @chadd17 ambulance();
  • 30
    "Dave prefers playing with the back-end but has been known to have a go at the front-end."

    "We just need to plug your front-end into my back-end."
  • 21
    @serpent5 - ok those are hilarious lol. My coworker was actually telling me about a place he used to work where HR literally pulled a couple devs aside and asked if they were being sexually harassed after overhearing phrases like that 😂
  • 15
    - it was never properly killed, so now we have a zombie on our hands (ref. to zombie progresses)

    - Total Inability To Support Usual Performance ( TITS UP )

    - plug and play

    - fat model architecture
  • 22
    @DarkMukke ah.. " unzip it, then bash it and finally, you can probe it by knocking its port with finger."

    # unixpron
  • 14
    @lotd some1 brute force fingered my socket
  • 13
    (ref to git)
    I think I should pull now.
  • 13
    You should pull before you push
  • 9
    (git) push --force
    I pushed, you can pull now.
    Do you prefer front-end or back-end?
    😊😏😊
  • 12
    Did you kill all of its children?
  • 13
    Penetration testing
  • 11
    Speaking of version control..
    Cherry picking
  • 4
    @lotd omg that's a great one 😂😂
  • 5
    @KittyCrumpet yeah, that's what she said.
  • 15
    "You're trying to explode an object, but you need a string"

    "Don't make it public. Use a method for exposing your privates"

    "I don't think this library is safe, it leaks after every execution"

    "Cassandra can take a lot, but that load was just too big" — "Yeah, but I tried Couch and that was completely flooded as well"

    "Your package is a too big for inclusion, and certainly not DRY enough. I like that you tested it thoroughly though, great coverage"
  • 1
  • 2
    A recent one..
    "you fired too many threads at your elastic server. The box booted for fuck sake."

    I was stress testing one of my vps and had to contact support to ask them politely to *ahem* tend to my brutal fuck up.
  • 2
    "The payload is inserted into the backdoor"
  • 0
  • 3
    when I'm talking about 'container queries' I don't mean tupperware…
  • 2
    joining two tables which are not related by a foreign key relationship
  • 1
    Hash/Rainbow tables
  • 4
    "Let's add the hash to the cookie"
  • 2
    Just heard this one:
    Now you can get rid of Ebola *and* Pandas at the same time.

    Pandas is a python statistics lib and the statistics in question were sample data about ebola that wouldn't be used in the final project
  • 2
    "In order to get the sniffer running properly we're going to have to flip this over to promiscuous mode"
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