"In a sentence: Technically brilliant, delightful to work with, combined with a self-awareness and strong desire to improve. We also want to make sure everyone is highly supportive of each other; we win as a team."

In short: you're looking for a unicorn, which your company won't be.

Guy really said he wants the charisma of Steve Jobs and the technical genius of Wozniak...

are people really this stupid?

When I first got to an us-style interview for a job, I thought that "no way that it will be like the movies, right? They are not gonna ask what type of tree would I be or propose a stupid gameshow puzzle, will they?"
Yeah, it wasn't. I've had like 20 bad-comedy-movie worthy interviews since then, but in that first, they were simply looking for "the best person for this job...". The unsaid part was "...that is willing to work in exchange for a couple stained pennies and a cracked button every other month".
I didn't got that first job, but I did get one soon after. When I told them I was "creative and determined, but also a team player".
They just want to fill an stupid form, they want to be able to tell their bosses, if it turns out that their hire was a lemon, that the kid they hired was a con artist.
Well, if that is what they want, give them that. Nobody cares about your interview after you get hired, it becomes like your old high school tests. Lost to irrelevance in time.

Omg, the charisma of jobs. /r/LinkedInlunatics