@MammaNeedHummus, can I get that audio recording of you peeing that you've sent your cousin?
👉👈

How you spend your days is how you spend your life.

If you want a terrifying name for your metal band, don't call it “Whispers from the Abyss of Despair” or “Through the Veil of Darkness and Desolation”.

Call it “Surgery Robot From Temu”.

pLeAsE dOnAtE tO hElP mE aFfOrD hOsTing

lolwut? you have a free-for-all project with no premium features. Users can’t create accounts. All of your code is JS, you don’t even need a server. Just host your stuff on Cloudflare. I have just about a gigabyte of data uploaded there on my free account, so if I can do it, so do you. Just use a CDN for your client-only, JS-only project.

domains though… yours is long and costs around 40 bucks a YEAR.

if you made a good product and want to make some money with it, that’s completely okay, so just say so: “I want money for my work, but I don’t want to take away features that were free and can be provided at no additional cost, so please donate”. Why lie? It’s not like people who won’t donate to you based on this justification will magically donate for “hosting”.

ladies and gentlemen, goto in JS!

> I made it through the security! Finally, time for some blues!
> *guy on stage pulls out the guitar*
> *It's a $5,000 PRS*
> oh no, it's going to be lawyer blues!
> 🎵that nasty prosecutor, he got me by my balls🎵
> 🎵LORD! that that nasty prosecutor got me by my balls🎵
> 🎵I wish I could finish the paperwork…🎵
> 🎵LORD! I wish I could finish until the morning falls🎵
> *five minutes of minor pentatonic noodling*

The purpose of this vessel is to obscure the location of real vessels

The downsides of coding drunk: Implementing the same thing you've already implemented but forget you did

Am I going crazy or is the web dev community on some otherworldly drug?
Now "server-side"-whatever is the coolest thing ever?
To the point where client side validation is not recommended anymore and actively discouraged? Are you kidding me? So, you mean to say after filling a long form with millions of fields, the page will RELOAD when I press submit and after waiting an eternity for your shitty server to respond then and only then will I know what fields are invalid?
GTFO with that bullshit.
How in the world is that good UX/UI?
I've always had this theory that we humans are the dumbest species to ever walk this earth. I mean, serisouly, how is this even a thing?

Imagine if a mobile app had to restart to tell you that your email is invalid in a simple form.

But.. but... but... what if the client has disabled javascript? Then fuck them! Who the fuck cares? What's next? Some dumb user is still using Android 2.1 Eclair and we should make our app support them? Fuck no! Fuck them, they should update.
Newsflash, if Javascript is disabled, then pretty much everything will be broken anyway.

Form validation should be instantenous. This isn't rocket science.
It should happen as the user types so they can see what's valid/invalid in real-time.
This does require effort and consideration, something many devs lack apparently.

This is just ridiculous.

If I had a dollar for every time my mom tried to literally convince me that I wasn't in fact me, but was an impostor planted by aliens… I would have one dollar.
Yes, it did happen. I was twelve.

z-index you set minus z-index that was necessary is the number of whips you should receive. Whips with barbed wire that is.

To all of you… PLEASE get into the DIY electronics hobby. Learn how to solder. Learn how to 3D-print. Learn basic circuit design.
The monopoly on electronics production know-how can and will be used as a mechanism of oppression. We the people should be able to rebuild the modern world from scratch out of salvaged components if need be, independent of centralized institutions.

You use English because it’s the only language you know
I use English because it’s the only language YOU know
We are not the same

The only thing more terrifying than CSS is a person who's not terrified of it.

Instead of age++, I now do lifetime--;

Older devRanters who had a joystick port on their SoundBlasters back in the day… did you ever use it to plug in a joystick?

Yes, Gaurav didn't get in, but… your younger Aditya still needs a uni degree, right? And the government needs human skin. Gaurav is of no use anyway, he'll never make it without a degree. Let's fix things by making a mutually beneficial decision?

A good human hide went for around Ꙩ300. This is why parents made sure kids had good hygiene and no scars until the uni exams. A lower-grade hide was just Ꙩ30 and was only useful for “special” leather novelties.

Meanwhile, good hides made excellent high fashion coats for the royalty.

It was a shame that U-boat had to go down, burning all 70 crew alive. They were all 20 to 23.

dfox returned to sell custom avatars for $7/mo. Y’all laughed, then some Chinese spammer with mspaint avatar took over the platform while retoor justified his actions

Slovenia: when the tools are made in Germany, but the materials are made in China.

Rich European countries are 2004 Brazil during the championship. Every other country is just 2004 Brazil.

I became potus and wanted to cut military spending, but my cat learned how to pronounce the word “representative” and kept saying I was a bad representative

TIL that there was a KDE port for Windows.

Open letter to any website that is trying to implement "smooth scrolling" on their website using JavaScript: stop, consider how awful it is 100% of the time, and kill yourself please.

Kiki dream log from today
5am

how to be a shitty client:
- have a legacy database where column names are misspelled and everything is nullable
- hire external help which instead of helping break the ui (bonus points for breaking the api too)
- demand a very much custom auth logic but decide to use aws cognito for shits and giggles
- demand 1hr daily meetings
- demand biometric auth with 0 knowledge of how biometric auth works (the previous devs just had a face id prompt which does nothing and retrieved email and password saved on the device???)
- message me at 2am because you don't understand how timezones work + demand a build while you're at it
- call me a "heretical pagan" because i took a day off on a holiday you don't celebrate (???)

i could go on but i think this is enough

!dev

There’s this person at $work who never uses punctuation of any kind. She has mental issues and insists on neutral pronouns (and strongly advertises these) so I’ll use the indefinite to pretend to be respectful. It has multiple thoughts while typing a message and just keeps typing through all of them without stopping. It pauses not to collect its thoughts, to edit for clarity or to fix mistakes, to separate anything (including disjoint topics), to summarize, etc. (Though calling these “thoughts” is a huge stretch, given its lack of propensity for that particular subject.) It’s as if it has zero distinction between writing and speaking, and simply lets the mental diarrhea flow while their fingers do their best to keep pace. Reading these trainwrecks of thought — and gleaning any useful information from them — is always difficult and a little bit painful.

It is also in charge of IT security, which is more than a bit worrying. (But I hate the company with a passion, so it doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it otherwise would.)

starting another side project 😭😭😭😭😭

this Carter guy is now old enough to run for president!

mmmmmmm olives

Deleted over 1'500 lines of code over the last 2 days and replaced it with 80 lines of readable, simple, generic code.

And I'm feeelin' gooood 🎶

I’m writing a short story about Claire and Git. It doesn’t end well.