At the beginning of a project, everybody has lots of good intentions- call them "new project resolutions." ... Once the project gets underway, though, these good intentions are abandoned, one at a time. When the project is finally delivered,the code looks like a mess, and nobody seems to know how it came to be that way.
-Coding Standard

Pretty legit

Thank God for Authy app!
Lost phone and was able to get all my 2FA accounts linked up in seconds.
That would have been a logistical nightmare given that all my account are 2fa.
I can see it now
Enter username: xyz
Enter password: abc
Enter 2fa code: dangit
Lost or recover account
Enter phone number: dangit

Thanks @dfox for adding the modify post feature.

I've been gone for awhile lol

Developer 1: Stop changing all my loops into switches!

Developer 2: if you'd learn when to use a switch I wouldn't have to change it for you!

-My 2 devs argument today

#officechat #good2betheboss

That one user case you could have never prepared for. SMH

ETA for patch: 1 month, "maybe"

!Friday

Home office

If you refused to pay for extended support there's no need for us to "Fix" a problem on your app when there's a new IOS or Android version released.
Sure it might work and no we can't future proof it.

Just pay for extended support and no that's not part of the development.

I took this contract and made the suggestion that we backup to the cloud and create a private repo on GIT. Client said no, local should be fine, they don't want someone stealing their code. I said okay fine.
AC just went out in the server room and they apparently had a leak from the AC to the power supply which they happened to put on top of the rack servers and switches. I'm surprised that place didn't catch fire, might be to early to call it.
All this on a Friday and we were 2 weeks away from launch party.
Not my fault, I clearly said we backup to cloud and use GIT on private repo.

To my employees:

I know you on here 👀
Carry on ✌🏻️

By the time you master a language it's already change - Life

10 years in dev and can't seem to keep up with all these languages. I learn one forget the other. Mix up syntax. Features removed or added.
Still use cheat sheets which I update as the languages change.
Just me or everyone else?

It's clearly in the contract people.
You walk a client through the entire contract and come launch they want to add pages and change layouts without paying extra because they have 24 hours to launch.
What don't you get about "you approved the site map, layouts, and designs which is what we quoted you for, contract clearly states how much per extra pages and how much to change layouts and designs after approval and work processed"

I used this today

First law of software quality

Legit excuse

And I'm supposed to press what exactly?

6 months later
Still don't understand Docker

DRY
Enough said

Downloads a whole bunch of training videos.
-this looks interesting (clicks magnet link)
-I want to learn this (clicks magnet link)
-This would be useful to know (clicks magnet link)

Watches 1 out of 100000 downloads
10+TB data

Secretly waiting for matrix like learning

When bae walks around naked to get you off the computer 👌🏻😁

New client: we have all the source files for our website just need it to be responsive. We paid a lot for it back then, should be easy to for you to work on.

*Sure we'll take on the project
**Gets Flattened PSD file, HTML CSS JS Minified :/

That moment you find the Easter egg in the devRant code😅😂

You haven't coded long enough if you don't use f.lux

iptables -L -n

Attempts against SSH

What did SSH ever do to you?

Yum -y update
.........................

Reboot

.........................

CWP error 404 on all domains
Face palm

When you tell your client not to upgrade to Wordpress 4.5 until the theme is patched for it and they do it anyways.
Complains certain functions aren't working anymore.

Yes, we know. We told you not to do the update yet