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So... This company was in trouble. They hire me to help fix things and build this nice new stack to get rid of their old legacy monster application.

I'm there for three weeks when one of their top investors storms in. Apparently they are turning less profit than they told me during my interview. (Yeah, it is one of the things I always ask, even thought I don't always get an answer).

So this investor/shareholder guy starts on this motivation speech which is basically a veiled threat that "we" need to do better.

Obviously he doesn't know anyone in the room other than the boss. And it was apparent, at least to me, he also has 0% knowledge of anything related to software development. The boss doesn't look to happy about having to let this happen.

Then the guy turns to me. He points his finger at me and demands to know how failing so badly makes me feel...

So I answered truthfully... "I've only been here for three weeks, so I don't think I've been failing too much, yet. Now, how long did you say you've been throwing money at this failure without getting the return you wanted?" Emphasizing the "you" by pointing right back at him.

That doesn't shut the guy up, but he does bring his "motivational" speech to a rapid close.

He doesn't bother saying goodbye when he stormed out again, not even to the boss, who looks a lot happier at this point.

Apparently the guy pulled this stunt every couple of months (or weeks, if he was bored enough). After this encounter, he apparently had enough of trying to "motivate" us developers. We I didn't see him again in the 2 years I worked with the company after that.

I got a pay raise the month after. Apparently that was totally unrelated to this incident... 😙🎵

Comments
  • 8
    Nice story, glad it worked out well. Welcome aboard!
  • 5
    Best attitude and best response. 😊 If you keep that up, you'll be popular here, and probably everywhere else, too.

    Welcome to devRant!
  • 7
    Hahaha. Motherfucker. He's probably doing one of those "impact" speech shit thing and seeing himself as some sort of leader who wakes everyone up and save them from failure.

    Good job putting him in his place. Geez, what a dumb motherfucker, pointed at the wrong person.
  • 2
    Damnnn what a response 👏🏻
    I hope one day I can be as brave and quick witted as you are
  • 2
    That was a witty response which seems to have gotten your boss to appreciate/value you more.
  • 0
    Good job. Maybe he's still trying to come up with a great comeback.
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