46

> be me
> create profile in dating app because pandemic rules make meeting people at irl events impossible
> match with cute girl
> start to talk about interesting stuff
> mention being a software developer
> her: 'pls help me I have a not activated windows 10 on my laptop and can't do stuff since the last update'
> fml

Comments
  • 26
    I enjoy cooking, hiking, long walks on the beach, and free tech support.
  • 7
    @BobbyTables pretty much. Well, if I'd get free health care in return I wouldn't complain
  • 10
    Never mention you're a programmer. Always say something stupid like a janitor. Avoids those questions and the people on dating sites never get deep enough for them to find out you're actually a programmer.
  • 18
    @vomitmachine if you say you are a janitor they will be like 'please repare the sink in my kitchen'
  • 2
    @IAmNotARobot That's a plumber.
  • 9
    @vomitmachine never stopped them from asking printer/OS configuration/maintenance issues to a programmer although it's a printer mechanic or sysadmin job. Why would a janitor be any different 🤷
  • 7
    @hjk101 one of the most valid points I think I've heard on here.
  • 12
    Just say you're on Linux so that you don't know how to deal with the numerous problems of Win 10. ^^
  • 7
    @Fast-Nop That's... genius! 😄
    But there is a chance that the person doesn’t know what Linux is and doesn't know that there are other operating systems... whatever that is.
  • 7
    @Lensflare Either the topic gets dropped and you can head for the fuck, or you can postpone the fuck and raise a penguin fledgling.
  • 9
    @Fast-Nop even Tinder girls would know proud Linux users are hopeless virgins so he would reduce his chance to get laid. The guy is software developer already, give him a break :/
  • 3
    @aviophile I guess it's better to pretend being an Apple user instead. 🤔
  • 3
    @aviophile Well yeah, but in that case, he'd fail anyway, so doing something for the greater good is still the best way of action.

    Also, Tinder girls are dumb psychotic chicks who neither know about birth control nor the STDs they already carry, so don't expect them to know what Linux even is.
  • 6
    Someone I knew used to say they worked in a banana factory, never got asked to help with anything !
  • 12
    You've probably heard this before, but an ex of mine was chatting to me one day about how she'd spent $1,000 trying to get her overheating radiator car fixed, but after 3 garages, none of them fixed it.

    She said it was a pity I didn't know about cars..

    Well, you never asked, I said. :-)

    She eyed me suspiciously..

    I'll have a look if you like, I said.

    5 minutes later, its fixed.

    She was amazed, and annoyed that all that time together, I never mentioned I could fix cars !

    Well, I know a tiny bit.

    like, electric plugs connected to the cooling fan for the radiator that fit together and are missing a clip, won't stay together..

    And a handy piece of wire found in the gutter, was ideal to tie them together with.

    After that, is that other story I tell about the time when she got a new old car, and the alarm went off, and came to mine for me to make it stop.

    Which I did. :-)

    Then she complained it wouldn't go !

    Well, you only said make the noise stop..
  • 8
    @Nanos

    She asked how did I make it stop.

    Easy I said, unplug things until it stops.

    Which things she asked..

    Oh, I dunno, anything I replied. :-)

    Make it run again she said !

    So, I plugged everything back in again..

    It ran, but the alarm was wailing all the time. :-)

    After that, she never bothered me again !
  • 7
    @Nanos Requirement based engineering in a nutshell. ^^
  • 6
    once you labeled as an "IT Guy" everyone will throw all computer related problem to you :D

    oh wait, even if it just electronic problem, they will just call you :D
  • 10
    In case anyone interested in the follow-up, I told her I'm not a sys admin or helpdesk guy so I'm not sure if I can help with that. She said since I'm a man I'm supposed to know this stuff anyway, so I told her I don't see how that's relevant as I've never used my genitals to buy and enter a windows product key. Long story short, it turns out she likes my bitter and sarcastic style and actually was able to get activate her windows with all this information and we are going on a date today evening.
  • 2
    @IAmNotARobot congrats and good luck
  • 1
  • 1
    @IAmNotARobot

    Fingers crossed for you.

    FX [ Waits for next soap update.. ]
  • 2
    How did the date end up going?
  • 0
    @Lensflare If you dont wanna stay Android/Linux peasant. Do you ever see Apple chads prove themselves to other brands?
Add Comment