Maybe I'm not cut out to program. I have yet to write an entire program start to finish outside of tut sites and still have little idea as to what I'm doing.

Yeah I have the same "fight club" feeling too

Sounds like my Tuesdays

We all start somewhere. Using the internet and references isn't a crutch - even the pros do it.

Some of the programs we work on at work are too big to write start to finish. Don't feel bad about it. At least there are active tutorials and tit bits on the web for most things. Back in the 80's my reference was a manual for basic and the commodore 64's user guide.

I know how you feel. The trick is start small. Really small. Then keep adding features. This is best way to learn. After few features you might think that the current approach is not best suited so you start from scratch again. That's how you learn about common programming mistakes. The best way to learn is trying. Don't get discouraged by failures. All experienced ones also face it quite frequently. And then they buckle up and try again with different approach. Don't lose hope dont despair. Rome was not built in a day. Remember that.

You should consider following some tutorials by Thenewboston (Bucky Roberts) on YouTube. He's a great teacher and sure knows what he's saying (most of the time).

What you need is purpose.

You need a problem to solve. Following a tutorial and make a little blog or todo app is neat, but you need differentiation from existing products and usability to keep you motivated and expand your skills.

Find a thing in your life you feel deeply connected to. Love gardening? Get some sensors and a microcontroller, display graphs in a web UI or mobile app. Love cooking? Write a fridge inventory, recipe scheduling and shopping list app. Obsessed about a TV show? Make a webpage which interactively graphs out where/when each character appears in each episode. Get annoyed by any repetitive task on your computer? Script the hell out of it.

It can be difficult to pick a motivating relatable project to work on, but it's a must to keep yourself going, especially when you're starting out and don't have any external end users to give you feedback yet.

@bittersweet Welp let's try scripting. I do very minimal amounts presently. Just to reboot and launch a cluster of programs. But thank you, I will try to pursue something.

@yendenikhil thanks m8. I'll have to first develop a concept to start with. I may try some scripting.

@CCTrollz Awesome. Don't be afraid to try new things, it's also totally OK to have 10 projects and work only on one for weeks.

But developers are always in demand, so even if you learn it just as a fallback it's a great thing to invest time in!

@bittersweet Well I'm still in school, not specialized yet. I hope to pursue something along the lines of development.