11
netikras
307d

I am strong technically, resourceful, with good analytical thinking, but I suck at comms. I lack patience and I struggle with communicating in a politcorrect business-friendly language when reaching out to other technical teams. I feel and behave as if they were all local folks, as if in a walking distance from my desk, when irl they [the client] may as well be on a diff continent

How can I improve? Anyone else had a similar problem? How did you overcome it?

Is this nuance going to be a problem in a career path past the senior chair?

What do you reckon?

Comments
  • 6
    I am / was in the same boat.

    I'm having a speech impediment, stuttering, mostly when my patience is running thin as my brain runs faster than the communication.

    I was at a point where I thought about therapy, as some pointed out how annoying it was. I might seem like a prick now, but I gave up that thought after being more observant in the meetings / discussions.

    Fun fact: Same people who complained aren't different. They might not stutter, but they have all their own kind of annoying things. It's just easier to point out the obvious flaws in others.

    I changed then. For starters, I let other people write the meeting notes, so I can focus more on the conversation. I only talk when I have to, otherwise I'm muted . No more small talk, no nice things. It made it far easier for me.

    Obviously that's not gonna work when you have to acquire (new) clients via talking, but never the less a good tip: Be very aware of others, ask politely for tips on how to improve and focus on what's important. But don't, really don't, change just for the sake of pleasing others.

    If you have to learn how to talk neutral, a communications coach might not be a bad idea. More about learning the lingo, less about learning how to talk.

    It's imho only a nuisance if you make it a nuisance.

    E.g. my communication might not be flawless, but I'm nevertheless more valuable than most of the chimpanzees screaming and throwing shit in the room.

    I would rather like having someone who welcomes me with an open heart than having to listen for half an hour to empty meaningless small talk with a lot of shadiness integrated, to be honest. ;)
  • 3
    Becoming more inhuman business-like wouldn't be "improving" in my book
  • 5
    @nururururu agreed. People like personal messages. Just so long as it's not too informal.
    If it's as important as a client, then let them set the tone, but always be a few shades more formal just in case.

    The Pragmatic Programmer book has a great section on this
  • 3
    Just be kind to the other end. Nothing else really matters. We're all human here.
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