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I think we're on the same boat. Do you have any other skills you could use in a profession? I can relate with the feeling of defeat and uselessness. I'm currently looking for a part time job, so I can practise my skills, gather some money, buy a better machine and build a portofolio. In your case it could be a temporary job where you can possibly also make some connections. Some days are utterly hopelessly bad, aren't not so. Keep your chin up, you've already accomplished things, even though you can't show them off and better than nothing at all!
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kunashe19687y@plumbus - I learned something recently: an employee is a wholly different animal to a freelancer. We might all write code - but the conditions in which we do this make all the difference.
Becoming a coding employee having been a freelancer is a change in career.
I do seriously hope you can find a way of making it work as a freelancer. I wouldn't want us to become extinct.
04:27, London -
jeeper58107yFreelancing is total shit if you are in the first world and you’re just trying to do general work. You have to be super specialized.
It sounds like your last jobs just sucked. Solution is simple. Don’t put a date before 2005 on your resume. Build some fiddly project on GitHub. Doesn’t have to be good there are many places that are just looking for basic task completion and competency with loops and functions. Get hired at a place that doesn’t suck.
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Running my own business is not going well. Hasnt for years now. Previous dev jobs were also just nightmares. I feel like i cant cut it as a freelancer, or as a full time dev. I do enjoy programming but my resume is crap and my worthwhile portfolio items are basically all locked down under NDAs or ambiguous accountability. I cant prove im even worth hiring and im almost too old to be considered for any junior role. Not that i think i could handle it. So im considering finding a new career and keeping coding as my hobby. But first i have to decide what to do about my remaining client. Which is fine because... i dont even know what i could do for a full time job now. Ugh, im so profoundly discouraged i dont even want to try and think about this anymore.
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burn out
depression
sad
worthless
fml
useless
money