Had to create a quick server side script. Created a quick function that returns an array, and tried to access a value from the function call like this:

$val = func()[0]

Apparently php didn’t include that feature until PHP 5.4

Wtf PHP.

Log into my webhost to update the the PHP version; only to discover that the highest PHP is PHP 5.5. PHP 7 is the current revision.

Wtf a2hosting.