AboutI'm fake programmer, faking it for 10+ years.
Joined devRant on 5/15/2020
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I happened to come help with a project that deadline was in two weeks. It was hardware project for customers with UI.
They said to me - help us 2 weeks and it’s done. It only needs polishing. There was nothing working and we finished it after half a year.
Hardware was crap and drivers wasn’t working. Managers called me stupid when I tried to explain that this is hardware team fault. They used to say that it was tested in laboratory and there is no defect. Laboratory my ass fucking assholes never released anything from scratch.
I got depressed after this project for a year. It was fucking nightmare.
Everything, literally everything was rewritten 3 times cause of stupid decisions that I questioned all the time. At the end of project most of those assholes stopped commenting my decisions. I believe we released impossible product that was crap but based on usage rates I got later when I left it returned expenses.
I lost like 2 years of my life and about 20kg during those 6 months. Never again.
not sure if this counts, but i'm sure it's going to hugely amuse at least a few people.
... sometimes when i get stuck in a coding task (when i'm working at home, of course) i go watch porn for a while, it clears my head nicely.
there was one day i was trying streaming my programming for the first or second time in my life, and... yeah, i got stuck. and yeah, i forgot i was streaming...
luckily, nobody was watching those streams, and i realized what i did as soon as i got back to coding, so i immediately stopped the stream and went and deleted the vod.
i think the next time i mustered enough courage to try streaming again was like two or three months later... XD14
It looks like I FINALLY stopped binge spending.
Two years ago I was making like $500 a month and couldn’t manage it properly so sometimes I couldn’t even afford to eat.
Now I open my banking app and it puts smile on my face.3
Inspired by @Billgates
everyone around is hyped about new tech they get to use, new toys to tinker with, I can see their eyes shining when they hear "let's try and introduce kafka" - they would wiggle their tails all day long if they had ones!
And me? Well, a new potential employer got me so excited I couldn't wash a smile off my face for a few days! You know what they said? "we don't use any frameworks, we focus on clean code, solid, kiss and we write with tdd". Bare java - that's the best position I've heard of in years!
I guess I'm oldschool. But I truly believe their approach is the right one. Not trashing the code with spring [which is turning into smth what systemd is for linux/unix], hibernate and what not.
Just good old java code. Db, multithreading, request-mapping -- all plain, manual and simple.