What do you call a party with developers?

A git together

I'm so sorry.

alias wow="git status"
alias such="git"
alias very="git"

Result:

$ wow
$ such commit
$ very push

git everywhere

Git blame strikes again

Solution to all of our Git problems

git blame

Me: *just playing around with Git on my terminal*

Friend: "Man, you're such a geek, typing your git command on the terminal.. I myself can't use git without the GUI at all"

Me: *stares at him in silence*

Me: "Wait... THERE 'S A GUI FOR THAT?"

*true story when I was in college*

When AI meets git
- {turnoff.us}

GIT Cheat Sheet

git commit -m "Finally finished"

git commit -m "Fixed a typo. now finished"

git commit -m "Oops a bug. Definitely finished"

git commit -m "False alarm. Yup finished now"

git commit -m "Another typo..."

git commit -m "ugh...."

$ git init

git blame
git fired
git depression
git divorce
git homeless
git commit
git job
git house
git wife --better
exit

git reset

The only thing hard about working with Git is working with people who don't know Git

I know all the git commands:
- git status
- git add
- git commit
- git push

Git blame

Git newbie

git pull --your-shit-together

Why is the "leave building"command now working?!?!?! Are you sure it's a Git command?? .... Oh shit.

Sometimes I name my project "suicide" so that when I do a git commit I could say that I committed suicide.

Whenever I mistype, "git status" as "git statsu", I thought I was speaking Japanese. 😂

No, I'm not "switching to FTP," it's about time your learn git mate.

Me using git

Toughest part of git is writing the commit message

Wtf?? Who wrote this shitty code???

* git blame *

Oh... Right... It was me...

I love when I accidentally write "git ass" instead of "git add". I laugh every time.

Begin a lazy fuck -> not taking the time to learn git while I've had plenty of time and now I still hardly know how to use it.

Git merge <3

May I introduce you to my coworkers git repo

Today a Coworker got a little piece of paper acknowledging that he was a Git master, two hours later he fucked up all the branches.

Git log went wrong 😰

Git commit -m "nothing to say"

Gotta admit, I'm still finding out this git thingy.

😅

git commit suicide

In case of fire:

Git commit
Git push
Git out of building

Crazy how git got its name:

The name "git" was given by Linus Torvalds when he wrote the very first version. He described the tool as "the stupid content tracker" and the name as (depending on your mood):

- random three-letter combination that is pronounceable, and not actually used by any common UNIX command. The fact that it is a mispronunciation of "get" may or may not be relevant.

- stupid. contemptible and despicable. simple. Take your pick from the dictionary of slang.

- "global information tracker": you're in a good mood, and it actually works for you. Angels sing, and a light suddenly fills the room.

- "goddamn idiotic truckload of sh*t": when it breaks

~ from github git

You know you messed Git hard when your commit graph started to look like November Rain on Guitar Hero.

I forced my friends to use git(hub) as vcs because their project was in a usb-to-usb state, which was unacceptable for me. So I offered them my help and uploaded it (with a little bit of a forced consent) to github, to end this misery. Of course I helped them the basics of git. Now they automatically use git(hub) as vcs and to share their code.

I feel proud for this :)

Git....
alias such=git
alias very=git
alias wow=‘git status’
$wow
$ such commit
$ very push

Fell like I can finally vent this now I've calmed down.

Me: You've fucked the tree again
Junior: No I haven't
Me: It says there "Fixing merge conflicts"
Junior: Well it wasn't me I wouldn't have done a merge
Me: It has your name next to it...
Junior: Well that commit wasn't there a second ago
Me: it's dated for Friday...
Junior: Well if you hadn't committed to master and blah blah blah
Me: We'll if you knew know to use git we wouldn't have this problem.

my thoughts on git

Best Git commit msg I ever saw was nothing more than: "please work"
...found after a junior dev left our company and we were reviewing things

With the other members of the team refusing to learn git and making changes directly to the staging server i get to write the commit messages for everyone.

Log:
UPDATE: *informative details *

UPDATE: mark made some changes

UPDATE: colin made the same changes as mark but different

UPDATE: andrew undid all colins updates to change one link and I had to add them back in, thank gawd I commit the night before

BUGFIX: andrew keeps changing the database host to localhost and uploading it without changing it back

UPDATE: we all hate andrew

Git for pros only...
Credits: javascript.js

Got my head detached today...

Good thing a simple git checkout solved it

Sorry John Doe, you're application for this job has been rejected. As we specified for this job you need to know about GitHub. In your CV you stated that you are an expert in git but our job requires the knowledge of hub as well. Good luck next time

Git fetch, get pull, git push, git merge, git clone, git stash

A poem for git in git

Don't forget to Git commit

git happens ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

What I've learnt so far using git for the first time in a major project.

Git commit Suicide

What does a Git say to another?

Check this out man

Fuck git!
Oh, it's solved.
I love git! Git is awesome.

A coworker blamed me that our git server is rejecting his changes. Turns out his commits are 200MB large each, including binaries of all newly added libraries. And I was all like:

"Who the fuck wrote this stupid shit!?"
git blame

It was me...

I "Git Pushed" my friend to "git commit" with a girl he likes for long time

But now my other friend wants to "git rebase" on top of her ....WTF

Now need to resolve this merge conflict 😂😂😂

Learn git before anything else...

Git...

Git...

git merge

Had a fun little conversation with a potential employer...

Him: We use git for version control. To work with our team you'll be expected to do the same and be proficient at it.

Me: Not a problem. I am well versed with all things git! May I ask, what does your work flow look like?

Him: All of our source lives in a single repo and everyone commits straight to master.

Me: 😐...

Him: Conflicts will not be tolerated.

Using a git GUI is like dulling a sharp knife in fear of cutting yourself.

Git for kids

I wish i could git reset --hard my life

git music

$ git push --force origin master

Everyone in my company prefers solving git issues rather than `rm -rf` & `git clone`

Feels like I'm working with a team of geniuses. 😂

I just started using git. it is unbelievably useful. What an idiot I was that I didn't start using it earlier. I LOVE GIT!

* git add .
* git commit
* git push
* git the f*ck out

My git commits are mostly "did shit and stuff" or "changes by David Bowie"....

Friend: Check out that hot chick over there
Me: git checkout -b hot-chick

#foreveralone

Git!=Github

> git commit -m 'fixing what I broke earlier'
> git pish
> git: 'pish' is not a git command. See 'git --help'.

Did you mean this?
push
> you know I meant push, why can't you leave me alone and just do it

git commit -m 'fixed the issue with my light switch'

git pull
git push
git pull
git push
git merge XY
git release vNewBaby

guy add proposal.txt;
git commit -m "Wish me luck";
git push

alias "git commit"="git reset --hard HEAD"

Every time I mess up my git branch I usually find that its pretty futile to fix it with fancy commands like 'git reset', 'git prune', 'git rebase', etc. I usually find it easier to just start over from scratch.

They should really add a command for that

'git fuck-it-start-over'

Don't want to break your commit streak on Github.
So you change one line and :-
git add .
git commit -m "Minor Tweak"
git push

VOILA ! the box is green for today . *Evil Smile*

3 Easy step to learn and use git :
1. git commit
2. git push
3. git gud

My favorite git commit messages:
- "Changed Something"
- "Fixing Something"
- "asda"

Sometimes I forget that not all Terminal commands begin with "git."

git ls
git less fileName.ext
git cd ..

Night before flying internationally includes the following checklist:

- check VPN works, can access frontend sites and hit the backend
- git push

git commit -m "last"
git commit -m "last1"
git commit -m "real last"
git commit -m "real last 1"
git commit -m "real real last"

Use git or get hit

Some days you get git, other days git gets you.

Git > svn
...Just saying.

I forced myself to use git on my latest projects. And the more I use it, the more I love it. I can relate to all the git-love here on devRant.

Code with syntax coloring fascinates my young nephew, so after I commit and push, I let him do his thing then later I do a
git reset HEAD --hard

I forgot to git fetch, so I spent quite a while doing exactly WHAT MY TEAMMATE HAD DONE JUST HOURS AGO

My coworker enlightened me with git stash. Just :woah:

got commit
got add
got pull
got push
...

Typos.. every.. Damn.. time.. so I assigned an alias for got = git

I just wrote "git vomit" instead of "git commit".

One day Linus Torvalds will make a statement about git like: "Why is everybody using this? It was just a joke!"

Typed "git" instead of "get" twice this morning

Fb Source: is it git or jit?

Me: whyyyyyyy would you start this?!

To all those people that have Git alliases like:
"gc" = "git clone" or "ga" = "git add"

What do you do with all that extra saved time?

Git is fun.

There are two types of people in my comp sci class.

1. People who use git

2. People who drop out because noone wants to collab with them

git stop
git talking
git about
git git
git please

git push --force...🔥

git merge

git push --force origin master

-> everyone at the company uses git
-> asked to change some stuff
-> boss says "don't remove the old code, just comment it in case we need it in the future"
-> ...
-> ???

My IT leads git commit history. Lol

Git is life

A git commit message ending with a question mark probably contains questionable code.

Wanna gently annoy your coworker? Every time they send you an idea about something code related, just respond with:

"git checkout shitty_ideas"

First git commit readme.

the shortest horror story:
git merge

git merge conflict
😁😁😁

Learning git

Remember kids, clear out any login credentials before doing git commit and git push!

/smacks himself

Me: How can I delete pushed commits from origin?
Colleague: Just do git reset --hard and then git push -f
Me: But this is dangerous
Colleague: Wait, I'll do it myself
Colleague: Done
Me: But nothing happened
Colleague: Fuck. I just removed all changes on my own branch

git reflog, git reflog...git FUCKING reflog!!!! Ah fuck this, I'm taking the kids out. 3hrs later.... Oh shit, i was in the wrong directory. A good fresh air clears the mind.

$ git reset --hard life

I'm going to teach web dev at a coding school in a few months. In the teaching plan, students have to learn git. But we are told explicitly to only teach using github desktop and not the command line because it puts students off.

I'm not sure how to feel about this

git commit -m ‘minor fixes’

git add -all
Error: did you mean '--all' (with two dashes ?)

Every.
Fucking.
Time.

I feel that I'm using
git push --force
too much.

Anybody else feels this way too?

When you git blame a crap line of code and find out it was your commit

Race to git push -u origin master

I finally learned how to use git, and now I'm in love with it

Exactly my feelings when I switch between TFS and Git

Commiting Prod credentials to git.

If see another "n case of fire..." (git) post...

new git alias :
mergetool : rm -rf .
just delete all conflicts in code

Just git inited, wish me luck ;D

git: 'fucked' is not a git command. See 'git --help'.

Self-storage seems very git hub inspired 😂

git push origin master --force

I have previously worked with a company where they were copying project codes through a USB and making local backups of the whole project with dates and not using git.

Falling in love with Git !

git blame

Git pooed

PM asks me how to use git. 😑

$ git add .
$ git commit -m "This HAS to be online soon"
$ git push
*merge conflict*
*did not look at difference*
*using mine*
$ git commit -m "resolv merge conflict"
$ git push

$ ssh root@x.x.x.x
# git pull
# cd /path/to/webapp
# npm run production

How do you explain git for non-techies? 🤔🤔🤔🤔

just another day in the Git pull room

I just noticed visualizing git is like a timeline with alternate realities and a lot of time travel. The main branch is the main timeline and the branches are like fixes from the past to try and make the future better they merge when the future is fixed otherwise if someone or something fucked up time traveling it becomes the main timeline.

I think the reason why git beginners have a hard time with it is because the api is a bit untuitive.

For example: if you want to "unstage" staged changes, you run git reset, and if you want to "delete" those changes from your working copy, you git checkout those files.

But then, you find out that you can do all of that if you git add . and git reset --hard.
So you're like "huh..."

And then you discover that if you end the resethard with a branch name/commit id then you also make current branch point to the commit or that branch/commit (respectively).
So you're like "huh..."

And also if you add a commit id or branch name to git checkout, you change the current branch to specified/enter detached state with HEAD pointing to that commit (respectively).

Oh and you don't use git branch to create branches, you use git checkout -b because it's a lot shorter.

So here's a rundown: git reset mutates things related to files, but also mutates things related to branches.
git checkout also mutates things related to files and mutates things related to branches too (in a diff way). Also, creates new branches.

I don't think this is intuitive. We users use the same commands for different purposes with just a different flag.
Commands shouldn't mutate different types of things. But don't composite commands (as in, "smart" commands that mutate different things) shoudln't be a flag in an existing command, it should be a single new command of its own.

Maybe if I reread the internals of git now, I'll be able to disgest the dozens of technical terms they throw at you (they are many). And in my mind, the api will cognitively fit to the explanations.

Here's another one that feels weird too.
If you want to make your changes start on top of someone else's commit, you do git rebase.
But git rebase -i can be used for that, and also to delete, modify changes or message of, reorder or combine previous commits of the current branch.

Maybe the reason why several things we do overlap with the same commands is because they internally do similar things, and while not separating those commands might make it less intuitive, it makes them more sensible? i dunno...

disclaimer: I'm not setting this opinion in stone though, and am aware that git was created by one of the most infuential programmers.

When unicorn goes down during git-merge conference!

"git reset --hard HEAD~1" after push

One of my teachers pronounces the 'g' in 'git' like the 'j' in 'jet' and it confuses me each time he says it

Race to 'git push' be like

If git was written in english or in ancient greek it made no difference. It's everything counter-intuitive and you have just to learn commands by heart and google the errors. Because nothing makes sense, even if you know how it works and you used it for years

What is a git?

Use “git commit —amend” the 1st time. The mark of men

Am i doing it right?
git commit -m "Multiple changes and minor changes in the project."

Never `git rebase` when you get home from the pub....

Pro of not using Git

* No git conflict

Sometimes I think that git is like a drug. After getting past the initial learning curve, you use it in every single one of your projects. Sometimes I wonder how have I ever survived without git before.

I don't know git

Honestly, without git version control I wouldn't know how I could manage my project properly. Git is awesome in so many aspects <3

Im rubbish at git, everyday I end up ruining my repo and have to start fresh

Git takes a while to git git, but when you git git you git git.

Me: we should take this project a little more serious, follow the coding standards and please let us use git!

Pal: Oh sure.

//made a new repo and the first commit, sent the link and prepared everything (Granted access etc.)
//2 weeks later

Me: What's up, I already got quite some commits and you haven't pushed anything so far.

Pal: Pushed? what do you mean?

Me: I'm the talking about the git repo, I'm the only one contributing.

Pal: Oh yeah git, I installed it but I have no idea how that stuff works. I opened Git gui but i don't know what I'm supposed to do. I got everything in the Dropbox tho.

Me: ... ... ... FUUUUUUUUU WHAT THE FUCK MATE ARE YOU SHITTING ME, THE HELL DO WE HAVE GOOGLE FOR AND WHY DIDNT YOU ASK, LIKE WTF SERIOUSLY I EXPLICITLY TOLD YOU TO USE GIT.

😣

This is what Git Branches look like while working with an awesome team

Git: the occasionally frustrating, dangerous, and infuriating VCS you can't believe you were living without.

*spends 2 hours actually coding and working on the project*
*remembers hasn't made any commit*
Welp, guess it's time to do the git shit.

alias suicide = git reset --hard

my company uses svn for source control. just found out the guy in charge of the repo actually uses git and just has all developers use svn because "there's less of a learning curve". WHY?!?! Git is so much better!

Git or SVN?

Is git source code versioned on git ?

One of my *co-workers* (intern turned full-time) had his user (the USER) initialised as a git repo. I've officially seen everything.

One day i started to code.

One day i was told you will not code without git.

Many days i lost code on git because i was ignorant.

Today i reset the act of commiting without losing all my shit.

Git reset --soft HEAD^

I didnt event sweat it ;)

Today i feel like half a boss!!!

I know it's not recommended to write git commit messages in past tense, but it makes more sense to me to use it. Maybe I'll change as I grow and learn more in the programmer world, but as for now, I'm going to be a rebel and ignore convention😎

`git push origin master --force`

In case of emergency:
git commit
git push
git out

I think of git as if it was my dog. For added fun name your remote "slippers". Then you can exec "git fetch slippers"

Something to cheer you up mid-week:

> alias yolo='git commit -am "DEAL WITH IT" && git push -f origin master'

JUST DO GIT!

What's your favourite git client and why?

$ git gud --force

Learn git, Learn life! 😊

How hard is it to make a git GUI that is 1) pretty 2) not sluggish 3) bug-free?

That time when your company use subversion for a git repository...

I love git stash.

It's helps a lot for doing refactors to me. I guess it's not the most complex workflow, but it wasn't obvious to me when I started with git. Let me explain.

Refactors. As you start writing the first lines of a refactor, you start to notice something: you're changing too many things, your next commit is going to be huge.

That tends to be the very nature of refactors, they usually affect different parts of code.

So, there you are, with a shitload changes, and you figure "hey, I have a better idea, let me first do a smaller cohesive commit (let's call it subcommit) that changes a smaller specific thing, and then I'll continue with the upper parts of the refactor".

Good idea, but you have a shitload of changes nearly touching every file in your working copy, what do you do with these changes? You git stash them.

Let's say you stash and try to do that smaller "subcommit". What sometimes happens to me at this point is that I notice that I could do an even smaller change inside this current "subcommit". So I do the same thing, I git stash and I work on that even smaller thing.

At some point I end up `git stash pop`ing up all these levels. And it it shows that git stash is powerful for this.

* You never lose a single bit of work you did.
* Every commit is clean.
* After every commit you can run tests (automated or manual) to see shit is still working.
* If you don't like some changes that you had git stashed, you can just erase them with git reset --hard.
* If a change overlaps between a stash you're applying and the last "subcommit", then
if they differ, git shows conflicts on the files,
if they are identical, nothing happens.

with this workflow things just flow and you don't need to wipe out all your changes when doing simpler things,
and you don't need to go around creating new branches with temp commits (which results in bloated temp commits and the work of switching branches).

After you finish the refactor, you can decide to squash things with git rebase.

(Note: I don't use git stash pop, because it annoys the fuck out of me when I pop and you I get conflicts, I rather apply and drop)

Git on VS doesn't want to ignore the files I've added in the .gitignore.

Still no shell for command line.

Well, looks like my changes will be filled with DLL files.

An amazing git story: A month ago coworkers did research and started with merge requests. Their workflow is as follows: A Feature is developed in a branch, then a merge request is opened. After a very short review it will be closed (rejected) and merged without request. (wtf!) After that the develop branch will be tested later, in case of bugs, a new branch per feature is opened.

People who delete a repo and clone again instead of a hard reset because 'they can't undo the changes they made" are the kind of people who shouldn't be using git in the first place.

Cleaning up after yourself if so damn important. Even your git repos:

# always be pruning
git fetch -p

# delete your merged branches
git branch --merged | grep -v master | xargs -n 1 git branch -d

# purge remote branches that are merged
git branch -r --merged | grep -v master | sed 's/origin\///' | xargs -n 1 git push --delete origin

You know you didn't ignore node_modules when 'git add' takes more time than 'git push' on a 3G

The moment you realize your co workers don't really know how to use git....

Why is there `git stash pop` but no `git stash rock`? Come on, man!

Wondering how many people use git cmd and how many use different git clients.

I regularly use git cmd. I made a transition from clients a while back because I wanted to learn more about how it actually works and it works just fine for me, except when I have to google something I don't remember (like how to revert local commit)

Git clients will for sure do abstraction which can be both good and bad, but I'm wondering if there are any definitive pros for clients.

Best git commit messages ever(sarcasm):
- Fixes.
- Changes.
😥

its funny because Git is the fkin master lol

junior be like:

git add
git commit
*wait 0.2 sec*
git push

git log .. I see what you did there

Last comment of git commit: "it works"

Interviewer: Can you rate 0-10 your git skill?

git commit -m suicide

Eclipse and git is real pain in ass

The moment when your git commit date is in the future because git uses your wrong system time

How well do you speak git? Name all commands you know how to use 😄:

init, add, commit, remote, cherrypick, push, rm, rebase, reset, submodule.

Did I miss something?