Girl : I like dangerous men.
Me : I didn't run test cases while committing my changes last night.
Girl : my hero!

Me : *wakes up from the dream*

Check out this superb website that I made..

http://localhost:8080

Does anyone else suddenly lose the ability to type properly as soon as someone is watching/pairing?

"A different error message! Finally some progress!"

Worst part of being a dev?
Unanswered stackoverflow question that exactly matches your problem

*Interview for 6 month placement*

Say you are chosen for the job; where would you see yourself in 5 years?

Why should we hire you?

recruiter:
I see you worked for 5 years at xyz and you used c# but your CV says you used other technologies like sql and you did testing.. So how much of your time was spent writing c#?

me:
Most of the time.. Maybe 60%.

recruiter:
Ok, let me work that out... ok I will put down that you have 3 years c# experience.

Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in five years working in this company?

(The company shut down after 2 years.)

Got this from a recruiter:

We are looking for a **Senior Android Developer/Lead** at Philadelphia PA

Hiring Mode: Contract

Must have skills:

· 10-12 years mobile experience in developing Android applications
· Solid understanding of Android SDK on frameworks such as: UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation, Network Programming, etc.
· Good Knowledge on REST Ful API and JSON Parsing
· Good knowledge on multi-threaded environment and grand central dispatch
· Advanced object-oriented programming and knowledge of design patterns
· Ability to write clean, well-documented, object-oriented code
· Ability to work independently
· Experience with Agile Driven Development
· Up to date with the latest mobile technology and development trends
· Passion for software development- embracing every challenge with a drive to solve it
· Engaging communication skills

My response:

I am terribly sorry but I am completely not interested in working for anyone who might think that this is a job description for an Android engineer.

1. Android was released in September 2008 so finding anyone with 10 years experience now would have to be a Google engineer.
2. UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation are all iOS frameworks
3. Grand Central Dispatch is an iOS mechanism for multithreading and is not in Android
4. There are JSON parsing frameworks, no one does that by hand anymore

Please delete me from your emailing list.

"Are you familiar with uploading your code to Google Drive?"

I left the building at that exact moment.

Linux. Because it's awesome. Period.

Three open windows are all I need:

1. Terminal
2. Chrome
3. Any IDE based on Intellij

Good old terminal. You know why.

Git: Poor man's TARDIS

Anything with Jetbrains on the cover, IDEA, Android Studio, Clion. Can't imagine how I'd work if these IDEs weren't doing half the work for me.

JetBrains IDEs hands down. These folks know what devs need.

Code Completion. Face it, you would've probably made a lot of mistakes if you didn't have it.

Postman anyone? It's the shit.

As much as i love Ubuntu... This is so true.

My eyes started seeing colors in hexes

Coding changed the way I think, made me more confident about my decisions, and ruined my conversation topics.

Coding has turned me into a nocturnal weirdo who talks to rubber ducks more than human beings.

Sometimes I spend hours programming a task that I could do manually in minutes... But no regrets

Date and time is not as simple as I thought they were

I now start my to-do lists with
//TODO:

How has coding impacted your life...?

- Using Linux
- Valuing OpenSorce over cracked software
- Using more CLI than GUI programs
- Only playing games that run on Linux or Wine
- Hating Micro$oft
- Utilizing VMs and Servers
- Tinkering with Hardware (RPi, custom PC)
- ...

... Nah not that much. 🤗😅

Automate all the things 😀

She: I uploaded it on FB.
Me: Why on Firebase?

When i was 16 i said fuck school, i will be a game developer. Of course everyone said noop, you will not, grow up. Now i am 20 and a game developer with a highly paid job. The people said to grow up are either unemployed or doing shitty jobs. Also i never finished school :D