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I just lost faith in the entire management team of the company I'm working for.
Context: A mid sized company with
- a software engineering departmant consisting of several teams working on a variety of products and projects.
- a project management department with a bunch of project managers that mostly don't know shit about software development or technical details of the products created by engineering.
Project management is unhappy about the fact that software engineering practically never sticks to the plan regarding cost, time and function that was made at the very beginning of the project. Oh really? Since when does waterfall project management work well? As such they worked out a great idea how to improve the situation: They're going to implement *Shopfloor Management*!
Ever heared about Shopfloor Management? Probably not, because it is meant for improving repetitive workflows like assembly line work. In a nutshell it works by collecting key figures, detecting deviation in these numbers and performing targeted optimization of identified problem areas. Of course, there is more to Shopfloor Management, but that refers largely to the way the process just described is to be carried out (using visualisation boards, treating the employee well, let them solve the actual problem instead of management, and so on...). In any case, this process is not useful for highly complex and hard-to-predict workflows like software development.
That's like trying to improve a book author's output by measuring lines of text per day and fixing deviations in observed numbers with a wrench.
Why the hell don't they simply implement something proven like Scrum? Probably because they're affraid of losing control, affraid of self managed employees, affraid of the day everybody realizes that certain management layers are useless overhead that don't help in generating value but only bloat.
Fun times ahead!8
Whaaaat? That used to be my default audio player for local music 😠. I'm not going to upload my mp3 file collection to YouTube to be able to listen to them at work...36
Have children and build a house. You will forget what you enjoyed doing in your free time. Because you will not have any more!
P. S. I could have attached my github activity graph instead, but that is even more embarrassing 😭8
So it happened that a roll of my office chair broke. Since the ordering process in our company is a nightmare and takes forever AND my employer is too cheap to buy enough adequate replacement, I had to draw and print a spare part myself...9
My very first computer had a bunch of CDs with tons of random freeware, shareware and demos. One of these happened to be an awesome graphics demo called Second Reality from Future Crew ( https://youtu.be/rFv7mHTf0nA check it out! ).
This demo was the reason I became addicted to programming back in the days and I started with QBasic, Power Basic, Pascal, assembler using MSDOS "debug" command (worst assembler out there!), and several strange C dialects like C-- (I found it hard to get hands on affordable compilers and totally missed Linux until several years later).
Delphi and Visual Basic accompanied me quite some time until I finally found the language which perfectly met my needs until today : C++
This was all way before I started to study ☺️1
Who the fuck invented Hungarian notation?
lpszName, bVisible, pNext, ppData...
A variable's type should already be clear by its name and scope. If not, get yourself some decent IDE that helps you out. Why this style is still in use in code like the Vulkan API is beyond me... IT IS NOT USEFUL!3
You sitting at your colleagues Windows developer box, tossing some random window around while waiting for a build... and suddenly all 20+ windows get minimized.
Most useless feature ever!7
Happened to me a while ago:
co-worker: don't use (C++) templates so your colleagues who aren't as smart as you don't have such a hard time understanding your code.
me: said the guy who uses macros all over the place.
co-worker: macros have been around for years and you can expect one to understand those.
me: *tempted to start a discussion about C++ with one who started programming with C like 20 years ago and who doesn't give a fuck about learning new things*... You're right!4
When you ask the PM which one of two projects is of higher priority because there isn't enough time to complete both and he responds "of course project A is of higher priority but project B needs to be finished by next week! *leaves room*"7