Programming commandment: Thou shall blame all bad code on thy comrade who has bequeathed your company!

So my landlord just came up and asked why I'm using so much bandwidth (they've just had a new line installed so they're monitoring it like hell for some reason) so we had a chat, I told him I'm a Web Developer so I'm uploading and downloading a load, and bare in mind this is student housing, he offered to install a wired connection in my flat only so I'll have a decent and stable connection when all the other students come back in September.

This is the first time in my life I feel like I'm not paying enough rent!

Need to think a different way to motivate GoLang team ;)

When you try to get BIOS..

My job is so f**king unbelievable.

I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless.
The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on make-up.
She is extremely self-centred and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself.
She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet.
Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10.
I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her "womanly" parts.
I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store she moans like a cat in heat.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fucking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead.
In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work.
He probably hasn't been sober any time in the last ten years, and he's only 22.
He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big f**king dog to work.
Every f**king day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke.
Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing.
Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonald's and Burger King, every single f**king day.

Anyway, I drive these dicks around in my van and we solve mysteries and s**t.

Do I look like a hardware technician? Didn't think so.

Two tasks at the top of the backlog that was approved by the scrum master, and pm. We finish them in a few hours. Pm comes out.

Pm: Why are you guys working on those tickets!?!?!
Us: because they are the first things in the list.
Pm: but the client hasn't agreed on the work yet.
Us: then why is it the top of our list!!!
Pm: cause it's important.