Interview with a candidate. He calls himself "C++ expert" on his resume. I think: "oh, great, I love C++ too, we will have an interesting conversation!"

Me: let's start with an easy one, what is 'nullptr'?
Him: (...some undecipherable sequence of words that didn't make any sense...)

In my mind: mh, probably I didn't understand right. Let's try again with something simple and more generic

Me: can you tell me about memory management in C++?
Him: you create objects on the stack with the 'new' keyword and they get automatically released when no other object references them

In my mind: wtf is this guy talking about? Is he confusing C++ with Java? Does he really know C++? Let's make him write some code, just to be sure

Me: can you write a program that prints numbers from 1 to 10?

Ten minutes and twenty mistakes later...

Me: okay, so what is this <int> here in angle brackets? What is a template?
Him: no idea

Me: you wrote 'cout', why sometimes do I see 'std::cout' instead? What is 'std'?
Answer: no idea, never heard of 'std'

I think: on his resume he also said he is a Java expert. Let's see if he knows the difference between the two. He *must* have noticed that one is byte-compiled and the other one is compiled to native code! Otherwise, how does he run his code? He must answer this question correctly:

Me: what is the difference between Java and C++? One has a Virtual Machine, what about the other?
Him: Java has the Java Virtual Machine
Me: yes, and C++?
Him: I guess C++ has a virtual machine too. The C++ Virtual Machine

Me (exhausted): okay, I don't have any other questions, we will let you know

And this is the story of how I got scared of interviews

  • 31
    Plot twist: that was bored Rob Pike acting like he knows nothing about C++ just to challenge his power of will
  • 54
    Plot twist: The candidate is going to rewrite the interview in a way making you look like the idiot for now knowing of the c++vm and asking for his coat as ransom
  • 17
    Me: What's C++?
    Him: A software? I don't know
  • 37
    Plot twist: There is no plot twist.
  • 25
    -What is the difference between C and C++?
    ~Well, in C++ you can make the sum
  • 36
    > The C++ Virtual Machine

    Where dreams go to die
  • 14
    @Alice I've just noticed that C++ means C=C+1;
    Coincidences? I don't think so
  • 6
    As long as the quantity of all bits on all computers in the world is finite, every function in existence is pure if you consider that global state as it's only input.

    *music plays*

  • 3
    @Alice Illuminati. They wrote C and then created Matrix
  • 19
    C# is actually C++++, but four pluses look like #

    *music plays*
  • 12
    How come you call yourself an expert in C++ and have no fucking clue about C++'s VM?


  • 17
    @Alice of course not, you little newbie. Everyone knows that C is machine learning reactive ui language that runs in the browser, C++ is what Medium guys invented with their paid graphql virtual machine that available via adobe creative cloud subscription, and C# is blockchain database that stores everything in svg. I thought they teach this in schools! That's basics!
  • 22
    Me: what is C++?
    Answer: ‘D’?
  • 13
    So he created the c++ garbage collector and a c++ virtual machine.

    You should hire that genius!

  • 1
    "expert" 🤣
  • 2
    @uyouthe that's not actually true. The # is meant to be the music sharp symbol which indicates the note should be slightly higher.

    So like C++ used ++ to denote it was an increment of C, C# is an increment of C++.

    Next one could be C {up arrow} for an example.
  • 4
    @Alice specialising in rural development.
  • 7
    Pretty sure he is a competitive programmer
  • 19
    Oh don't worry, I got tested recently I'm clean.
  • 7
    @LynxMagnus there's nothing 'slightly higher' in the #; it clearly denotes that it should be half a note higher, thus placing C# directly between C and C++ ;)
  • 1
    "the C++ virtual machine"

    I literally laughed out loud at that. XD
  • 5
    plot twist - when I see this phrase I always imagine a wooden fence that has been twisted in some way because plot means fence in Slovak 😂😂😂
  • 4
    Devil's advocate.

    C++ standard is defined in terms of an abstract machine and not any concrete implementation of one. I mean it's definitely not a VIRTUAL machine, but perhaps he was confused.

    Or he was a dumbass, probably a dumbass.
  • 1
    @Blake #shewantstheD
  • 1
    We also need to make sure objects memory is allocated on heap not stack
  • 1
    Java++ is the next iteration of Java we'll all have to learn in the future.
  • 1
    Story of many I know , can relate to them 😂
  • 1
    plot twist... this actually never happened. Just a made up story for ++'s
  • 0
    This hurts me emotionally
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