Super depressed rn and nobody to talk to about it. Stupid life problems. Can’t seem to learn new tech so if I lost my job I’d have to switch to landscaping or something. Can’t talk normal with people without someone taking offense at something I never dreamed could be offensive (stupid cancel culture) or trying to shut me down. Friends ending friendships and family cutting me out of their lives without communication as to why. My kids just don’t seem to care about anything I have to try to teach or share with them anymore. Nothing I do seems to matter to anyone or make a difference even when I’m trying to do good things for people. I don’t want to take my life but tbh if COVID got me I wouldn’t even be mad. I’d embrace it as my get out of jail free card.

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    Please dont think about suicide. Make a mental note in your head to always choose life, cling to it. Good times can be rare but they come. If you need to talk to someone call helpline. Dont give a crap what others think. They usually get consumed by their own problems. Find just one thing that makes you happy and concentrate on that for a start.
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    Just hang in there. It'll pass.

    (Get these moods from time to time, too - have predisposition for clinical depression, so I try to be occupied and active, spend a lot of time with my son, some sports, do things I like - don't waste much time in social media. - These recipes work most of the time)
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    Go hang out with nature. Watch and play with animals or go to forest watch how everything lives around.
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    ++ to give support..

    Don't despair. Don't give up.
    These times are fucked even for the ones with good mental health..
    Seek professional help if you can.
    If not, or even if you can, work on yourself, give yourself a break.
    Find a new hobby, be it knitting if nothing else, something to keep your hands & mind occupied. If you have the option take a walk in nature.
    Try meditating, it will be annoying at first but once you get the routine up, it can do wonders for your psyche.
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    It’s not YOU who can’t communicate with people. It’s not YOU whom your friends and family are cutting connections with.

    It’s just chemistry inside your head. It alters your personality, that’s how mental illnesses work. There is no thought process to overcome it, can’t access CPU registers from the web browser.

    Physically bring your body to a psychiatrist before it’s too late. There is new medications now such as Vortioxetine, it did wonders to my depression. Doctors will cure you.
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    Im also really depressed rn, but I've decided to go to try and solve it by going to a psychologist. Just the thought about getting help made the last few days bearable, even if the help wouldn't be much of a help. Losing connection with your family and friends may not even be what it seems like. Asking them haven't helped? Also I am 100 percent sure your kids care about you, because they are your kids nevermind how do you feel. Stay strong.
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    literally nothing you could say to me would offend me. this is clown world after all.

    believe it or not landscaping is great work. you'll feel better after one day of it then you would finishing a week of code. just physically better. officespace wasnt lying about that. only issue is we're heading toward fall so the work in that sector might not be as great.

    what tech is giving you trouble?

    I wont say "if you think you got it bad, imagine how much worse others have it."

    Instead: if you think you have it bad, it might just be because you do. Then once you ask that, the next thing to ask is "exactly in what way do I have it bad?"
    And after that, make a list of things that make you happy or grateful. Try to include today as well.

    A lot of unhappiness comes from our own expectations of the way we think things *should* be. read that again to be clear.

    a universal remedy I've found for unhappiness is to take a nap.

    go take a nap and when you get back tell me how you're feeling then.
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    Please get help as soon as you can. I find that talking to a therapist (someone who is not involved in my life and would provide less biased opinions) help. I think it's better if you can talk face to face but if that's not possible, there are apps out there that might work for you. Wysa is the cheapest one I found. Give it a shot and see if it works.
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    We can be accidentally offendin buds gang. I have quite an impressive record of footmouthing myself.

    There are a lot of entry points out there if you want to bring this up with someone, and none of them is going to think you're just being silly.
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    Thanks, everyone. It was nice hearing these encouraging words from strangers. I watched some “life after life” videos about near death experiences and got some hope from experiencers who noted that staying and not leaving is the better choice. Got to save some money up for some more counseling.
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    @stackodev I think its like $100 for two hours or something.

    maybe we could do a small fundraiser.
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    Thanks for the offer. I’m ok though. Just have to pay off a recent round of credit card purchases to fix all the vehicles and appliances that decided to break down all at the same time.
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    @stackodev hey man if I end up releasing my game, would it be cool to use it to fund raise a little for you?

    Because there was a point in my life where I needed help and no one was there and I couldnt afford it. So I know a little bit about what its like to be in your shoes.

    A lot of people arent comfortable with that kind of attention and unasked for assistance. Just thought I'd ask.
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    @Wisecrack I do appreciate it. I would feel more comfortable if it were donated to a suicide help line or mental health organization.
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    @Wisecrack What game?
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    @rutee07 have a game thats in on and off development. "Atomic Ranger" think fallout meets rimworld. Got some banging old tunes, focusing on a solid conversation system (speech was always lacking in fallout) and dynamic npcs and environments.

    edit: heres one of the early mockups. dont have any screenshots on my phone atm.
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    @Wisecrack Very NES-like. Me likey.
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    @rutee07 it plays smoother than it looks at least in terms of controls. im a big fan of dont starve, neoscav, roguelikes and a few others so I take those influences wherever I go. Complex ui can be fun but makes for poor screenshots.

    focused on survival elements and crafting atm. Want to put emphasis on maintaining equipment, and click-dragging or otherwise combining items to craft and discover new recipes or combinations.

    what fallout lacked was speech never seemed to have lasting long term consequences so I working on making that a big part. speech follow s an "event -> outcome > consequence" model.

    you might have to deal with raiders preparing to attack a town. you could convince them to go elsewhere, but then the new target faction will hate you. or provoke them to attack the wrong target setting them up for defeat. or fail and have them settle in to a conquered town and then gain positive rep with them for "being so kind as to invite us in!" for example.

    ideas mostly atm.
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    fuck me. didnt realize id slipped into advert mode, on someone elses thread.

    im such an asshole. my apologies OP.
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