Got into the monday tech meeting, CTO be like: we lost 10% of users due to last version, terrible I know, but that's really valuable data, I want you to find out why they left.

Found this shop while taking a holiday in Mallorca.

Ah, I see you studies music in college! Why don't you work in information security!

Did you know that london heathrow terminal self check-in system is powered by windows 7?

Well, just want to say that being a data scientist is a great career, and I love teslas

So this is why my train is always late.

Oh look, it's your friendly hackers from Liverpool.

Before and after wannacry, lol

Insufficient Coffee OR Tea

Welcome to UK Boarder control. I did recommend www.downloadmoreram.com

All I want for Christmas is NULL and maybe coffee, always low on coffee...

So the dev team got invited to a management team meeting. First order of business: Happy Birthday Betty!!! Yey!! Second on the agenda: How's you son Dylan doing at school? Yey!?!? After fucking around for 25 minutes: why are the development team here? OHH! We didn't mean to invite you, must be a mistake. WELL FUCK YOU, AND YOUR SON DYLAN AND YOUR BIRTHDAY BETTY, YOU THINK WASTING OUR FUCKING TIME IS FUN!?

Every time I look at someone elses code, and try to do it just as nice.

Here you go, I just made you a king, and oh, here's some crabgrass.

Not checked my mail box since Thanks Giving, just opened my mail box to find 1600+ of these black friday promotion mother fuckers.

Don't worry, ur not late, ur on time.

I'm giving these out to the trick or treaters, do you think they'll be happy? They say that knowledge is worth more than sweets in my country!

Brains are the true sexy.

Repost by me, but it just fits this week's rant, cuz it's wet.

Nobel peace prize eh? I say true peace can only be achieved on devrant.

f*** you JS

So here I am in iceland watching Aurora with my gf, and suddenly I realized somewhere in my code at work I freaking forgot to add 1 to the denominator of a fraction. Shitty shit shit, gonna go back to work finding NaNs everywhere. Fuck fuck fuck

me: Dad I got a job! It's...

dad: great! you can help pay mortgage!

me: oh shit, should have said nothing..

I usually use cumsum

time will tell

enough said

Friend: My other friend said he hacked into the Pentagon, can you do it?
Me: ummm No
Friend: So you are not really a good developer then?
Me: ummm No...I guess
Friend: well I'm hanging out with that guy then, he is showing me ways to make hundreds of $ a day online.
Me: sigh...

so I left uni after my PhD and joined a start up where the boss is a Cambridge grad who does coding and is like 50 years old (he never told us the true value), the CTO is very talented and another dev who quickly became my best friend and me doing data science. the 4 of us worked together like friends and the efficiency was fantastic, there's no bureaucracy bullshit or shit boss talks. We built the whole thing from scratch (okay I admit they did most of the building) and to this day, we work just has we have been.

Last hour Friday before leaving office.

CUDA!!!! your documentation is a whole bunch of Wingdings you piece of **** !!