Manual Garbage cleaner in java.

You guys ever spent a longer period of time on finding a bug and once you found it, first go grab a coffee/snack to allow that bug some final moments?

Like some sick kind of power play along the lines of “I will fix you at a time and location of my choosing”

* Initial Interview*

HR: We do offer remote job, lots of benefits and annual increase of salary.

Supervisor: "Oh... Those things HR mentioned? That's just a lie. We're just complying on the government requirements"

Dev from other team asked me for a code I had previously written. I emailed it.

Dev: Thanks, I received it but am not able to open the .py file

Me: Try using Microsoft Word.

We hired a developer and he has very minimal experience. I feel most of our conversations end up going something like this.

New Guy: I'm not sure how to do this obvious task and I'm incapable of searching Google.

Me: Give me your hand so I can hold it and walk you through the process of copying and pasting code from stack overflow.

New Guy: Ok...give you my hand...right...how do I do that?

FML

"Hey, at least it fly" ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Designing those new smart urinals. Not that the job itself would be all that horrible but imagine having to tell people...

What do you do for a living?

I'm a software developer.

Oh so your like hackerman?

Nah more like hackerjon.

Well what software have you developed, anything I might've seen?

Idk when's the last time you had to use the restroom at the mall?

Just the other day, why?

Well did you enjoy seeing ads while you pissed? Your welcome.

😂😂😂😂

God I'm fucking done for today.

We just finished a "Climate-conference-simulation" in school.

Basically ~90 students split into 6 groups representing a delegation of a country or a group of countries.

EU,
USA,
India,
China,
Other developing countries,
Other industrial countries

The target of our efforts was the reduction of global warming from ~4 C° by 2100 to around 2 C°.

My group (USA) elected me to speak and represent (I did kind of mimic the American stereotype of being egoistic and self centered, no offence intended)

As all the other nations and groups were planning great schemes, my group simply continued to put, well, basically rocks in their path by not playing along cause aforementioned stereotype.

It's the working phase after the second presentation of results, I'm sitting there with parts of the Chinese and EU delegation and suddenly two of my friends, in different groups, put my hood over my head, drag/carry me out of the assembly hall, toss me out and leave me there.

Was funny and all, but damn, it's fucking exhausting to stand in front of around 100 people (including teachers and stuff) and completely not play along with the other group's opinions and plans.

But hey, I've been congratulated a lot of times cause I've perfectly stayed in my role.

Yes it was weird

Opening up a view file, and first thing I see is a function accepting 13 parameters.

I don't know where to start, so much wrong..

Kill me.

To all the programmers calling “ToString()” on variables that are already of type String....

Please stop.

CORS is the most annoying shit ever seen...

Suck dicks Microsoft... Get choked.
All I wanted to do was to uninstall this piece of crapware.

And now you're telling me i need to UPDATE the installer in order to uninstall.

What the fuck, what obscure substances have you been smoking lately? imbicile numbskull maniacs.

Get assigned ticket.
Finish the most of the feature. Finish most of the specs.
Push.

Second dev wants to own accounting half of the ticket.
Rip out half my changes, rewrite specs.
Push.

Code review asks for minor changes.
Finish them.
Push.

Product creep creeps the scope.
Finish the feature again.
Push.

Product creep creep-creeps the scope.
Finish the feature again.
Push.

New release happens.
Merge in master; fix conflicts. Run specs; random unrelated specs fail, some fail intermittently. Rabbit holes of complicated, unexplored, obviously-flawed code.
Fuck that. Push.

Doing StackOverflow.com survey in the honest way.

Y'all mother fuckers who use "don't re-invent the wheel" as a tactic to not grow new neurons, as if a ceiling's there — fuck out of my circle.

Those mother fuckers have never even created a single wheel - ever!

Well, ima re-invent any fucking wheel I want, when and where. How I learn is not your fucking busy.

What's even more annoying is that those telling me that shit are pretty much part of the paint on the wall and damn unemployable any where on this earth.

Completely switched to linux now when I do development. It's a fucken bliss.

Larry Tesler, a computer scientist who created the terms "cut," "copy," and "paste," has passed away at the age of 74 (17 Feb 2020).

In 1973, Tesler took a job at the Xerox Palo Alto Research Center (PARC) where he worked until 1980. Xerox PARC is famously known for developing the mouse-driven graphical user interface and during his time at the lab Tesler worked with Tim Mott to create a word processor called Gypsy that is best known for coining the terms "cut," "copy," and "paste".

In addition to "cut," "copy," and "paste" terminologies, Tesler was also an advocate for an approach to UI design known as modeless computing. It ensures that user actions remain consistent throughout an operating system's various functions and apps. When they've opened a word processor, for instance, users now just automatically assume that hitting any of the alphanumeric keys on their keyboard will result in that character showing up on-screen at the cursor's insertion point. But there was a time when word processors could be switched between multiple modes where typing on the keyboard would either add characters to a document or alternately allow functional commands to be entered.

FUCK capitalist greed! I have befallen to their tricks once again. The daily dosage on my gummy vitamins was three a day but the total gummies in the container wasn't divisible by three so I had to buy three containers and eat one from each per day!

Sharepoint dev.