Why do people who put camera's on always insist others must do so as well? I don't mind when it's a special meeting like a retro or some form of team building thing, but I cannot be assed during standup - that MFer is meant to be over after 10 minutes. You guys go on an hour-long tangent, while I'm busy writing code, chatting to people and getting shit done, do you really need to see me not paying attention to the issues with the PHP project that are there because client X did something stupid. I'm already rolling my eyes while listening right now. Also, I don't want to put a "good" shirt on for 20 minutes to an hour meeting.

It supports recognition of the other human and helps with attention and understanding the participants by reading their body language. It also helps with keeping rude people from interrupting

Must admit, and I must be biased, how is that still a topic in IT?

I don't even have a webcam.

Sorry I use a real computer, not your shitty LaPToP

Reminds me they gave me a mac book when I started. I think I left it in my old appartment

@scor Sure, but this is meant to be a 10 minute call. It's why I said I'm fine with it in retros and the like

Yeah, the 'cam required' weirds me out.

Gimme some privacy.

Also, using a desktop that has no camera, so yeah...

@scor Because people that thrive in IT usually do it because they get to be away from people. The people that thrive in management usually thrive on human interaction. Those types use their power to force their extroversion on unwilling participants or else be punished for it.

Just say "no", and don't explain. Explanations can be picked apart, but the word "no" can't. Works every time. If they ask "why not?" just don't answer.

@kiki Bingo! I gave up explaining why I do things the way I do them a long time ago because the other person almost never cares one bit why I do things the way I do them. All they want is compliance.

When words are required, and they almost never really are, "No" is a perfectly valid response for literally all interactions.

Get a separate webcam. Fuck up the lens and say your webcam is "broken".

Or put a fucked up filter that makes you look extremely happy or sad.

@Demolishun for bonus points, fuck up the lens of your main webcam.

@Demolishun I have a virtual webcam set up in OBS that has a gif of my monogram icon bouncing around the frame like a DVD logo.

@cuddlyogre

https://youtube.com/watch/...

better link queued up a bit:

https://youtu.be/r8qMY-GdjUI?t=83

@Demolishun https://m.youtube.com/watch/...

company I worked for remotely last had in their guides that everyone must have their cameras on in the meetings. first meeting I had we had cameras on because we were introducing but then later on the lead dev turned off her camera all the time... and not to rock the boat I started not turning mine on either because I didn't want to be the odd one out in those meetings, as she was the boss and people were following her

well. that whole stint ended badly. it seems like she projected her fears and worries on me when I'd write her text, and I think similarly she saw me as a bitter person even in those meetings... because without a camera her imagination ran rampant

so while I don't hallucinate people's intentions in text (I grew up mired in it as a kid), I find a lot of people have issues with text especially from people they don't know well, and it seems this issue compounds if they don't even get to see your face on camera

I thought "remote is hard" was dumb, but now I get it

@kiki you'd think but instead what happened to me is the manager chased me around the office asking the question repeatedly as I kept repeatedly saying no and dodging her. then it got worse... then she started group-games and peer pressure, rumours, etc

when someone has no shame and a will to use you, they'll stop at nothing, basically

@jestdotty your bad experience with applying the tactic says more about the recipients than the tactic

@kiki My boss would accept that (and has) this is the client's CTO though, I ended up just pointing the camera at the ceiling and everyone had a laugh, I'll soon just "forget" to turn it on again

@jestdotty yup people like that suck. Current PM sucks in comms in general, but is less likely to blow up if it's in a call.

@BordedDev the word "no" knows no position and no allegiance. it's universal

@kiki And can be used by both parties