Manager on the meeting room suddenly talking to me:
Coffe2Code, share your screen please to show us the progress.

Me: *minifies all windows fastly and plugs the laptop to the big screen *

Manager : we start with documentation, open the world file that you sent to me.

Me: *opens word*
Word: *freezing on my CV that I was editing for another job application*

Me: ...
Manager: ...

Word: oh everyone seen the CV? cool here your document

What happened next?

Brilliant! Passive agressive - we love it!!!

Inb4 a raise.

@Quirinus actually after I asker for a ruse and they refused

what's CV?

@jameshuker47 Resume, basically

https://indeed.com/career-advice/...

@jallman112 It's help a lot. thanks, man

You changed the name or @coffee2code went away?

@gitlog no, I was lazyDev, then I changed my name to Coffe2Code (it's a typo)

That fucking freezing shit. A few years ago I had dinner with what was back then my girlfriend and her parents at their house. It was a nice evening that dragged on until after midnight with dessert and all. When our bellies were full and it was probably around 00:30 at night, my gf's mother asked me to switch on the TV to see if X (I can't remember what she asked for) was on. Their house had a large open surface where kitchen and living room is pretty much one big open space, so they all had front row seats to me switching on the TV. To my horror the frames that met my retinas was those of brutal coitus. A nice big close up of nothing but a penis pumping away into an organic cave. I immediately switched the channel, and then... The Freeze. The longest four seconds or so of my life, before the channel finally fucking changed.

@NOPSledRider oh good God I would have crawled under a rock. I can feel the pain in this