20
nikolayy
29d

Java is so fucking stupid. Literally nobody likes Java. Fucking stupid ass language and every app that uses it is laggy and stupid as fuck. Fuck you Oracle. This is why literally nobody uses your cloud platform. Stupid deprecated shit that nobody uses anymore.

Anyone that uses Java is forced to because the software ware literally made 949349 years ago. Java is just such a stupid language and so fucking laggy. NOBODY LIKES JAVA VIRTUAL MACHINE. WHAT A STUPID INVENTION. WHOEVER DID THAT NEEDS TO BE FIRED ASAP. Oracle is such a stupid company. Make something that people actually want to use, because obviously nobody wants to fucking use Java. Nasty ass laggy fucking language.

Fuck you

Comments
  • 15
    I like java 👀 ☕️

    Let me add some context.
    I have been emotionally and mentally abused by PHP devs for 15 years, Java does what php does not, somewhat enforces some good code. 😍
  • 6
    > Fuck you Oracle
    > Oracle is such a stupid company

    First you had my attention, now you have my respect.

    Thank you for posting a good rant. And welcome aboard.
  • 5
    Incoming @netikras in 3...2...1...

    @F1973 as much as I dislike Oracle as a company, I have to admit GraalVM is pretty kickass.
  • 8
    Now, this is just plain stupid. No language gets to be widely in use as Java if its crap. No offence, but I usually find people blindly hating on a language to be hollow inside their head. Either they don't understand where / how the language is supposed to be used or they are just trying to "emulate" another language. If you want Java to be structured the same way as Python or C, then that's your fault.

    That said, JavaScript is definitely FUCKING STUPID
  • 2
    java has its reasons to exist as many other language. depends what you ise it for.
    that being said, javascript is indeed fucking stupid
  • 3
    Oracle didn't create Java, they acquired Sun. You can blame them for a lot of negligence after the take-over though. I am not a Java fan, I agree that it felt laggy a long time before it came under the Oracle umbrella and I generally dislike it.

    Change camps, move over to .NET or something else that doesn't shit you off. Simple.
  • 0
    @kleopi Javascript is "assembly for the web". It has a purpose, just as you pointed out Java has.
  • 1
  • 1
    @SupressWarnings Isn't JavaScript widely used too?
  • 1
    @F1973 Ever heard of irony? ;)
  • 2
    @SupressWarnings Ever heard of self woooosh? Well now you have.

    On a side note, I will be moving to Nepal where I intend to live as a goat for rest of my life.
  • 0
    ... Have you tried Kotlin? 😐
  • 3
    This is a weird site. Even the URL says "rant" but if you do rant, you get dozens of guys educating the original poster on how he's the one that's stupid and how the thing X is actually wonderful.

    We should have some basic rules here. If someone rants, he has a good reason. So, either you agree with him or you shut the fuck up.
  • 1
    @thatDude That is a very good point, thank you!

    @remeberme - My guess is that you didn't expect that :)
  • 0
    @RememberMe I still hate it.
  • 0
    @thatDude that dude? That fucking dude?

    Holy shit broo!!!! You back too.

    This will be awesome
  • 1
    @F1973 , or you are confusing me to otherDude? There could also be noNotThatDudeButTheOtherDudeYouKnow. We live in difficult times.
  • 0
    @thatDude Floyd never gets confused ;)
  • 1
    I personally don't like Java but the JVM is actually very nice so Kotlin is my way to roll now :D
  • 0
    JavaScript delivered what Java had promised and failed to achieve: write once, run everywhere.

    Java's Browser applets were always a major security problem because the sandbox was never really working.

    That wasn't an issue for desktop Java because nobody used the sandbox, and that's because C++ programs didn't even have anything like that, which was deemed acceptable.

    However, desktop Java is also pretty much dead, not least because nobody wants to update the JVM every so many months and have shit breaking. That's because the downwards compatibility that Java promised also failed in real life.

    It didn't help that Java desktop applications were often slow as molasses (like Eclipse) and looked like shit everywhere.

    That leaves Java as backend language where it shines because there are enough devs available, and the JVM performance is good because the startup time is irrelevant, and thanks to JIT compilation after some runs, it's pretty fast.
  • 0
    What's a Java? (TM)
  • 3
    @SupressWarnings @SuppressHate("Java")
  • 3
    @thatDude @netikras while I agree with the sentiment, there's plenty of room for both appreciation of the rant (shown by the ++s) and for others to voice their opinions about it, possibly giving OP a way out of their predicament or everybody learning something they didn't know. I usually take it in the spirit of "ahh yes, but {xyz}". If you think differently, sure.
  • 2
    @RememberMe Yeah, and there's a difference between venting valid frustrations and saying things which are demonstrably false. If I wanted saying I don't like Haskell because it's loosely typed, then I'd expect some stick for that too...
  • 1
    Java isn't actually THAT bad imo
  • 0
    @karanp3 True, it is basically like C# except that it is ugly as fuck and controlled by the most evil company that ever existed.

    Microsoft embracing opensource and releasing dotnet core for linux basically killed the last reason to use java
  • 0
    I've been trying out as many languages as possible just to get the basic idea of each and Java is the one I like the least so far. I really don't get the appeal either but apparently it was convenient in the 90's
  • 1
    @ArtOfBBQ let me put it to you this way. Is a screw driver better than a hammer?
  • 1
    @SupressWarnings if you want to inflict the most pain possible i think the ranking is
    1) Java
    2) Hammers
    3) Screwdrivers
  • 0
    @ItsNotMyFault Nah. I would say, screwdrivers win over hammers
  • 1
    @F1973 lmfao same, I’m in that club too
  • 0
    @Bubbles Which club?
  • 0
    @SupressWarnings

    What kind of project would make you think 'we should do this in Java, it's the perfect tool' though?
  • 1
    @ArtOfBBQ I'd pick it up if I had to build a REST API along with Spring framework or Spring Boot.
  • 1
    @F1973 the fuck Oracle club
  • 1
    @F1973 LMFAO really?
  • 1
    @Bubbles Unfortunately stuck here bro. Someone get me out of this trash place.
  • 1
    @F1973 my condolences 😅
  • 1
    @Bubbles lol thanks. Hopefully I should be out soon.
  • 1
    @ArtOfBBQ java is a fine language. Its verbosity is usually a turnoff for most but after a while it doesn't even feel that much.
    I have ditched it tho for a better language, but in my earlier experience with android and general programming, its simplicity and structured nature helped me focus on the important concepts more than fighting with the language.

    Of course everyone is entitled to have an opinion. I just feel hating the language is senseless, much like hating a red screwdriver and liking a blue screwdriver.
    (But as @SupressWarnings said , FUCK JAVASCRIPT)
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