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When you install Java it says "3 billion devices run java"
Well I'm not sure how many of those devices actually respond11 -
He's stop writing Java because he thinks Java is inelegant. He write PHP instead.
Am I still on earth? 🤔28 -
So I've got a friend learning Java, using Eclipse.
I walk in one day and see him restarting his computer. I make nothing of it. Few minutes later, he's restarting again.
I jokingly say "Windows update?"
He responds with the straightest face ever: "No, compiling code."
Apparently he thought you needed to restart the computer before compiling.
Not sure if I should be mortified or laughing my ass off.5 -
java - - version
Unrecognized operation: - - version
FUCK!!!
java - version
java version "1.x...."
EVERY FUCKING TIME!!!
Why Java, WHY?!?!? 😭
Every other tool uses - - version ❤️9 -
My new year's resolution:
- Learn more Java
- Build a web server with Java
- Make a 3D game with no frameworks in Java
- Make a simple Android app with java
- Try JavaOS
- Tell people I know Java14 -
What?!?
There is an ^= operator in Java for booleans. I have been programming in Java for 4 years now and never knew this. Like b ^= true will flip b.
Mind blown; this is the greatest thing ever14 -
After heck a lot of hours of debugging my Java code which looked all right, found out my mistake was just using == instead of equals()
5 -
After a long time in .NET and JavaScript, I have returned to Java today. I was quite happy about it for a few minutes!3
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Why in the name of Donald Knuth did you think it was a good idea to have a 1500 line Java Method? What THE HELL WERE YOU SMOKING THE ENTIRE FILE IS OVER 3000 LINES AND HALF OF THEM ARE COMMENTED OUT!
Don't even get me started on your "unit tests" which is a massive 5000 line behemoth that randomly has massive swaths of code commented out.
And of course no solution like this would be complete with you HARD CODING EVERY F****INIG STRING IN EVERY TIME!
And it's not like you don't know how to use classes as you have several of them, every single one of which is over 500+ lines and consists of only getters and setters. LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO A MAP! REALLY WHY WOULD YOU USE 500 LINES FOR A CLASS THAT IS JUST GETTERS AND SETTERS?!
The part that really burns me about all of this though, isn't the fact that you sent it to me when I was running into a similar issue, and said "check this out it should help", what bothers me most isn't the indescribable rage I felt looking at your code, the part that really really really bothers me is that you are a veteran with over 15 years in Java development, and according to the org chart are a lead senior engineer getting paid substantially more than me, whereas I am considered a lowly mid-level developer, who isn't worth promoting to your level.
On the plus side you are now going to be featured on theDailyWTF so congrats on the notoriety.7 -
I was once at my uncle's 40th birthday party and bored to hell, so he gave me a book that was supposed to be "Python for kids". I started reading it and soon fell in love with programming.
Since then I've often learned new programming languages by reading books or lately mostly the internet.
My books here should be in chronological order:
7 -
Either I bumped my head really hard, I’ve died and I’m in hell, or something crazy because I’m actually kinda enjoying Java.19
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The biggest annoyance in Java for me is the absence of "real" properties. Writing getters and setters everywhere is ugly, you are generating them anyways.7
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"I decided to write the core software for my Time Machine in Java. It's Date API is so error free and easy to use."
As the legend goes, the scientist is trapped in another dimension between Timezones.
#thanksjava4 -
Went in to the therapist today. Their impression is I'm likely okay. Wait until I show them the cluster fuck that is Java Enterprise. 🙃11
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"Java uninstalling itself Windows 7"
https://superuser.com/q/1492961/...
The garbage collector is working! :D3 -
Why don't people like Java? With only a year of AP comp sci for experience, I don't know enough about it to say I do or don't like it. But it's widely used, and is an official language of Android. Are the people hating on Java just people that don't use it? Or is there something about Java that people just genuinely despise?35
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I was assigned my first ever huge software project in college (a complex board game made in only pure java) and was assigned a group by my professor. Since I'm doing well in the class, I was given kids who want me to teach them everything (from GitHub to simple oop) on top of programming most of the system because they can't or don't want to. So to make things easier I gave out some relatively simple and specific jobs in GitHub using the issues system that apparently nobody reads. Thankfully one person decided to take initiative and start their feature but one commit later the entire system crashed and everything is broken FML can't wait to program this entire thing by myself.
5 -
Java is kind of like teenage sex--everyone is always talking about it, but in reality they don't even know what they're talking about.
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Once I didn't knew anything about coding or development.
Someone suggested me to start with Java.
Still looking for that Mada-foker.5 -
This whole week I’ve been writing Java (for the first time) and I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s a horrible language, written by horrible people, for the purpose of making other people’s lives horrible.
Fuck Java 🙂9 -
in the past 48 hours my partner must have asked me 50 times to create an "AI" that can get the data we need off of wikipedia.
Background: I am in AP Computer Science AB but I have been programming long enough that this class is a joke. We were assigned to partners with the task of creating a search engine that finds informations on wikipedia("which is dumb because thats what the search tool is for") so I created a Java Web-Scraping program in probably 30 minutes and showed my partner. He told me I am completely wrong because it would be "cool" to incorporate machine learning into the assignment.
Do I even tell his what machine learning is or should I just let his figure it out?7 -
"No you can't use Java 11's `var` because other developers will [be boomers about it and unable to check types by hovering over variables for half a second]" - my team, basically22
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ah yes, i'm a VERY kinky Java dev
my favorite NSFW act is naming my java variables shorter than their data types11 -
Back in the late 90's when I got started in my career - had a boss that didn't known the difference between Java and JavaScript. I made the mistake of trying to explain the difference. If you can keep the boss in the dark and get away with it - do it. Ignorance is bliss.1
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>Be me
>About to finish large-ish GUI program in Java
>Finish coding program
>Be happy that you finally finished
>Go to test the program
> Doesn't start
>Get concerned
>Debug the code for hours on end to find out why it isn't working
>Find that you were missing a semi-colon the whole time
>Yell into a pillow
>Go to devRant to rant about it11 -
Java Wicket UI is the worst
Java Wicket UI is the worst
Java Wicket UI is the worst
Java Wicket UI is the worst
Java Wicket UI is the worst
Java Wicket UI is the worst
I typed every line instead of copying & pasting4 -
So I'm tryna register for classes using my college's portal, and I click on "add/drop classes", and an entire Java stack trace gets dumped on my screen, with a warning at the bottom not to expose these errors to production in order not to let potential attackers know about how your backend works. I guess nobody at the college ever read that message.3
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Anybody remember when we actually spent time writing code instead of debugging the tools? Specially the gazillion of crap that's out there for fucking Java shit?11
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New on HS Robotics team (we went to worlds last year —> we’re good). I come from France.
The lead programmer say that we are gonna stop coding the robot in Java and start C++ this year, so naturally I’m excited!
Lead programmer just told us we’re actually staying with Java... fuck.4 -
Saying Java is good because it works on every operating system, is like saying anal sex is good, because it works with every gender!9
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Started doing Java because i thought it had much better libraries than C++ .Now after doing it , still not able to decide whether to stick with Fucking Java or with that Fucking C++ LOL.35
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CIA – Computer Industry Acronyms
CD-ROM: Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
PCMCIA: People Can’t Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
ISDN: It Still Does Nothing
SCSI: System Can’t See It
MIPS: Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed
DOS: Defunct Operating System
WINDOWS: Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
OS/2: Obsolete Soon, Too
PnP: Plug and Pray
APPLE: Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
IBM: I Blame Microsoft
MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers
COBOL: Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
LISP: Lots of Insipid and Stupid Parentheses
MACINTOSH: Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs
AAAAA: American Association Against Acronym Abuse.
WYSIWYMGIYRRLAAGW: What You See Is What You Might Get If You’re Really Really Lucky And All Goes Well.2 -
Wrote my first line of Java since I was 12 or 13. A basic hello world line. I then got the error that reminded me of why I disliked programming in general that time. Fucking semicolon8
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why the hate on java? ok, i'm only studying applied computer sciences for a year now, we mainly saw java /javascript and i like them. personally i worked with python, c, c#, php, swift too but i still don't see the problem with java4
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Am I the only one that doesn't like Java? I mean I don't hate it or say it's bad. It's pretty clear that it has been probably the most influential language after C. I just don't like how typed and verbose it is, also I feel old just using it or something based on it (like Jenkins)13
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coded a java program in eclipse throws back error .
Know that program is correct.
Created a new project file copy pasted the code, wolaa.. executed.
:/5 -
For all the hate that Java gets, this *not rant* is to appreciate the Spring Boot/Cloud & Netty for without them I would not be half as productive as I am at my job.
Just to highlight a few of these life savers:
- Spring security: many features but I will just mention robust authorization out of the box
- Netflix Feign & Hystrix: easy circuit breaking & fallback pattern.
- Spring Data: consistent data access patterns & out of the box functionality regardless of the data source: eg relational & document dbs, redis etc with managed offerings integrations as well. The abstraction here is something to marvel at.
- Spring Boot Actuator: Out of the box health checks that check all integrations: Db, Redis, Mail,Disk, RabbitMQ etc which are crucial for Kubernetes readiness/liveness health checks.
- Spring Cloud Stream: Another abstraction for the messaging layer that decouples application logic from the binder ie could be kafka, rabbitmq etc
- SpringFox Swagger - Fantastic swagger documentation integration that allows always up to date API docs via annotations that can be converted to a swagger.yml if need be.
- Last but not least - Netty: Implementing secure non-blocking network applications is not trivial. This framework has made it easier for us to implement a protocol server on top of UDP using Java & all the support that comes with Spring.
For these & many more am grateful for Java & the big big community of devs that love & support it. -
To all fellow Java devs out there. Remember the Java life: "We code hard in the cubicle"
https://youtu.be/b-Cr0EWwaTk -
The best part is the satisfaction you get when you see the thing you've worked on for a long time being used and making people happy.
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No one loves Java as much as Google and Oracle. They are willing to have a battle in court. Or maybe it is just that $9 billion 😂😂😝
But on a serious note as a former paralegal "I don't think copyright should be applied on a programming language " plus, I feel like even if it is applied... google is using java in it's own way (android) as the courts have stated that you can't copyright a language syntax or API definition. So Google can use the Java langauge syntax and core Java API freely on Android.
I don't know about you but, a lot of clients do bring up their concerns..on what the implications are for them and their company developing mobile apps!!
Any updates? Concerns? Thoughts?4 -
Java Dev: "Does Josh's team own this java service?"
Scrum Master: "They did the dev work but we own it."
Java Dev:
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Hadn't touched Java for more than a year, had to refresh it back. Probably learnxinyminutes is enough?2
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When some colleague ask for help in a project that you're supposed to know everything but you really don't (damn multi threading in Java )4
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I have just learned java language. Can anyone tell me some small projects that will help me as a beginner?10
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Am at a Hackathon and am being judged for coding in Java, and I have been relegated to developing the front end. I feel judged.6
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I feel like more than half of the time i spend coding Java is actually writting system.out.println().
I mean come on ! Who got time for that ?!5 -
I thought I was decent at Java until I saw it in action over an internship this summer... is it always so complicated or do I have more to learn?2
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Why does java have so many nonsensical limitations? Why? Why can't we have multiple heritage? Why can't we have friend classes? Why can't we make static abstract methods? Oracle, PLEASE.9
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Who says Java is platform independent? Here I can't easily move a project to different device on same platform.3
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I'm looking for advice on building a cross-platform java library for embedded devices, where I want the same framework for all devices, but some hardware is incompatible.
Should I make this thing multi-part, where the framework is the "core library" and hardware-specific parts are add-ons?3 -
Screw Java. Spent the last two days in this language and it's driving me to fits. Tried making a generic function. Java can't seem to easily handle generic typed arrays. Java threw a fit when I converted an array function to an integer function. Java has all this stupid boilerplate code that you put on every stupid thing.
Programming in Java is about as pleasurable as running face first into a brick wall.2 -
So, a year ago we started to learn java at school. Since I have started learning java I hated it. I don't know why, but I absolutely don't like java. Do you guys agree? I want to like java, but I have no reasons why, anyone has some tips?7
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“Data structures”... More like “i hate java so much and i am thinking of dropping outta college and live in a cave where i never have to see a monitor ever again.” Am i right?3
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Boss asked me to find out good beginner java course for the new n00b colleagues. Help me out please.7
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I've just tried those streams of Java 8. And I can't understand, how on Earth I didn't try them before. They're magnificent.
Hovewer I have some doubts about using them in production. I think no one else will be able to understand what code with streams do.2 -
I have coded in Java from like two years but just now out of nowhere a thought came to my mind.
Why do we need to use "java SomeClass" to run code of SomeClass and why not "java SomeClass.class" ? What difference does it make? 🤔 -
I tried implementing graph data structure in java. And I reckon it's the most painful code I ever wrote since "hello world".5
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There was a rare footage of aliens using java to fly their ufo, well then i guess thats why android was built on top of java
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What is the use of Java nowadays besides Android? I rarely see Desktop apps written in Java and backends are developed more efficientl with django, node.js ,etc... just think about it setting up spring boot and all the warnings and errors...4
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Is it wrong that I hate Java?
I tried learning it before, couldn't get myself to, I thought there was something wrong with me, maybe im not open to learning new languages
Then I got introduced to F#, Loved it! Even moved portions of pet projects to it
Looked at Java again
Still hate it.
Advice?2 -
Idk why but whenever I seem to code anything in Java, my hands stumble all over my keyboard and I end up back spacing more than writing ActUAL code
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Java is the worst shit ever
This works:
int a = 4;
a *= 4.0;
This doesnt:
int a = 4 * 4.0;
:)))))))))))))
Makes sense10 -
Hi everyone well we quit gg scripting cause we figured out lua can be converted to cpp for memory searches! we all know lua and know how to convert it to cpp but for the gui
How do i learn java?9 -
So yeah I just had Ubuntu show me two errors directly after startup, then claiming that there is a programming error in aptdaemon and then IntelliJ crashing because of a read-only FS.
After rebooting my VM im faced with a BusyBox prompt saying my disk is corrupted. Fuck VMWare. This is not the first time the disk in my VM got corrupted. -
Since I have learned Java I was taught that Java only passes by value. But my Uni Professor discusses that Java is passed by reference for object and string. I am really confused right now and need some advice.15
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Why is Java goto language for most backend systems, distributed and scalable, specially in big organizations like Amazon?12
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Going to a crash course Java event tonight. Not sure how enthusiastic I should be based on some of your rants 🤔2
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The problem with Java errors is you ask for the error of a banana and you get the stack trace of the past 100M years of evolution.4
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Question for java masters, can you please show me the java mastering degrees
Example : Java, Java Gui, Java Jdbc .....
Thank you7 -
People experienced with java/ multi threading , can you tell me how you build a pausing mechanism for threads? Like, if my bg thread is supposed to count for 100 seconds, and i need a mechanism to :
A: start it,
B: stop it on its counting completion/ manually
C: pause its execution at a number on a button click
D: resume its counting from the same number on another button click
How would i do that?
SO Question link here: https://stackoverflow.com/questions...21 -
Which Java GUI shall I learn in 2021? I see people are demonizing swing and telling its obsolete, so it would be really helpfull if someone gives an nice Java stack example for developing windows application focused on PLC and other external controller like arduino, raspberry etc, control and visualisation., in general, automation and industrial monitoring and controls.3
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It seems Java on Linux runs slower than Windows... Same code takes about 2x longer to run. And well this code is for a batch job...
Does anyone have experience with JVM tuning/optimization or can confirm/disprove this is the case?23 -
Hey, I'm new to java. I was just practicing and found that don't know how to use Date to get an input. Any easy way? Searched almost for an hour. Help!1
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public class LearningJava{
public static void main(String[] args){
boolean isprogrammingEasy = true;
if(isprogrammingEasy){
System.out.println("your on the right track!");
}else{
System.err.println("Try again!");
}
}
}
i know i know pls dont get triggered cuz dev rant is not a code editor but im starting to understand java and javascript also found this youtuber im learning off of i think you guys helped and yes i have skidded a few times but i know its okay sometimes not cool to steal someone source code Thanks everyone
youtuber im learning from: https://youtube.com/watch/...
i think i can understand dex. jadx and more i wont post anymore cringe posts before some devs mght get tired of me just development :)2
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