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I tell my parents that I chose Game Development in the GeoLab course(The college which my mother really wanted me to try), and mother's response is: „Gaming is mankind's disaster. Why do you want to make more people miserable?“

Kill. Me. Now.

Comments
  • 28
    Don't listen what your parents want, do what you yourself desire!
    My dad told me as a little kid, that programming is just another flink of mine. Well, since I'm stubborn I wanted to show him that he is wrong. Now 14 years later he is proud of me, for making the decisions that I have made. And I'm sure your parents will be proud too ;)
  • 10
    You know it's better to play games instead of playing life.
  • 15
    @AlexDeLarge probably the media 'hurr durr, killergames are making murderer'
  • 35
    "Gaming is bad, you're wasting your life"... *picks up beer, sinks into the couch, turns on retarded reality show*
  • 5
    @AlexDeLarge why does you ask that, everyone knows, blames for 90% of your failure goes to gaming.
  • 27
    @ThatDude Doesn't help that she's also a really heavily religious person... And tries forcing it down my throat.
  • 4
    @BlueNutterfly follow your passion, that's all you need to remember. Validation from close ones is great (and maybe it is worth having some kind of a talk about it one more time with your mom), but it's by all means not necessary! As long as they don't obstruct your way - just keep doing what you are passionate about. DevRant and other tech-savvy people who (dare I say it?) are not indifferent and want you to succeed will hopefully provide enough encouragement for you...
  • 1
    @demiko can agree. Though in Baltic countries it seemed like less of an issue. For me in Lithuania it seemed like one generation up from my parents (ie grandparent generation) were the most religious ones. Parents generation not so much ^^
  • 4
    Average moms hate videogames then proceed wasting hours on candy crush
  • 23
    That followed by joking about me making a fucking game about microbes(No, thanks), and when I piss her off for some reason, I'M the one out of touch with reality and shit like that.

    And I'M the one being spoiled with everything. Also told how I'm trash if I don't do everything as they want me to, forced to spend nearly nonexistent time near the PC when they are there etc.
  • 3
    @BlueNutterfly It's sad that your parents don't support your decision but it's not a reason to stet second guessing said decision.

    I've met many people who tried to convince me not to choose the path I am on (apprenticeship as software dev, with some sort of higher degree) because it would be too hard, and I wouldn't have time for my therapies...

    I decided to do it anyway and it is working out... I don't have my degree yet but I've gotten a pretty good offer for afterwards already.

    My mom knows all of this and still tells me not to spend that much time in front of my PC...
    But it's the time where I learn the most and I will keep it up.
    And I hope you are going to do that too.

    PS: And in case you need it DevRant will be there for you
  • 20
    @needToRoll Mother's actively working to shut my decision down. Hooray!

    On a serious note, if I could have been employed, I'd have moved away, never to look at them again. They've harmed me more than any other factor in my life.
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly that's harsh... *hugs* mental abuse through patronage is one of worse parenting strategies, if it can be called that.

    This reminds me of my father "as long as you live under my roof you will do what I order, or you can leave and I'll disown you"

    Joy
  • 1
    But but gamification is the new engagement mooooom!!! šŸ˜‚šŸ¤”šŸ¤‘
  • 3
    Hahaha, jokes on you becayse I dont need to bother to wonder what they think if I choosed the game dev lyfe because they have been absolutely dissapointed in me for years! HAhaha....

    we seriously need an edit button in the web version
  • 2
    Either games or drugs for free time, which is better? :p
  • 3
    @gitpush alcohol to numb the pain of life and games for you to pretend to have another life that you are currently having
  • 2
    @legionfrontier that could work
  • 18
    @olezhka Same thing has been said towards me a billion times.
  • 19
    @gitpush Apply cold to the burnt area, parents!

    I don't want an addiction in my life. It will be impossible to let go of it.
  • 4
    @BlueNutterfly loool
    when I told my parents I want to do coding for a living they said: Cool, now we have an IT in the house
    Me: *thug life*
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly dont worry they will be proud once they realize what really are you doing.im thinking you are at university probably they will be proud i know that.
    i started with c when i was 8 now im 17 mom was like that but then she got android and realized what am i really doing. dad on the other hand was proud from beggining cause he got me so young into programming. now they are both proud of me and im happy for that.
    if i can say just wait a year or so and start showing them what creating games can make especially money they will be then proud of you.
  • 2
    @gitpush ohhh i know that feeling.
    can you fi... fuck no
  • 3
    @Haxk20 life is hard všŸ™„
  • 1
    Older people can give invaluable advice on how to handle life situations. They cannot, and should not, however, be trusted about any decision about your future. They had lived a different time, and different situations.

    When they get assertive, simply laugh and hug them with lots of love. I found that to be the best way to deal with them.

    I was lucky. My parents never had any career path laid out for me, and they pretty much supported all of my choices. They were still assertive about not leaving a job after just 2 years.
  • 2
    Stay strong.
    If you can't make her understand what you like about making games by e.g. showing her different kinds of games than the ones usually covered in the media, or games that actually help people or showing her some work you've done, don't. It's a waste of words then.

    Maybe that she's somehow worried about your future and has a really bad way expressing it, but that shouldn't enable her to question your decision in such a harsh way.
    Try to block every discussion about your decision, change subjects or talk as less about the subject as possible as long it feels as hostile to talk about it.
    Maybe she'll come around.

    (My mom actually tried to get me into game development/design although she's in no way a gamer. (And religious, that aside.) She thought of it as a great way to express my creativity while also supporting my interest in tech.
    I wish I could share that support I had/have with you.)
  • 2
    That moment, when you encounter someone from your country on DevRant šŸ˜†šŸ˜†
  • 17
    @Khundzaka Oh, fellow Georgian?

    And well, time will tell.
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly
    Yep, I'm kartvelian šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚. So you are a game developer, aren't you?
  • 2
    Just reassure her that you're not going to write Yet Another MOBA. You'll be fine.
  • 1
    May be you could tell her that we all will be living in one of the games a few years from now?
  • 17
    @Khundzaka Not yet. Trying to...
  • 19
    @xorith As if she even knows what a MOBA is. She thinks I'll be playing games all day if I become a game dev.

    She's also the controlling type. She's seriously going to college to freaking find out whether I could go on with the shit web dev course and asked exactly how long I'm going to be at the university, while also most likely making me get lecturers' phone numbers to see how I'm doing!

    I wonder why I cannot be bothered for the university anymore after six years of this cycle.

    She says that woking to a self-sacrificial level is what defines a human, so by her definition, I'm not even a human.
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly oh shit,this really is fucked up :/
  • 20
    @plusgut I know. I have to find a way out and soon.

    I've been saying that for years already and the fact I haven't is what makes me even more angry about it.

    Well, at least I'm trying now.

    Also, whenever my parents are pissed off, they say, „You play games all day!!!!!!!!!!!!1!1!“, even if I haven't played a SINGLE game for months.

    They just won't quit and if that's the case, I'm going to have to escape one way or another.
  • 3
    @BlueNutterfly good for you for trying. I had to leave my hometown to grow out of a repressive situation myself. But your situations seems to be more complicated and harder.
  • 18
    @plusgut Partially because of me being the type who won't ask people when needed. I feel guilty for it.

    Not to worry. I'll find a way. I have no choice. I have to.

    Feels like the good old me again. I survived years by telling myself I had no other choice than survival.
  • 3
    @BlueNutterfly most things can be done by yourself, there are only a few things you need friends/other people for it.

    Nothing wrong about being selfmade. But if you say you need help from time to time, then there is nothing wrong about that too. Most people like helping others. But sure it's not easy to ask them, there is the fear of rejection...

    P.S. thanks for all the updates.
  • 2
    What my P.S. should have said:
    P.S. thanks for all your ++

    I shouldn't write and talk with my collegue at the same time :p
  • 17
    @wolt Not really...

    That is the root of all this. If I had it, I would run like there's no tomorrow.

    Seems like we agree on a lot, @AlexDeLarge.
  • 18
    Update: Now I have to be telling my mother how many hours I spend at the university and exactly what I'm studying.

    Not a control method at all -_- Even worse is how she, a DOCTOR, is covering that up by saying she's interested in how food is made. If she were interested, she could look it up. She has built a whole fucking garden with zero knowledge of plants before looking them up and here she is asking me like that.

    I hate the fact she's acting exactly the same way as she was when I was 6. 17 years have passed!!! How am I never the person who's allowed to make her own decisions?

    If I could have enough to live and pursue my hobbies, I would be happy. And I don't even need that many friends. Just those I can hang out and have fun times with, support and be supported by in times of need.
  • 17
    @irene I wish you the best.

    I would ask whatever power is making crazy coincidences to happen to let me go through that game dev course and get employed... That is literally the only option I have.
  • 17
    Just for shits and giggles I might try out a certain vacancy...

    Of a female private detective.
  • 16
    @shivayl For more than 15 years she has not understood that I just like computers and am in no way addicted to them.

    I don't think it would ever hit home in any way.

    @irene Investigation, I suppose...
  • 16
    @irene Shall I? Sorry, just having second thoughts about it.
  • 16
    @irene I'm a bit sceptical about it, too, but I've seen enough of the horrible side of mankind to be scared of what others have done. I rarely get emotional about brutal as hell killings/crimes anymore.
  • 1
    Video Games and ESports are going to be one of biggest industry in the world.
    Next year ESports is going to be worth $2 Billion.
    I had a dream, few months back "to be a profesional CS player".
    It's only parents that don't see it. Profesional Gamers are earning more that what many profesionals earn, these days. We are in the same old times, when sports was considered, not worthy. Similar is the case with eSports.
    Good news is, eSports are accepted and includes in "Asian Games", to be played next year, in Qatar, if I am not wrong.
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly I just watched a video and had to think about you, don't let the big ones judge what you should do, or shouldn't. You do you and in the end, they will have to admit that something great came out of it.

    https://youtube.com/watch/...
  • 1
    @plusgut but it will be damn too late
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly same here ... I have lot of interest in computer. During college admission, I wanted to be inti mechanical engineering. Back then I thought, though i have liking for computers, I do t want to make my carrier into it. I failed to get into mechanical. I could have easily get IT. But I had really bad impression of IT.

    During first few days of sophmore year, I realized, I am not a right place. So I skipped college for one complete year. I attended some classes for first semester and skipped 2nd semester completely.
    I was fucked badly back then. 4 backlogs from 1st Sem ( failed exams ). So I had to write 9 exams at the end of 2nd sem. After that, maybe it's the movies or tv shows I watched or stories I read, I started to get more attracted towards programming and my interest for computer was now at totally new level. When I was in school, I was 14 or 15, I wanted to be a hacker.

    After my sophmore, I wanted to dropout from college badly.
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly you are inactive since last 5 days. You family killed you?
  • 19
    @jalebiBhai I'm alive, thanks... Just kinda depressed...
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly been there ...Many times
  • 19
    @ThatDude I won't die, I promise...

    Just another part of my life.
  • 1
    Promise.then(() => {
    //Alive
    }.catch()
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly at it again? Why all the depression šŸ˜ž
  • 20
    @gitpush Well, the whole family attacking me wasn't a good start. I'm also not making progress in anything. Feels like being stuck.
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly shit :/ I'm sure you'll figure it out.
  • 1
    @ThatDude true that, but in reallity it's often not the case. And even often the other way around..
  • 19
    @ThatDude It hurts way too much when it's the family.

    Also, have you tried on-screen keyboard if you're on windows? It would help with typing at least.
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly get more of the "me time" and do what you love. When I go through similar situation I go to places like Starbucks with my laptop and code, at least I got the me time and actually wrote something
  • 2
    @ThatDude for example when I told my dad that I won the hackathon he was like: 'ok, I'm working at home right now, painting the floor.'
    Wtf? Could you please be proud of me and not make me feel guilty that I left home.
  • 18
    @plusgut That is so familiar to me...

    @gitpush We'll see about that.
  • 18
    @ThatDude What the hell happened to it?
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly @ThatDude Yea it is, but it gets better. I don't care as much as I did some years ago. And it has the sideeffect that I'm always aiming higher and reaching these goals.
  • 19
    @ThatDude I knew it. It's always the dropping.

    @plusgut In my case it ends up being an unachievable level of standards.
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly yea.. fuck that. Don't judge yourself by what your family wants, or what society wants. Judge yourself by your own realistic standards custom to you. And even if you don't reach it, the only thing what matters is that you try to be happy. And I believe that you will reach that ;)
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly My last achievement was .....
    wait ...maybe in past life
  • 19
    @jalebiBhai My last achievement is surviving all the things in life.
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly ok. So just don't die. Else I will stop getting ++'s, which I hardly get
  • 21
    @jalebiBhai *Laughs like crazy*
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly If I ever get to 50k, then it would be because of you or that guy who run script to donate ++'s
  • 1
    Happened to me when I once visited a doctor.

    He asked me what are my future plans

    Me: 'I like coding and making games,mostly I will continue it'

    Doc: Why you wasting you wasting your precious time in games ? Games are waste of time,do something productive.

    *biggest facepalm moment*
    Doc who probably spent his whole young age reading books will never understand what games mean to us šŸ˜‚
  • 1
    I dont really see a problem, go with the flow. Get a high paying job at EA or Ubisoft, they are two of the most hated gaming companies. You will make your parents happy by making people miserable and you do what you like./s
    On a more serious note, why do they care what you do as long as you make a good buck and what you like?
  • 19
    @DeusExRant They say they think I'm not getting ahead. If only that were not an excuse for controlling my decisions.
  • 3
    @BlueNutterfly thanks for the ++'s. Challenge accepted šŸ˜Ž
  • 2
    Can you tell us something about you please?
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly Thank you so much for the love!
  • 2
    @BlueNutterfly
    The grass is always greener...
    Throw your mom a bone go to church with her she'll probably be ecstatic. It doesn't matter if you believe..., it's important to your mom. Maby it gives her the idea your soul can be saved ^^

    And btw.
    Game Dev is in service of others. It might not be a operation life/death. But neither is being a chef / biologist / mechanic.
    A game dev can go alot of ways with the acquired skills. You can work in science and create interactive software for them. Create a simulation of Mars got space travel or Creating a simulator for the army that saves lives by training. Or for fun/stress release.

    If you can't do anything right in the eyes of you're parents stop trying. And start living Your life.

    You have one pair of parents, so throw them a bone once in a while.

    Leave the past in the past, tomorrow's not promised, Today's just a gift, I guess that's why it's the present.
  • 12
    @Triskelion I do the „throw the bone“ thing. It's just never enough when they get pissed off...
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly
    I get it, it is hard/frustrating. You probably develop some insecurities/self doubt, I know i did.

    Either your parents want the best for you, and you might be able to talk to them. If so make the case this isn't working, the only thing you guys are doing is ruining our relationship, and adding unnecessary stress. Then explain how it affects you. Hopefully they'll understand and get the message. Otherwise stop caring...

    The other case they want to brag to their friends, my daughter is going to x. This is quite sick so if this is the case fuck m.

    Focus on what you can control, what you do, and how you feel about yourself. Don't focus on what you can't control, nomatter how much you worry about this things they won't change. Where you're born, you're parents politics etc.

    This is a short moment in your life.
  • 3
    @plusgut you said it nice...
  • 12
    @Triskelion It's more towards the second even if they say they want the best for me.

    They made sure that I would not rebel. Come on, it cannot be the case of them actually giving a fuck about me when I got threatened with a prostitution charge for wanting to have spent time overnight with my then boyfriend and some friends who happen to be guys and me having protested against their unwillingness to let me. I was over 18 then. I'm not even the type who cares about anything that has to do with sex.

    Also, one of my sisters is working in London and the other is in Berlin, studying Medical Neurosciences and while those aren't bad achievements, the parents are telling EVERYONE about it and using it to tell me how useless and underachieving I am.

    It's definitely the second case and I fucking hate it.
  • 1
    @BlueNutterfly
    Damn that hurts...

    There isn't anything logical I can say that makes you feel better. Just feel sorry for them, pity them. It's sad that they have to go through life like that.

    Even though i pity you're parents for not seeing you shine. I hate you're parents to, they suck! šŸ˜Ž

    You are good enough.
  • 14
    Hoping I will somehow cope is the best I can.

    So be it.
  • 1
    Yeah .... Run away ....
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