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AboutLady Dev in her Batcave
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LocationVancouver, BC
Joined devRant on 8/20/2018
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My 80 year old very absent minded dad made a website, all by himself, using a two decades old book he got from the thrift store.
He's even hosting it himself on an old laptop running Debian, including a redirect to a beautiful nostalgic /~username/index.htm url (not gonna share the link, because his personal details are on there).
The whole site is incredibly carefully crafted, and I'm super proud of him.
Who cares if it's not a React app? The 14 kilobytes of HTML 4.0 markup load in 20-30ms, and it renders pretty much perfectly in every browser including Internet Explorer 4 and Edge.
🤷♂❤️36 -
Some empty-headed helpdesk girl skipped into our office yesterday afternoon, despite the big scary warning signs glued to the door.
"Hey, when I log in on my phone, the menu is looking weird"
"Uh... look at my beard"
"What"
"Just look at this beard!"
"Uh.... OK"
"Does this look like a perfectly groomed beard"
"Uh... it's pretty nice I guess"
"You don't have to lie"
She looks puzzled: "OK... maybe it could use a little trimming. Uh... a lot of trimming". "I still like it though" she adds, trying hard to be polite.
"I understand you just started working here. But the beard... the beard should make it clear. See the office opposite to this one?"
"Yeah"
"Perfectly groomed ginger beards. It's all stylish shawls and smiles and spinach smoothies. Those people are known as frontend developers, they care about pixels and menus. Now look at my beard. It is dark and wild, it has some gray stress hairs, and if you take a deep breath it smells like dust and cognac mixed with the tears caused by failed deploys. Nothing personal, but I don't give a fuck what a menu looks like on your phone."
She looked around, and noticed the other 2 tired looking guys with unshaven hobo chins. To her credit, she pointed at the woman in the corner: "What about her, she doesn't seem to have a beard"
Yulia, 1.9m long muscled database admin from Ukraine, lets out a heavy sigh. "I do not know you well enough yet to show you where I grow my unkempt graying hairs... . Now get lost divchyna."
Helpdesk girl leaves the scene.
Joanna, machine learning dev, walks in: "I saw a confused blonde lost in the hallway, did you give her the beard speech?"
"Yeah" -- couldn't hold back a giggle -- "haha now she'll come to you"
Joanna: "No I already took care of it"
"How?"
"She started about some stupid menu, so I just told her to smell my cup". Joanna, functional alcoholic, is holding her 4pm Irish coffee. "I think this living up to our stereotype tactic is working, because the girl laughed and nodded like she understood, and ran off to the design department"
Me: "I do miss shaving though"68 -
Want free stickers? Here's a short list:
https://stickers.notifuse.com/
https://stickers.onion.io
https://stickers.digitalocean.com
Will update (in comments) when new ones are found.4 -
Once, at college I asked my computer science teacher that why don't you use Linux 🐧?.
And guess what he said his reply was "I don't use pirated softwares so I'm saving money to buy Linux OS " and after listening this I was really about to die of laughing 😂😂.
Like literally how can someone be such a dumb and especially a computer science teacher.
After this he asked me to get out of the class and I thanked God as it's better to stay out of such a class with such a dumb teacher. 😂😂12 -
woke up at 5am
no alarm clock was required
my fucking passion woke me up to get up and code.
i coded outside in my backyard
felt like cold war
it was night
it was dark
a depressing horror atmosphere
just like my whole life
2 hours later i started seeing sun
it was cold outside. alone. in the dark. my arms were freezing.
but 2 hours later i managed to code the feature. it worked.
3 hours have passed. im ripped. quentally.
doing it here. inside now. started the day happy. dropped bullshit from day before. cleanser of all toxicss.
fuck the past. the past will pull you down and kill you.
this. remember. always do not forget.7