I'd become a gardner:
Different sandbox but still fighting bugs.

I think my web app is more responsive than me...

!rant
About to attend a hackathon with free food and beverages - including alcohol.
And I can't get this xkcd with the ballmer peaking out of my head.
I sincerely hope it won't get as bad as ME...

I just realized that agile and fragile are very close...

I think today I'm gonna work like a stack: Last in, first out.

The reason why I don't trust php:
var_dump(0 == "0deadbeef1");
var_dump(7 == "7deadlysins");
(both return true)

I think it says a lot about IT that there's a nice polite (enter) key but the (exit) key is named (escape).

Every time I go to get some coffee I end up brewing a new pot because I got the last sip...
Every fucking time!
Maybe I should consider playing the lottery...

I've been investigating an android app that should handle gcm messages but somehow didn't do it after the app closed.
Used android studio to start debugging the app setup of gcm worked, closed the app - message was not processed by app.
Tried it again and started the app from phone closed it. Now the message gets processed.
Tried this for four days with workarounds, intensive researches even opened a ticket with Google for this but no luck.
... effin gcm ...
Today I eventually realized that when I started the app from android studio for debugging and closed the app then gcm apparently breaks and cannot handle messages anymore...

So I essentially wasted 4 days debugging a bug that only occurred because I debugged the app... *argh*

YOU TUNAHEAD 'ROID STUDIO!

Currently developing an android app that is a clone for an existing iOS app. Sadly all the PMs and POs (the P-M/O fraction) at this firm are somehow iPhone users.
So every time we implement stuff according to android guidelines some PMO comes around and asks: "why doesn't this look/work/smell like in iOS?"
Somedays I feel like crying...

Programmer seems like an insufficient job title: translator for high-level languages with focus on user meditation seems more like it.

When your stand-up desk is 2cm too short for you to comfortably work on it...

You're bugging me. I'd like to open an issue and fix -you- this. If you need help debugging feel free to ask, reflection might help.

Re: Exceptions
I'll make one for you if you can handle it.

"I'm just gonna put a button over there."
"... but this shouldn't become a social media platform!"

These rare moments when you realize:
"it's not a bug - IT IS a feature!" o_O

Finally figured out what FML stands for - apparently it's not "Fix my lighthouse" as urban dictionary suggests... ^^

It's not a bug, it's a framework!

"What would we be without our technology?"
"Short of an excuse for our incompetence."

My favourite math operator? Distraction!

xkcd-diction: Expecting behind every image a funny alt-text...

Error Driven Development™
Join the hype and fail with a process - for science!

Writing code to put me to sleep.
try{
me.sleep();
} catch (InterruptedException e) {
throw Pillow.atInterruption(e);
}

If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0

Fucking android...
Spent my whole day trying to tint (i.e. alter the image color) some svg with a PictureDrawable in an ImageView.
Went android underground, thought it had something to do with LAYER_TYPE_SOFTWARE (since this was required to render the underlying svg), tried my way through ColorFilters and ColorStateLists...
8 hours later I discovered that apparently YOU CANNOT TINT a PICTUREDRAWABLE - this only works with BitmapDrawable. *argh*
And not a word of mention in the fucking documentation *tit*

Just realized that my best rants are inline comments on github...

It's a matter of live and dev.

We don't have ASAP - we're working with Excel.