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Rob :Truth or Dare
Android Dev:Dare
Rob: Uninstall and reinstall your android studio with SDKs @50kbps
Android Dev:Truth2 -
"Aah, time to make a new Android app"
*starts Android Studio*
AS: "Yo yo yo, before you proceed, update all these 512 things in your SDK"
*creates a new Activity*
AS: "Nuh uh, this shit won't work without this, install it"
*runs app on emulator*
AS: "Hoooold your horses, you need to install this, and this, and update this and this.. oh and also that"
*emulator finally runs, app crashes*
AS: "Ohh, ha ha, oopsies, your Gradle config is also screwed up, change every dependency to the newest version and then update them all"
*config finally done, runs again*
AS: "Umm, I am too lazy to sync it myself, so you must press the nice big button on top to sync it"
"Fuck this"
*closes Android Studio*
AS: "WAAAIT WAIT, before you go, a new Android update just showed up, you must upd..."
*alt+f4*5 -
Problems with Android development
1. Android Studio is shitte
2. Android API is shitte
3. Gradle is shitte
4. Emulator is shitte
5. My life is shitte21 -
!Rant Read this somewhere on the internet.
Machine learning is like teenage sex: everyone talks about it, nobody really knows how to do it, everyone thinks everyone else is doing it, so everyone claims they are doing it...4 -
Android Relative layout is similar to Microsoft Word.
Move the button a little bit and earth moves from it's orbit :/8 -
!rant
Last night my girlfriend was extremely happy to make her first Android hello world application.4 -
The newest Android version is used by 1.1% of users... and they are already releasing a newer version.
Will Google ever find a way to fix this? It's fucking pathetic.
29 -
Android development is such an enormous realm. It's simply incredible.
Even after more than 2 years of programming android apps, I can experience a different exception every day!8 -
Wow?!? Even removing this crap takes fucking centuries!
I'm already sitting here for 45 minutes. How the fuck is this possible?!!
25 -
Me: Yes! I'm finally ready to upload my first Android app to PlayStore, im so excited!!
Google: Make sure to remove all the Log calls from your code.
Me: *Finds out that there's no way Android studio can make it for you*
FUUUUUUUU**10 -
*INCOMING CALL FROM MY NETWORK PROVIDER*
HI,
I'm calling from *my network provider* and I wanted to check if you would like to port to our network.
This happened 3 times in a day already. And now 4th time.
Me : Look man, I'm already on the same network and I don't need to port.
Guy : You should have told this to me in the beginning. You wasted my time in not doing that.
THIS CUM DRINKING PIECE OF SHIT PUNKASS BITCH MOTHERFUCKER COULDN'T DO A SIMPLE SEARCH ON HIS COMPUTER BEFORE GIVING ME A CALL AND THEN TELLS ME I WASTED HIS TIME.5 -
Le Me: well it is the time to go back on that Android project and resume the work.
*Open Android Studio, open the project.
*Wait 10 minutes for build/index
*error: gradle outdated, that is ok, update it.
*error: some library needs update
*error: R not found
*error: internal IDE error.
*Clean Project: PC hangs, Fan go so fast..
Shit ! I even not touched the code !8 -
As an Android developer i keep on looking at every single app as if am going to write it again as code3
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Android 9 moved my clock from the upper right corner to the upper left corner and it makes me uncomfortable11
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So...is Android O really being called Oatmeal Cookie?
That's two sub par "dessert" in a row.
Step up your game Google!
That being said it should be a great update to the OS. 😀28 -
I asked a junior dev to convert y axis value to dollars and render the same on a chart. This is what he does.
11 -
I wanted an Android phone with latest Oreo version, atleast 4gb RAM, 32gb or more with good processor supporting 4G dual SIM with a resolution of 1440 pixels by 2560 pixels at US$ 100.
Well got for all of it for US$125.
I went to LineageOS site, exported and filtered all supported devices with my relevant device attributes.
Got LeEco LeMax 2 for US125$ on eBay. Installed latest LineageOS 15.1 with Android 8.1.0. got 25gb free space.
Using the phone for last 10 days, flawlessly.
26 -
Kids upset about their phones not getting android N. Back in our days we where upset about losing our crayons.1
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Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio Fuck Android Studio.... Fuck this shit hole to the end of time9
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If my UI is bad, the app is shit.
If my functionalities are bad, the app is shit.
Being an android developer requires you to be a fill stack developer by default.8 -
I'm working on a project that integrates your Android phone with your PC. Stuff like file transfer, sending SMS and notification sync. I just had an idea for an awesome feature. Started researching and found that the Android API exposes exactly what I need. Full of motivation I started coding until I realized that the permission I need cannot be granted to third-party apps. Happened the second time. Fml1
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I was recently interviewing a fresh college graduate. According to his resume, he had practically invented machine learning. He eats kaggle datasets for breakfast and was all set to invent a cure for cancer with deep learning. And then, I ask him a simple question. What is 's' in 'https' and he says... "simple".3
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$Me: I want to start creating my own android app.
$Me: Let's start by installing android studio
*Goes to download AS*
$AS: That'll be 4gb of your disk space
$Me: well nevermind then
Really? 4gb for a fcking IDE and some build tools?5 -
Android development:
- read the official documentation
- implement the logic in your app using what you learned
- find out that at least one method is always deprecated
- read the updated API and, as always, check out your loyal friend Stack Overflow.2 -
Bought a new android phone and spent an hour:
* uninstalling apps
* disabling automatic updates
* disabling recommendations
* disabling sending anonymous usage data
* disabling notifications
It's like playing hide and seek but without fun4 -
Its time fooooooooooor:
Good spend 8 hours of thinking where the fuck did it go wrong while compiling Android.
Idk but i always say to myself that maybe this time it will be different.
Im always wrong.
But maybe it will be different this time.
I hope for no Error and just clean build.
Ahhhh lets do it. Cant let users wait any longer.
And yes this is one of those Haxk20 Android angry rants.5 -
Exhibit B of Google's inability to code:
One of the most starred Android repositories on Github adds rounded corners to ImageView. That's it.
Sometimes you really wonder what Google's engineers are doing :P
3 -
It really annoys me when someone opens an app in Android phones and then leave it open in the background.10
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There is an error in almost every file, and yet this seems to work
On other days there is not even a single error and still it cracks.
Android Studio, you need to watch your drinking habits -_-
8 -
Just got myself an iPhone se. Was proud android fan for 4 years.
No hate, but android apps really feel like cheap knock-offs.
I'm never coming back.24 -
Seems like everything on android is a "hack" or temporary solution, thanks to google .
Now how the fuck should i create a custom SMS inbox when:
1) i can't run the SMS broadcast reciever in a background service(because background services are deprecated )
2)message SMS reciever in a foreground service ,because this service is not fucking foreground! when the app is cleared from the recents , it shows the service as running, but on recieving the next message , the service dies??wtf?? i think its something related to processes
the app needs to detect a message instantly because some messages are needed to be sent to server the moment they are recieved :/6 -
Last week's Android development time breakdown:
21.9% Managing state
17.7% Referring to lifecycle diagrams
15.1% Waiting for Gradle
8.5% Reading the official docs on how to use component x
8.4% Reordering auto-generated ConstraintLayout XML
7.5% Swearing
4.2% Googling “Stack overflow component x is deprecated”
3.9% Googling “Stack overflow implement component x on API 24 or lower”
3.7% Googling “Stack overflow implement component x on API 21 or lower”
3.2% Googling “Stack overflow implement component x on API 19 or lower”
2.9% Googling “Stack overflow callback y called twice”, realising its a feature and not a bug, swearing a lot
2.0% Checking if Flutter is mature yet
1.0% Implementing business logic4 -
Does anyone else think Android development is kind of dead?
I mean there is a great article for this (https://medium.com/@steve.yegge/...) but basically, React Native and its' tons of "flavors" have beaten native Android Development so badly, Android isn't anything special anymore - nobody wants to touch Mobile Java in 2018.
Google's response? Make another framework to compete with itself. This is why I said I wasn't joking when I "quit" android dev.16 -
Zebra tc51 with a price tag of 1299.99usd. No power supply, no cable, 720p screen, snapdragon 650 soc. This is the RED camera in android 🤦♂️
12 -
Two months of meaningless meetings and calls to assess "requirements" and three months worth of actual development work crammed into 3 weeks. Fuck this corporate bs. Agile my ass.
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Deleting 3 of the 4 Android sdk folders. Why not update one instead. Getting another 90GB of space back which is good for me.
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Jake Wharton
https://github.com/JakeWharton
https://twitter.com/JakeWharton
Used to not work for Google /Android, but since the entire Android community uses about everything he makes, and then everything he touches turns into gold and becomes part of the Android SDK sooner or later, because his work is so useful and good. He now works for Google / Android. He's one of the Android gods, a true rockstar dev!2 -
No way. I hope this is a joke...else its not helping building up trust in their competence (Australian vpn provider)
2 -
aaaaaghh fucking Handlers man. Android is so fucking full of shit, i wonder why am i still doing it. love is pain.
Why can't there be one mother fucking solution to all lazy ass asynchronous programming? handlers, threadpools, asynctask, executers, Broadcasts, intentService, coroutines, rxjava,.... i don't what new stuff are people snorting these days.
Ok , leave everything. A handler is class- no sorry, Handler, alongside some fucking Looper clss (and maybe some more stuff i don't know) other classes is a way of handling inter thread communication. Handlers can:
-send data to ui thread
-recieve data from ui thread
-send "messages" to ui thread
-recieve "messages" from ui thread.
- can be attached to ui thread
- can be attached to any child thread
- can be accessed anonymosly via any view
- can be present in multiple places, working together
- can kill night king with a dagger
- can do porn better than johnny sins
- can run for president of the whole fucking world
- do some more shits that i have yet to discover
And where do i find this? buried deep insides some medium articles or in some guy's horrible accent video.
Is background processing really this much of a toughnut to crack?
earlier i was all about using asynctask or foreground/background services, because these are the most easy to understand abstraction of a fairly difficult topic.
But as i see more projects, i see underlying apis like handlers, threadpools , executers , being directly used.
Why cant there be a fucking single abstraction, that could be "lightly tweaked" to handle every ugly case.6 -
Thought the day would never come but... I'm starting to hate android as an operating system...
It's just becoming so inconsistent and fragmented, it's almost at windows level of inconsistent.
Now either google should start regulating the app store and android itself or completely ditch android as a complete stand alone OS.
I would personally seperate android into a runtime and focus on fuschia by building the android runtime into it, that way it could pull system UI element design and such rather than have the user build apps that look completely out of place and don't follow rules like dark mode, theming and the such...
I'm not going to jump ship into iOS because fuck iOS but just really hope google really starting tightening android up else I feel like it's just going to starting breaking more and more into a steaming mess.5 -
This android app is almost done, little bits remaining but I'm so flipping bored of it that I just don't feel like working on it for another minute. I just want to do the other app. But I must complete this one before going to the next. Must.3
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FUCK THE NS (Dutch train company)!
Because of this storm were having, all trains in the entire country are cancelled. So now I'm stranded in some LITTLE SHITHOLE STATION and I already have been waiting for more than an hour. They expect that trains will start up again IN 2 HOURS!
So now I will probably miss the assessment for my programming test for my study.
FUCK ME!!!11 -
You can now group projects in Android Studio and even add icon to them.
Right Click on Project -> New Project Group
Right Click on the Project -> Move to Group
3 -
I belive that except stock android, every other custom android UI sucks.
Especially Samsung UI and MIUI
Who else shares my opinion?7 -
Anyone know the reason why Google removed the Android SDK from the Android Studio Installer? It's making me work harder in setting it up :/5
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Compass readings on Android phone might get messed up when iPhone gets close to it.
I have azimuth showing in my app, we wanted to check if it's working and we put an Android phone on the table and iPhone with compass app running. Android showed 20 degrees less. Colleague picked up iPhone and azimuth on Android changed by 20 degrees :D2 -
Last night I looked at an Android app.
Going to put it bluntly, I don't like java much.
But Android takes it to a whole new level.
I was talking to our (SlimRoms) framework dev about how the database transactions used to take 400ms, and it was cut down to 10ms by, changing to xml with some kind of a reflector (so xml would be saved in the background).
This is atrocious. As a web developer, I live in a world where you can do thousands of transactions in that time (albeit on faster hardware).
So how is it that all of the abstractions in Android add up to a single read/insertion in Android (and I'm talking about an app written by Google) takes 400ms?
Every time I go in that channel to talk to them, I find something screwed up. Gah.4 -
Developing on Android and came across an issue that only seemed to be happening on one of our devices.
A fair bit of time was spent trying to figure out why the hell one resource (image) wasn't available even though it was clearly there in the project and was working on all other devices.
Turns out the image in question was in the drawable-v24 folder on accident so of course wasn't working on the one device running Android version 21 🤦 at least it was an easy fix -
Part rant, part a question. Im working with a colleague on an android app. The guy uses a library for everything that he cant solve on the first try. Need rounded corners? Get a random library from github. Settle a dispute. Am i wrong for trying to avoid using libraries unless i have to or is he?3
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Spent 10 minutes investigating why I can't hit a certain breakpoint. Find out I put it on a comment by mistake.
Fuck Android Studio 😡9 -
Added an If/Else to the start of my Android app to ask for feedback. After writing the else I removed unneeded spacing. Then I ran the app... none of the action listeners worked. Turns out I accidentally deleted the closing bracket for else and when I said yes to feedback it never executes the reset of onCreate lol. Took a while to track down that mistake.
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Working on my first Android app. 🤔🤷🏾♂️
I've heard mixed reviews about building Android apps. I've used Xcode to build apps before, I'm sure it's the same lol 😂20 -
What are some good android developer communities? Looking for somewhere to learn and ask questions that might not be code related, so can't be on stack overflow. What do you use? I use android for hobby projects only.5
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FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP OVERUSING STYLES.XML IN ANDROID.
It is NOT A GOOD IDEA to create a new style for each and every layout and then RANDOMLY reuse those styles in RANDOM places.
Grep is working around the clock to solve this fucking hot mess you've made.
FFS1 -
I was working on an android project this morning.I started android studio.
I went and made a cup of coffee and had it,came back still gradle was building -
You know you need a new pc when android studio freezes after you app crashes when trying to print out the exception but Crashlytics is faster by sending you an email.
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Android stu. make you feel you're not up to date anymore with all the frequent download component.
4 -
when u code on Android Studio, u wish all your error will be solve by enter alt+enter.. its a wonderful world1
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I really miss the android Gingerbread of my Samsung galaxy Y phone.
I still wish to have a plain and simple device for myself. -
Hard day because flashing of my android failed yesterday night and haven't time the whole day to fix it but it was a very productive day at the office ;)3
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Figured out a heisenbug in the app that my coworker (a rockstar 10X dev who I look upto to) couldn't pinpoint at. And then we both sat together and fixed it :)
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Everytime I go back to native Android, I end up: -Wasting a lot of hours with gradle and the shitty dependency system.
-Doing a couple of cours of actual coding and finishing what I needed to do.
-Swearing to never come back5 -
dear Android devs, how many of you work in a Team of more Android devs? And are you more productive in a Team than being solo ?12
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When you are a beginner Android Developer and you are trying to translate one sentence in a Medium article on Android Development 😑
1 -
Hello fellow Devs,
I have developed a small Android library for handling HTTP POST and GET requests. Anyone who is looking for an easy way to perform HTTP calls, can use this library. It supports post requests with JSON and Multipart Form data, file uploading and Get request with URL parameters.
Hope it will help you guys.
https://github.com/shubhadeepb14/...8 -
Just enrolled my Nexus 5x in the Android O beta.
I am very impressed so far with the differences between N and O
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FUCK YOUUUU media creation tool! Should have created a bootable stick, but NO, it does not just throw an error and leave my stick without any partition anymore, it even JUST THROWS AWAY the downloaded file...couln't have saved it as iso, no?!
Jeez, after taking over an hour for downloading5 -
I don't have an ios device (and hope I'll never have to :p) but I hear people saying that apps never crash on it.
Is this true? And if so, how is this achieved:
Forcing devs to pay extra attention to this or some system mechanics/structure or...?
Although i think i already saw things crashing somewhere...4 -
How do you background work in Android? Easy, just use one of the following (which may or may not work as expected depending on what version of Android it's running on, or how long it happens to run for, or what's in the background or foreground, or what triggers it, or what wind the direction is blowing in, or how long since you last gave a fuck)
background Service, or foreground Service, or IntentService, or AlarmManager, or JobScheduler, or WorkManager, or FUCK YOU ANDROID -
Definitely Android 8.0 is neat.
And it's faster.
I think Android has developed a lot.
Isn't that right?1 -
Google decided to deprecate the ProgressDialog class in Android O (26). Now I have to deal with all those deprecation messages in Android Studio!
From the docs: "ProgressDialog is a modal dialog, which prevents the user from interacting with the app. Instead of using this class, you should use a progress indicator like ProgressBar, which can be embedded in your app's UI. Alternatively, you can use a notification to inform the user of the task's progress."
They also bugged the Toolbar! Nice.3 -
What are the languages that can be used to develop an Android application? and also which is the easiest one apart from java?8
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I want to try some Android Development. I already have basic understanding of both C# and Java. C# even a little bit more. But the language is not the problem.
I just can not decide wether I should use Xamarin or do native development using Android Studio.
What would you suggest me, guys? :-)7 -
What is wrong with Android Studio it used to be better just the sheer number of updates and the gradle build oh the gradle build5
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Question for you guys.
I have an Android app in which you can track when and how much you have worked, etc., especially aimed at (food) delivery drivers. I know those kind of apps already exist, it's a hobby project :). But I have no idea what to call it.
Any suggestions?3 -
!rant, but funny
tl;dr I made something that was to protect me in case the customer doesn't pay, wanted to check if it's still there, messed up a little :D
>do an Android app project for almost 6 months
>issues with payment for it
> =.=
>firebase
>"Add new application"
>Remote Config
>add single integer variable
>back to app code
>if (integerFromFirebase != 0) navigateTo(new Fragment())
>mwahahahaha
>but they ended up paying me in the end
>huh...
>see another post on how to secure yourself if customer doesn't want to pay
>well, consider yours as more sophisticated
>hmm... wonder if they removed it
>firebaseconsole.exe
>change "enableJavaScript" (needed a legit name, so it can't be easily backtracked) to 1
>publish changes
>app still works fine
>mhhh... they removed it? really?
>can't fking believe it
>apkpure.com
>search for the app
>download apk
>unzip
>decompile dex file
>find the fragment
>can't find the code that navigates to blank fragment, but the config fetch is still there
>wtf
>look at the app
>restart it
>SHIT ITS NOT WORKING NOW XDDDDD
>changed the variable back to 0
>found out that the lambda in which I navigate to the blank fragment is in other .java file. New thing learned :v
>idk if I'm in trouble but I highly doubt it (console shows max 10 active users atm)
Was fun tho :v3 -
Hi, I need some advice about android app development. I am a front end web developer and I want to get into android development. I have created a simple restaurant app using phonegap and knockoutjs but I didn't like the performance. Can you recommend how should I get into android development? Nativescript and ionic also lack performance as far as I have researched. Any help is appreciated.11
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How hard is it to build an Android app? It's going to have features such as logging in, register, feed, account pages, posting, and private messaging. I'm guessing it'll be tedious but building a simple app is that easy? I don't even know how to make it go to another page from the home page.6
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Hello my fellow Android nerds! Spent the last few hours coming up with this...
Surely there is a better/easier way?
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I cannot find an open source basic note taking app for Android. I don't want syncing to other devices, etc. Any suggestions? Otherwise I'm just going to start writing my own...4
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Bloody fucking Android! Updates, updates and more updates! My development Nexus 5X won't allow me to sideload apps since it updated... Hello, printf debugging! Goodbye, profiler and debugger!
My hate for Android grows with each version after 4.0.$something... 2 was shit, I missed 3, 4 was OK, and since then it's going steeply down.
And don't get me started on Material Design...! Good luck figuring out what's a button and what's a label...
And what's up with the "let's keep all apps running all the time to save a few ms on start" philosophy!? Who thought that is a good idea!? Yeah, System.exit(0) works, but... Is it so hard to determine when it's not needed anymore (has no services running etc.)? Why should a web browser (for example) stay in memory after I quit? Minimize is a thing (Home button), why make it so confusing?
Another thing - feedback-less async tasks - why? I like to know when it is working in the background... How the hell am I supposed to find out if it is supposed to do this or if it is frozen?
And Android deciding to kill your process whenever it pleases without any callback... Happened to me once with an Activity in the foreground (no exceptions anywhere in my app, it just quit). How do you do IO properly? It seems you can't guarantee some file or socket or something that must be closed doesn't stay open (requiring to restart Bluetooth 'cause the socket wasn't closed, for example)...5 -
I really want to get into Android Dev but everytime I start I always get to making a hello world app, and then just go AFK for like 3-4 months and then make another hello world app. Anyone know a reliable way to learn Android Dev?3
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Should I be bothered if I have added 200 lines of badly written code to my Android project (which had readable, organized code before) to make it almost unreadable? BTW the app's memory usage is still low like before.3
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Dammit, why can't the Android SDK use enums!? Figuring out which int constant in which class/interface is relevant to which parameter can be a major PITA...
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Anyone using a newish Android One phone right now who'd care to comment on the experience?
How are the updates? Stock Android work well?10 -
Has anyone heard of anbox? It's something that they say could run android apps on Ubuntu. Is it worth using? Or am I better off with an android vm? If vm which android version do you people recommend?2
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Any suggestion for an alternative android device emulator, to the Android Studio one?
I've got an AMD cpu, that make the AVD run very slow 😞9 -
Guys I am looking to get my "feet wet" in Android Apps. Can you maybe drop a comment on any suggestions... Like IDE to use or any advise you have thnx.8
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Including critical build dependencies inside Android Studio.app instead of in a public repo... why?
2 -
!android_code
Hey I am getting plb in tabbed activity application in android..
Let me know how to code separately for each and every tab within same activity?? -
what is wrong with android storage access hierarchy?All i want to do is to make a file explorer app which could show user a list of all the files on their device and memory card(if available), but its been days and i cannot find a proper way for that.
I checked all the Environment class methods and context.getFileDir()/other methods of ContextCompat , but they either point to emulated storage or the app's folder, but not the sd card. I have scratched my head and pulled all my hairs out researching a lot deep into this area, but found nothing. The only thing that works sometime is the hardcoded paths( eg new File("/sdcard") ) , but that looks like a terrible hack and i know its not good.
I have also read briefly about Storage Access Framework, but i don't think that's what I want. From what i know, SAF works in the following manner : user opens my app>>clicks on a button>>my app fires an intent to SAF>> SAF opens its own UI>>user selects 1 or multiple file>> and my app recieves those file uris. THAT'S A FILE PICKER, AND I DON'T WANT THAT.
I want the user to see a list of his files in my app only. Because if not, then what's the point of my app with the title "File explorer"?7 -
I told them I can do everything from front end, back end, to iOS and mac app, just not Android. I don't like Android. Now they are assigning Android tasks to me, I am working like shit and very unhappy.
Am I not professional or is this ok?2 -
Is it me or Android Studio is really slow with last updates? I mean from last 2 or 3 months it takes a lot to do anything1
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Guys I wanna do android dev. Don't wanna make it my mainstream but need it for some projects. So which is an easy way to develop mobile apps? I dont wanna do android studio. Maybe a JS framework.4
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will ever firebase replace java in android dev? I'm a web dev wanted to hear about it from android guys4
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No matter what brands nor expensive your Android Phone, it still sucks if it has no Pure Android OS in it
-
Hey everyone, what do you use for Android development, Android Studio or cry till you are over it?1
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What's the best way to learn how to develop android code as I would like to but have no idea where to start?1
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Android FragmentStatePagerAdapter has an overridable method "getPageTitle" this would be great if the adapter had app context or returned an @StringRes int! Don't half bake in stuff!
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What's a good inexpensive android phone for development. Something 14 year olds could use without breaking6
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Fucking android...
Spent my whole day trying to tint (i.e. alter the image color) some svg with a PictureDrawable in an ImageView.
Went android underground, thought it had something to do with LAYER_TYPE_SOFTWARE (since this was required to render the underlying svg), tried my way through ColorFilters and ColorStateLists...
8 hours later I discovered that apparently YOU CANNOT TINT a PICTUREDRAWABLE - this only works with BitmapDrawable. *argh*
And not a word of mention in the fucking documentation *tit*1
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