Anyone got any ideas on dealing with crippling depression, loneliness, a potential breakup, and managing a startup alomg side it?

About 1.5 years ago, I had a breakdown and attempted suicide. I was admitted to the hospital. My whole life feel apart. My gf left me while I was in the hospital. I lost my house, dog, car, and business.

My advice is don't! It sounds like too much.

Should ve also added the part where i m on a train rn 1000kn from home, going to a big ass event to represent my startup lol

@Koutsie who do i talk to? I ve lost all my close and good friends, i dont want to worry my family, there is no one else. Too poor for any therapy thing. Tried an online therapy they told me i was too depressed for that. Was clinically depressed for 7 years, since the age of 13, then my gf came and all was okay until a few months back when i started going down this rabbit hole again @Nanos i dont have the courage, the feeling of being completely alone is what takes that away.
@inkt dont have the courage for that either. I do hurt myself sometimes to lessen the pain or take some kind of anti depressants... i m just trying my best to hold on and keep myself together while i can clearly see it all breaking away....

Had something similar (but except a startup, i had to manage a big-ish company), just... trying to kill yourself weekly and taking meds with alcohol doesnt help, do something else.

@BindView are you suggesting i get high? xD

...honestly tho, maybe, is it legal there?

At the risk of starting a mini war.. you could try Jesus. I know it might sound strange but I find it comforting believing this all has a point/goal.

@BindView nope. But i know a few people who could hook me up xD

@Nanos its not the startup that s draining me out. I ve had 7 failed attempts before. This one is better than all. Managed to raise seed investment and some good partnerships etc focusing on scaling and expanding... startup is progressing, it's my personal life fucking me over...

@Nanos it does happen to me. I m ashamed to admit but i have planned on how to go out and for good, pracefully. But there s just one tiny small part of me that believes there s still some hope or it may get better likr it did the last time.....

@Nanos i doubt i d get anything loke that. Mental health is not taken seriously at all in my society. Like it's waayy too much worse than most parts of the world. And any therapy, its gonna cost me in the thousands at the very least

@Nanos artifical company? You mean like... AI sorta thing? e.e

Having friends like these, sitting thousands of miles away, is how i used to manage myself before.
And yeah, you re right. I ve learned that too... That we have limits. The hard way.....

@jamesharrington well not Jesus exactly, but trying my own religion. That helps...

@Koutsie dont you think that d be like a burden. I mean me being one for you or something

Inject 12 marijuanas

Talk to someone - perhaps your gp/doctor?

exercise more, eat healthy.
If your body feels good your mind will too.

Read uplifting scriptures in the Bible......Jesus heals and knows all our troubles.Mathew 6.6

Get a dog

Hey fella, feel free to get in touch, I use Wickr Me (same username as here). Depression is a very complex beast. You have to make a binding agreement with yourself that you're going to be content with yourself. The sad truth is there isn't a checklist of things to do then you'll be ok. I haven't gone through depression myself but I know quite a few Devs and testers that have and I'm still in touch with them. By instinct, you know that clutching to barbed wire is going to hurt a lot and even if you manage to get through, the scars will always be there. Don't pin your hopes on entities you can't control, you will most likely be disappointed as I have been many times.

Thanks for all yoir support guys! Really apprecuate it. I ve been listening to some very heavy metal music. It helps drown out my mind but with passing days it s more like heavy is not heavy enough....

Also the probable breakup? Yeah it just happened. 2 hrs ago. Not sure what i should be feeling right now. I m mad, depressed, sad, idk what... i just feel like laughing out maniacally....

@Nanos thanks man.. i guess... 5 year long relationship just came to an end and not because either of us did anything. No. Its the fucking conservative society.

@Nanos in my society, the culture of arranged marriage system is prevalent. Her parents set her up with someone else amd even though she was supposed to have a say in it, she doesn't. And since the whole family is involved, they ve put wayy too much pressure on her and she cant do anything...

@Xaldos third world country my friend. We got our own shit going on...

@Xaldos its a tradition. Been going on for a couple centuries. Still goes on. People think its okay and all. Its shit. Its complete and utter bullshit.

@Xaldos its the whole of south asia mate... breaking dreams n shit

@Nanos some are good. Some are plain and utter bullshit.

@Xaldos yep. Becausw that s how its been passed down. Though the new generations will brimg a change when we guys are old enough n all...

@Xaldos @Nanos fellas. Traditions suck. Gay marriage. Not a tradition. Walking on burning coal/fire, tradition. Rape for rape, tradition. They suck. Successful marriages arent caused by traditions, they re because of understanding and commitment. My depresseion is the key focal point... not traditions lmao xD

@Nanos men would agree obviously... women are the ones usually forced in to this

@Xaldos i m with you on this...

@Nanos yeah sure they do. But thats not why my gf is getting married. Not because i m job less. But because the other guy is related to her sister s husband. And going by your tradition logic, tell me, she d be happy marrying someone right after the break up? Would you do that to your daughter? Or will you marry someone completely hung over someons else? Traditions are things people did when there was no electricity, they worshipped the sun, thought the earth was flat, polio was still killimg people, plague was there. And so on. Traditions suck. Most of them. They 've been passed down from age of ignorance and a majority of people carry it on. Slavery was a tradition, a major part of society. You re justifying patriarchy by saying this tradition is okay.....

@Xaldos we re just animals who studied engineering and medicine

@Xaldos my family s all chill and everything. They broke free from the traditions because my parents' were a victim of it. Its her family and she wont do it in a million years

@Xaldos because family values and the traditions and the conservative part...

@Xaldos sorta yeah. The reason why its over. She can't so no at this point...

@Xaldos no no, its okay. That s why i rant. Sociology and philosophy xD