Story time!

My exboyfriend used to code in php 5. It’s his favourite programming language, and I hardly teached him how to code in Python.

One day, I said to him: Hey schatz, let’s go to the sex shop ...
He: Oh yeah 😏
Me: ... and buy an elephant thong 😁
He: What?!
Me: Yes, a blue elephant thong for Php

Me laughed

Me: So?
He: No way!
Me: Please!!!!!
He: Ok. I’m working at a cultural events web page. When I got my first client, we’ll go to the sex shop and buy the “php thong”.

Well... I broke up with him before we could go to the sex shop 💔😂😭( for another reasons, not for the php thong, obviously)

Do you have any funny story like this?

I cracked up imagining some guy actually wearing that thong 😂

are you sure it was not about the php thong ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

@Root I'm imagining a whole line of these.... The python for the more well endowed

C, it's just some wool and a 250 page manual on how to knit it yourself

Unix shell is a chastity belt cause you don't have permission

The perl one seems to have 3 leg holes and two of them are tied together but it still fits

The Haskell one is fifteen sizes too large with a hundred different threads

Out of context this thing looks like something a pedo would wear

@chaoticdenim What?! Why?! D:
Well, he was two years older than me, and looked like beign 10 years older more than me, does that count?

@rutee07 Wtf with number 1 :v what was your thesis about?

@rutee07 You seem to have an... Interesting... Sex live.

The only - very unnerdy - thing I shared with my ex...

Well.. I suffer from amyosthenia in the left side of my shoulder and - as a consequence - of impingement syndrom. Translates to ... Pain. (You'll get the good stuff... Type of Pain.)

When I was to busy programming for work he had a pretty easy method for disabling my brain and getting me to bed... Massage. I should mention he was a very sporty and muscular guy... Guess most people would die during the message and amnesty international would call it torture... But it worked fine for me. Relaxing the sore muscles lead to endorphins (pain/relaxation) leading to very intense sex...

Your rants are awesome, i can totally imagine a php elephpant thong

@AleCx04 haha thanks. Well, I imaginated that too 😏

I didn’t think I’d ever read PHP and thong in the same sentence

😂 That reminds me of video I recently saw. This guy was walking around and challenging other guys to fight, and he would rip off his t-shirt, and then strip his jeans off, and all he had on was a red thong with a hose like that elephant thing, and that would freak all the guys he challenged that even the ones who were going to take up the fight changed would just stop and then back off really quick.

“Me laughed” 🤣🤣 dying

@FastFwd00 XD Sorry, I was going to write “we” but when I tried to changed it, I couldn’t :c ++ because you noticed it 😉

@ElizadeathRaven haha no worries I love typos like that 😭 thanks for sharing the story it was fun to read

@FastFwd00 I’ll search in my box of memories for more stories like this 😉 Bizarre rant comming soon

@ElizadeathRaven lol cool, if you see someone somewhere lemme know :P I wanna get one

@AleCx04 Where are you from? I think you can found them at a sex shop 🤔 but I’ve seen elephant thongs at cheap stuff shops on downtown 😂

@ElizadeathRaven south Texas :P and the closest thing to a sex shop where I live are a couple of Spencers stores at the malls. Other than that we are out of luck for such items :P

@M1sf3t maybe I am just unaware of them here. I truly believe that there are none in my city. Its an otherwise boring place.

@M1sf3t well, @AleCx04 did say south Texas. I would imagine that means Corpus or Brownsville or thereabouts. I'm pretty sure they have them in Houston and here in Dallas, and most likely in Austin as well. San Antonio may be iffy. And I'm sure they're available on Amazon in all imaginable, and maybe unimaginable styles.

@AleCx04 South Texas? Wow! 😱 I’m from north Mexico (north Chihuahua, Juarez to be more specific) we’re neighbors then 😁 @M1sf3t yeah, I love Spencer’s shops 😂 I bought a “Grumpy cat” blanket and many goth accesories in there, and I’m sooooo tempted to buy something of the adult section XD

@ElizadeathRaven habremos tenido ya esta conversacion? Podria jurar que ya habia conocido a otro usuario aqui que venia de Mexico :P we are neighbors :P

@AleCx04 no sé 😂 no creo, llevo relativamente poco en DevRant. Junta de DevRanters regionales 🎉🎈

The trunk's shape looks a bit too pointy. Is it elastic? 🤣

@PonySlaystation I don’t know, fortunately I couldn’t figure that out 😂

@SoulSkrix you’re welcome 😉

Le me, at UNI, first semester, second tutorial on C.
Not sure how strings work
Googled "C strings"
Had a good laugh with all the people around me.

Break ups always makes me sad