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vane113044yWhen I see the obstacles in project it’s because I arrived to the crime scene as a new detective.
I usually start from analyzing what’s wrong to have deep understanding and after that I break lots of things by moving code here and there and after that remove shit from the fan for about a week.
Everyone’s mad and yelling cause they had “almost working project” but I don’t give a fuck. I just cut and open wounds to put hands as legs or dick as head.
When I cut it depends on my inner mood. Since I work remotely I can even watch tv while doing it.
When I am at this point I know what I am doing and I already accepted the consequences.
When I was younger and I worked in the office and there were people around I listened to heavy metal music because I wanted to kill everyone because they’re stupid assholes and I’m fixing their world so they can still live there.
Nowadays when I mostly work from home I am very peaceful. -
Inxentas7904yMy hero process is self-manufactured. First, I go to work. I implement all the bells and whistles without the yet-to-be-designed functionality. I then deploy that shit on a friday and save the world on monday.
Those to whom I must be obedient by contract, will take the fall for me. And they better not take it out on me, because I will piss then off with having the entire shitshow documented, including the request to push to prod.
Sometimes I update versions without being asked. On the boss' time, off course. It's something I guess. -
Heh, this would be a good weekly topic.
Mine tends to be:
1. Find a quiet space where I won't be disturbed. Work in silence. I can't listen to music if I need to concentrate.
2. Aimlessly and manically jump around all over the place for a few minutes trying to work out what on earth is going on.
3. If 2. doesn't work, start going through stuff in a more structured fashion.
4. Make a list of stuff I need to do to fix this (assuming it's not trivial.)
5. Manically press keys until fixed.
As an occasional process, I'll admit it brings a bit of a rush that I quite enjoy. But if it's the sort of thing that's happening once a week or more, and the root causes that you bring up are never been addressed, then most definitely time to GTFO. -
scout28124yMy hero process...is to first leave everything and go eat something nice.
Then .....
Wait I don’t think I have any process -
I don’t think I have a hero process. Unless “automate everything and let the computers do all the work for the humans as God intended” counts.
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witchDev7744yMy hero process is to take an aggressive nap first then wake up with a game plan which usually gets executed in the early hours of the morning. I am a big morning person and most productive between 7 am to 12 pm.
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I just work until I look at my code, get depressed from it and stop until the rest of the day lmfao
(I get "depressed" from my code because I look at code that others made and I see that mine is a total fucking mess and it's not documented) -
Loud music (ANC headset)
Cursing. (Home office, but I cursed in office, too)
Hatred. Rage. Misanthropy.
Suddenly it's working because my brain is afraid of the ... fascinating .... ideas I have.
At least I think it works like that... Cause the violent and gory fantasies I sometimes have during coding are disturbing. -
Similar to yours, actually..
Step 1: switching music to playlist that starts with 'I want to play a game' & saw theme song & after that it's just the background noise, so I cannot say what is rolling on..
Step 2: put on crappy headphones that were found laying around in the office some time ago and noone claimed.. they are not noise canceling, but compared to the pods that come with the phones or laptop speakers, they are still awesome!!
Step 3: hiss at the boss if he aproaches to check if I managed to fix the fuckup
Step 3.x: proceed to yell at the boss to stop interrupting me if he makes the mistake of additional checkups..
I'll tell you when it's done or I need input from you, no need to hoover!!
Step 4: vooDoo most of the time, with lots of swear words, coffee & cigarettes (I need to quit!!)
StepN: fixing the goddamn awfull mess I didn't create (most of the times) so everyone is happy
Step N+1: get yelled at by my boss why the fuck I'm in the office so early (normally it's usual time, even after an all nighter, I just sleep for an hour or so and come back..or just take a nap at the office)
Step N+2: getting coffe with boss & some coworkers, polishing up stuff from last night disaster
Step N+3: going home early to get some rest (usually still the normal time, just no overrclocking that day)
I must say allnighters haven't happened in ages, so I am quite happy about this. For 'normal, everyday fuckups' procedure is still the same minus being tired as shit..
HISSSSSSSS!!
Related Rants
I don't always listen to music while coding, but when I do, it's because things are absolutely unmitigably fucked and it's going to take some herculean effort to unfuck it.
I have this thing I've done for more years than my kids have been alive when shit really hits the fan and I need to show the staff the old lady can still lay waste.
Step 1: put on "the playlist," which consists of only the most aggressive 90s marilyn manson songs.*
Step 2: put on the headphones, which are noise cancelling and super bassy
Step 3: pound a monster (blue, obv)
Step 4: get super manic
Step 5: get in the zone and destroy several features or a flotilla of bugs in a single night
Step N: make absolute fucking magic
Step N+1: call in sick the next day and sleep til noon
What's your hero process?
*Content has less to do with it than the headspace I've come to associate with it and the fact I can't get drowsy with the constant aggression.
rant
excessive force is probably the answer
violence
when all else fails
rage
burnout fuel
top of the mountain
ballmer peak