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Search - "wk203"
Had a dodgy stomach. Muted the mic & let out an almighty fart.
Only, as you'll have guessed (and I quickly guessed from the silence that followed), I'd missed the mute button.16
Co-worker presented her work by sharing her screen. She forgot to unshare.
She proceeded to open Chrome and search: "Can I sue co-worker if I get coronavirus because he coughed?"
Another employee said: "Your screen is showing" :/14
I thought I muted my mic and started insulting everyone that was in the call because they were making things that could be done in literally 3 seconds last 2 hours and an half. Then I noticed that the mic was on and just left the call.7
I was asked to present a code I wrote previously. This was not planned. I shared my screen and presented. Things went well.
One employee asked me to search a particular term which was possibly related to an advance topic in the domain we were working on.
I opened Chrome and the first page had a Quora post: "Why my dull co-workers try to act smart and are not yet fired?".
A dude was caught fapping hard to the hot girl in our class. She cried when she found out
That dude is a creep37
We were once in an all hands (200+ people) and our over-seas folks had to call in. It was like 10pm there. One guy (who was on our team) was in bed with minimal clothing on, laying sideways in the come hither position on his bed. I think you see where this was going.
He accidentally had the camera on and briefly was on the projector in front of the entire meeting room, mostly naked. He saw what was going on, a look of terror came over his face and I never saw someone move so fast as he jumped off the screen and turned the camera off. There was a lot of shushed giggling.
Washboard abs though so it wasn’t like it was a total embarrassment. I was impressed frankly. Probably one of the best days in my professional career. We still love him very much of course, awesome team member!
The lesson here should be obvious. Even when you’re working from home, put your damn pants on for your meetings. You know just as well as the person standing next to you that every single GUI made in the last 15 years was designed to be as hard to use as humanly possible and as long as there is a chance that it’s going to show your bare ass to your company it will happen unless you got them pants on.8
On a holiday, Manager called for a sudden meeting to discuss an unimportant topic.
I pretended that my audio was not working. The meeting ended in 5 minutes and I went back to sleep.11
Most... Awkward... Video call... Ever!
Ended about 7 minutes ago. This one guy... Seriously! I mean... 🤷♂️ Everyone thought he's just uncomfortably open but when he finally got out of the shower he panicked, screamed like a girl, fell down and covered his camera asking: "Guys, when you were talking just now... Was there anything... Like... *Weird* on my stream?"9
Manager: I'm so sorry to say but your collegue A has passed away yesterday afternoon. There will obviously be flowers etc and we'll try to support her family as much as we can..
Me: Oh, no. My deepest condolences. (I'm always bad at saying much in situations like this, but)
B: My gosh! So does this mean A's family also caught it??!? (Corona)
Manager: She died in a car accident.
Also how unfortunate. Due to the lockdown, a ton of the people use the roads as a racing track around here...12
I’m on video calls very often, but never really bothered if I’m wearing a shirt or tee. Even when the call is with people like CEOs or bosses.
This time though, the friend specifically asked to be in a good shirt, be professional and shit. Till this point all I knew was the friend started a very amazing business of sort and would like me to join too. And the person I’ll be meeting is very busy and impossible to get an appointment.
The buildup is so much for this call that I’m wondering it’s either going to be CIA or scam. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t CIA.
A few minutes into the call, I get a feeling it’s a scam. A few more minutes and I was sure it’s a pyramid scheme.
Now, I can’t call it out because the friend is really into it, almost blindly believes this scheme, and isn’t ready to hear any counter-arguments. So I thought, let’s just get over with this call.
The call went on for 3 hours. 3 WHOLE HOURS. I had to be attentive, professional, and not laugh on their face for 3 hours. On top of that, I was feeling hungry AF.
Mr. impossible-to-get-appointment was explaining Robert Kiyosaki’s financial theories - in a completely incorrect manner and interpretation. I tried correcting a couple of times, because I’ve read his books and theories in detail - but this person just went on and on and on for 3 fucking hours.8
That time when this other manager used a "city buildings" background while his hair was swaying around as if he's actually on a rooftop. People started teasing him about his "nice background" while me and my colleagues joked in our group chat about seeing Godzilla in one of the buildings.
Halfway through the call, a woman appeared in the background and he signalled her to go away while they're both laughing then his webcam turned off.
Maybe he unleashed his Godzilla.1
Things I learnt by attending meetings from home:
* Wear pants even if no one can see them
* After meeting is done, turn off your computer to ensure it has ended.
* Mute and screen share is not reliable
* Tell your family members that you will have a meeting so they do not do anything weird.4
Boss joined a conference call from home, wearing a pink/salmon coloured T-shirt I, for several minutes, thought was just skin and that he'd forgotten to put on clothes before the meeting (we didn't have to join with video)2
Most awkward video conference call?
Our department is in a 'virtual' book club, reading The Unicorn Project, and I asked..
Me: "So what similarities have you seen with the Phoenix project and projects we work on here?"
Dale: "Ha ha..sooo many. The biggest is the disconnect of managers with no clue of what goes on."
<Vice president of our department also in the book club>
VP: "Really? Dale, I'd like to know more about this."
<awkward silence with blank stares all around>
DBA: "Come on Dale...spill the beans. Got the VP right there."
Dale: "Um...nope...not going there...nope"
<Dale's screen goes black>
VP: "OK, so when Maxine asks ..."
I am not good with kids. I know I know. Last week or so, my managers kid thought it would be a good idea to hijack my meeting. I was sharing my screen and on full blown explanation mode, only to realise after my explanation, it was the kid who was looking at my face and not the boss man.
God I panicked. I was like 'Who the hell are you?'
--------*INSERT AWKWARD SILENCE HERE *---------2
I don't really have an awkward video conference experience. But what about a hypothetically awkward experience? Like hiring performers to act things out in the back ground?4