When your gf isn't a Dev but still tries to surprise you on your birthday with an HTML cake. But your OCD is killing you because of the mistakes

Src: IG - developers_team

When you watch LotR as a geek xD

Professor : Explain deadlock and I will give you full marks.

Me:- You give me full marks and I'll explain deadlock.

CIA, NSA... if anyone 's listening.. Can you guys please tell me my root password.. :/.. I forgot..

true story...

Turning off your pc by holding down the power button is like putting yourself to sleep every night by shooting yourself in the face with a tranquilizer gun

Minitab...

I'd stay away from that 🐕 ...

Yesterday my father called me and asked if I'd have a look at his website to exchange his logo with a new one and make some string changes in the backend. Well, of course I did and hell am I glad I did it.
He had that page made a few years ago by some cousin of a friend who "is really good with computers", it's a small web shop for car parts and, as usual costumer accounts. Costumer Accounts with payment infos.
Now I've seen a lot of bad practices when it comes to handling passwords and I've surely done a few questionable things myself but this idiot took the cake. When a new account was registered his php script would read the login page, look for a specific comment and add a string "'account; password'," below into to a js array. In clear text. On the website. One doesn't even have to breach the db, it's just there, F12 and you got all the log ins.

Seriously, we really need a licensing system for devs, those were two or three years this shit was live, 53 accounts... Now I've gotta decipher this entire bowl of spaghetti just to see if he has done any more unspeakable things.

Encoding strikes yet another victim

What if the g in gif is silent?

Use git or get hit

We must develop and test our code

...via VirtualBox...

...running Windows XP...

...using IE...

..with vanilla Javascript...

...help me...

Everyone else on discord be playing games, Me:

Uhh... OK

Just received a mail from my college that my college's student account password does not contain any special characters and I should change it immediately. Wtf? How did they know that?

Anti-virus cable to reduce virus noises

I was tasked with maintaining a handful of chemistry simulations for the web. First things first, replace these outdated links and turn them into Bootstrap buttons that work on mobile. Wait, why do all of these look so horrible on mobile? nothing's scaling properly. *looks at fucking 1,000-line CSS file* The old developers used position:absolute for absolutely EVERYTHING. And I counted one div on the entire page. This is why you don't trust chem engineers to do your "web design" #FuckDreamweaver