Yesterday I was told of a game called APEX legends. Last one standing wins - how suiting!

In salesforce, the baseclass of "Object" is SObject and the baseclass of an apex class is object.
Whoever named this smoked too much.

AutoRABIT supports a maximum length of 16 chars in my password.
Thank you, AutoRABIT. FUCK YOU AutoRABIT.

Microsoft Web Api:
"you can pick up on some of these implicit behaviours by reading the unit tests for the default model binder."
I don't know what I expected.

Spring for .net's documentation was last updated on 8/1/11...
Now I know, why nothing is working.
Fuck this.

TILb
C++ Templates are generics on steroids.
I'm kinda dying

Scaling a webservice with session management horizontally.

*me, coding at a pub*
*random dude walks up to me*
He: "what are you doing? Programming? What?"
Me: "yup. That's a horizontally and vertically scalable webservice, that's using amqp, rest APIs and encryption to schedule starting, stopping and autoscaling of a total of 90 heroku applications. This webinterface *showing* allows you to trigger starts and stops manually and monitor all processes."
He: "oh, so you are programming a Website? In HTML?"
Me: "euhm........ Yes."

I understand this dude had probably no clue what I was talking about.. Yet I am angry at him. Reducing more than 12k loc to HTML... Go fuck yourself.

I just released the first version of my most successful project. :)
It's a salesforce data migration tool that replaces AutoRabit for our company. The tool includes an own programming language to freely manipulate records and compared to AutoRabit which needs 12 hours for a full migration my tool needs 8.
Minutes.
A total of 18k fucking loc.

It seems to be fucking impossible to just read a part of an XML file with c#'s XmlSerialisation and deserialize it into objects of a single class and add other objects to the same XML without loosing other nodes.
Go fuck yourself Microsoft

Sf bulk api:

CurrentPollingInterval = 1000;
While(jobRunning) {
...
CurrentPollingInterval = Math.Max(16000, CurrentPollingInterval *= 2);
}

Max/Min...
Why does this take so long..
I am fucking retarded...

ToDoList<T> : IWriteOnlyQueue<T> where T : IImpossibleTask

F. M. L.

./ChristmasWithFamily > /dev/null

I'm happy it's over and I can be alone again.

So int and datetime are not nullable in c#, so you cant assign null to them
While you can't compare int to null (int a; a==null won't compile) you can do it with datetime objects.
Microsoft, can you please get your shit together?

Took me like an hour to realize my date is actually the 1.1.0001 and not null.

!!shortRant
Took over a project of someone leaving the company. 5k loc in 1 File. 40 classes, mccabe average is 12.
FUCK THIS SHIT

*me calculating rsa*
"aight.. Public key is 9 and n"
*calculating private key*
*recalculating cause I fucked up*
*recalculating cause I'm retarded*
*3rd recalculation*
"ok, I figured out my private key is 9 (and n)"

.... Wait a second.

!(('A'-65) || rant)

I just tried calling DoubleStream.range(0,100) in Java.
I am not a smart man

Prof ranting about me cause I asked why he had an increase of 3.5dB when doubling voltage on his ppt. Told me I should have searched online to get why it is 3.5dB
YOU FUCKING RETARD IT IS 3.01 AND YOU CAN CALCULATE THAT

Definition of consistency:
These are the only classes in the whole project.

Thank you, company forced windows update! My 60 minutes reconfiguring rabbitmq and postgres were well invested instead of investigating the memory leak fucking hibernate causes.
I'm done.

If you do this, I hate you.

Been developing a Java app for 3 months, including basically everything from aop to rest services.

Meeting with po:
Me: So, guess how many loc I wrote.
Po: 400?
Me: *laughs* I'll get to 10.000 this week.

MAN COMES IN WITH CHANGING REQUIREMENTS ON AN HOURLY BASIS YET STILL DOESNT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH WORK ALL THIS SHIT IS!!