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Search - "sarcastically"
I’m kind of pissy, so let’s get into this.
My apologies though: it’s kind of scattered.
For @Root? Fucking never.
Maybe if I wanted to be a business major my mother might have cared. Maybe the other one (whom I call Dick because fuck him, and because it’s accurate) would have cared if I suddenly wanted to become a mechanic. But in both cases, I really doubt it. I’d probably just have been berated for not being perfect, or better at their respective fields than they were at 3x my age.
Support being a dev?
Not even a little.
I had hand-me-down computers that were outmoded when they originally bought them: cutting-edge discount resale tech like Win95, 33/66mhz, 404mb hd. It wouldn’t even play an MP3 without stuttering.
(The only time I had a decent one is when I built one for myself while in high school. They couldn’t believe I spent so much money on what they saw as a silly toy.)
Using a computer for anything other than email or “real world” work was bad in their eyes. Whenever I was on the computer, they accused me of playing games, and constantly yelled at me for wasting my time, for rotting in my room, etc. We moved so often I never had any friends, and they were simply awful to be around, so what was my alternative? I also got into trouble for reading too much (seriously), and with computers I could at least make things.
If they got mad at me for any (real or imagined) reason (which happened almost every other day) they would steal my things, throw them out, or get mad and destroy them. Desk, books, decorations, posters, jewelry, perfume, containers, my chair, etc. Sometimes they would just steal my power cables or network cables. If they left the house, they would sometimes unplug the internet altogether, and claim they didn’t know why it was down. (Stealing/unplugging cables continued until I was 16.) If they found my game CDs, those would disappear, too. They would go through my room, my backpack and its notes/binders/folders/assignments, my closet, my drawers, my journals (of course my journals), and my computer, too. And if they found anything at all they didn’t like, they would confront me about it, and often would bring it up for months telling me how wrong/bad I was. Related: I got all A’s and a B one year in high school, and didn’t hear the end of it for the entire summer vacation.
It got to the point that I invented my own language with its own vocabulary, grammar, and alphabet just so I could have just a little bit of privacy. (I’m still fluent in it.) I would only store everything important from my computer on my only Zip disk so that I could take it to school with me every day and keep it out of their hands. I was terrified of losing all of my work, and carrying a Zip disk around in my backpack (with no backups) was safer than leaving it at home.
I continued to experiment and learn whatever I could about computers and programming, and also started taking CS classes when I reached high school. Amusingly, I didn’t even like computers despite all of this — they were simply an escape.
Around the same time (freshman in high school) I was a decent enough dev to actually write useful software, and made a little bit of money doing that. I also made some for my parents, both for personal use and for their businesses. They never trusted it, and continually trashtalked it. They would only begrudgingly use the business software because the alternatives were many thousands of dollars. And, despite never ever having a problem with any of it, they insisted I accompany them every time, and these were often at 3am. Instead of being thankful, they would be sarcastically amazed when nothing went wrong for the nth time. Two of the larger projects I made for them were: an inventory management system that interfaced with hand scanners (VB), and another inventory management system for government facility audits (Access). Several websites, too. I actually got paid for the Access application thanks to a contract!
To put this into perspective, I was selected to work on a government software project about a year later, while still in high school. That didn’t impress them, either.
They continued to see computers as a useless waste of time, and kept telling me that I would be unemployable, and end up alone.
When they learned I was dating someone long-distance, and that it was a she, they simply took my computer and didn’t let me use it again for six months. Really freaking hard to do senior projects without a computer. They begrudgingly allowed me to use theirs for schoolwork, but it had a fraction of the specs — and some projects required Flash, which the computer could barely run.
Between the constant insults, yelling, abuse (not mentioned here), total lack of privacy, and the theft, destruction, etc. I still managed to teach myself about computers and programming.
In short, I am a dev despite my parents’ best efforts to the contrary.31
Just discovered that we are loading 200k for a custom font on one of our platforms...
200k FOR A FUCKING FONT?!? FOR REAL??? ITS NOT EVEN FUCKING DIFFERENT ON SIGHT!
So I sarcastically asked why the fuck are we using it and my coworker said its because the designer designed (duh) the layout this way...
Look... Usually I'm a quiet person and I don't rant in real life but this time I could not restrain myself.15
While working, my dad would come and stand behind me. Looking at the indentation, he would sarcastically say things like "Don't you know how to write?" or "Why are you writing so ziggy zaggy? " or "All these years of education, for what?"
The first two or three times I really had a good laugh. But after that, I really get pissed off.1
I, my dev friend and a non dev friend were having a deep Philosophical chat
NDF - while we are here on earth, we should give something back to the mankind
DF - Yeah man! (sarcastically pointing at me) But this guy never gives anything to anybody
Me - Oh I have contributed a lot to the mankind. You should check my github profile.
Needless to say two of us burst out laughing while one was giving blank stare.1
I'm starting to think about not working for this potential client I met today.
He said he wants me to modify an open source software, I asked him what language it's written with, he replied "Open Source". He thinks Open source was a language.
He hasn't even given me the link of the repo, he was already telling me not to put bug in the project in a bid to always make him contact me for updates.
I asked him sarcastically, "Who does that? ".
He was also talking about me doing minor tweaks here and there if need be after I deliver.
Too many red flags for me. No contract and I'm not interested. I foresee it's going to go sour.
What do you guys feel?15
Sent my coworker a LMGTFY link sarcastically, and he legitimately thought it was a great tool for showing people how you search for stuff on the internet.
This same client had never in his 50+ years on this Earth, used a debit or credit card to pay for a meal at a restaurant. Needless to say, we made him use his company card for every meal on the rest of the trip.
He also wears a black trench coat... Everyday.
Before I learned to use the gui and they saw a program cli: meh, ok sarcastically. After I learned the gui even if the program does absolutely nothing: wow! You have a future.1
Caused my first regression. Being sarcastically congratulated by co workers. Cant describe the feeling in any emotion possible and known to homo sapiens.1
So me and my friend had to create a script while we are mainlining some phones.
As you can imagine you have to build the kernel a lot and test often. As a Linux user that calls for a script.
Since the friend already had one I asked him for it.
Upon reading it I saw sudo when using fastboot. That is not needed when set up properly which I know he did since he can debug with ADB without sudo.
So I ask about it.
"Well that's just so that I don't flash old build when the current one fails and I don't wonder why it's still broken"
So I played some room music and created the top of the freaking line building script for our needs. It had everything. Making back up of the old builds. Error checking if the build fails and even tells you to fix it if it fails (LOL I had to do that).
So I send him this script. He looks at it. Thanks me and sarcastically says she it's just tiny improvement over mine lol.3
First day after my vacation. I started with a good old hello world programm. Boss totally understand me 😁
I accept offer letter from x company.
And just before 3 day of joining i got far better offer from company y.
So i told company x that i got better offer I don't want to join there anymore.
They told me that after accepting i should not find new job, my word has no value, and told me "keep that attitude (sarcastically).
I know i did wrong. How do you guys handle that?
Is it wrong to accept other offer after accepting one?8
Meetings are by definition not productive. I don't mean that sarcastically or cynically; if I'm not at my computer actively coding, debugging, or researching then I am officially off task.
Product management and financial types can have all the meetings they want, and try to involve me as little as possible.2